War is a Death Sentence
by tepaea
Summary: The weather of war can strip the strength from the most resilient person. How can you pick yourself back up when all that is around you is death and destruction? A story of adventure, laughter, heartache, and love. OC/Winters.
1. Appearances are Deceiving

This has been in my head for quite some time! Apologies for length – but I don't like to spoon feed the reader, and I wanted to give a reasonably thorough introduction to the story. Enjoy!

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**Chapter One: Appearances are Deceiving**

It was strange. For the first time, she felt relaxed. Well, as relaxed as you could be in the middle of a war. Still it was enough for her to finally give in to the tiredness. And boy, she was tired.

It had been ten days of hell. Heat. Sleep deprivation. Hunger. And the smell. Sure, sitting next to a bunch of awful smelling men wasn't fantastic, but hey, she knew what she was getting into when she agreed to join the unit. No, what killed her was the smell of the rotting bodies next to her. Perhaps in time she could shake the vision of death. But she definitely wasn't going to be forgetting that smell any time soon. It was so heavy, as if you could cut through it. The putrid, lingering smell that made you catch your gag reflex every time you took a deep breath to try and escape the heat.

"What you need, my _tamāhine_," my Mother always used to say, "is some good old fashioned pampering." For once, her Mother was probably right. It was a rare time that she, of all people, would admit that she needed to feel 'pretty'. But she figured after the last couple of weeks, it was perhaps not the worst idea she had ever heard. Well, if you could call washing her hair 'pampering'. In any case, she was definitely looking forward to feeling clean again.

A sudden jolt ripped her out of her sleep. It took a second for her to snap awake, switching from a sleep induced stupor to an alert, focused state of consciousness. Noise. Lots of noise.

She moved to grab her rifle and felt a whizzing sound past her ear. She flattened herself onto the bottom of the truck and twisted her head to see a hole penetrating through the tarpaulin. Too close.

"Troopers, move! Targets are situated in the clearing, to the left. Fire at will."

They were lightning quick in their movements. It was all too familiar. Find cover, find the target, pop the shot. Heartbeat thundering in her ears. Breathing shallow. The strain on her joints as she tracked her targets. Exhale, squeeze the trigger, release. Exhale, squeeze the trigger, release. Nothing else existed.

Feeling movement she briefly glanced to the right to see Roo taking up position next to her.

"Need a hand?"

"Does it look like I do?"

"Well, if there is one thing I've learnt about you, is that appearances can be deceiving."

"And if there is one thing I've learnt about you, is that you won't stop until all the women of the world are drooling at the sight of you."

"You're breaking my heart, Saz."

She smirked. "Australian."

She heard a grunt. "Kiwi."

She chuckled, and followed her next target. Exhale, squeeze the trigger, release. It was all too familiar.

* * *

**_Aldbourne, August 18 1944_**

Dick was deep in thought. Just over one month ago he was promoted to Captain, and it was something that he was deeply proud of. But at the same time, he didn't feel like he could really take any satisfaction from it. Obviously he wasn't so naïve as to think that no-one would die during the invasion – after all, war was in so many ways a death sentence – but he just hadn't envisioned that such an important promotion would come hot on the heels of the death of Lieutenant Meehan.

It was times like these that Dick really appreciated his stoic appearance. It helped to keep questions at bay, but –

"You think too much, Dick."

– unfortunately some people knew him too well.

"Morning, Lew."

"Seriously Dick, you think too much. Every time I see you lately you're staring off into space."

"Old habits, die hard," Dick shrugged at his friend. "You would know. How's the head this morning?" He grinned at Nixon, who screwed up his face.

"I disagree with that tone, my friend!" Nixon chuckled. "The head is fine, I shocked it back into gear with a cold shower this morning."

They started heading over to the lecture hall.

"Any idea what's on the agenda today, Captain?"

Dick rolled his eyes at Nixon.

"I'm going to keep making a big deal out of it until you stop squirming about it." Nixon said. He then stopped mid-stride. "Dick, people die, people get promoted. It's shit, but it's the truth. If you keep dwelling on how you got here, you'll never survive the rest of the war."

Dick sighed and looked Nixon in the eye. "Fair."

"Good. So let's go see what shenanigans we're in for today, shall we?"

* * *

She woke up in a spluttering, hacking mess. Ugh. She cracked open an eye and was greeted with a particularly gleeful Roo staring back at her.

"You're looking rather happy with yourself," she grumbled.

"Only because in about two minutes time I'm not going to have to put up with you hacking phlegm all over me in my sleep."

She shook her head and opened both eyes. "We're that close?" She wedged her fingers into a hole in the side of the tarpaulin. "Since when was it sunny in England?"

"Consider it God's gift to his favourite troopers," a voice boomed. "How you feeling today, Lieutenant?"

She turned to face who spoke. "Better, Captain. Better."

Captain Ryan gave her a wink, and she chuckled. Ryan was one of those men who, no matter what, always had a twinkle in his eye. Surprisingly, it was quite the redeeming feature in the middle of war. But that wasn't the reason why he was in charge. He was in charge because he was a natural born leader. Confident, intelligent, and constantly in tune with his surroundings. Everything a good officer needed to be.

"Good to hear. We need you in good shape so you can scare the crap outta these yanks for us, right boys?" Ryan roared.

"Definitely," a voice from the back exclaimed. "I never get tired of the look on people's faces when we get to roll you out in front of them."

"No, no, Mouse, you're mistaking the reaction that people have when they first meet you." She flipped back. The truck roared with laughter.

Mouse, was, by far, the smallest of the group. Barely scraping in at 5 foot 3 inches, he did not look like your typical special forces soldier. But what he lacked in height he made up for in other areas. He was quick on the battlefield. Extremely quick. He was also the perfect person to send out on reconnaissance, because, in another reference to his namesake, he was as quiet as a mouse.

Roo put his arm around her shoulders. "Come on, Saz. You know it's the only time you'll ever let us treat you any differently. Besides, you know you enjoy it."

She peered at her companions with a smirk on her face, and a mischievous look in her eyes. "Well sure, it is severely satisfying. But I'm not always so pleased about being the number one act in the circus' freak show."

"Nah, you're too good looking for that Saz," Roo said, while patting her on the cheek. "I think you're more of a show pony."

The air filled with laughter once again.

And even she had to laugh at that.

* * *

"Good morning, men." Colonel Sink appeared from the side of the room. "Please, please, take a seat."

"We have just a few administrative matters to file away today. As you are all aware, we have had a number of cancelled operations over the last month. The silver lining of all of that is that it's because we're just so damned good at what we do, boys!"

There were a numerous cheers around the room, and Nixon let off a short, sharp whistle next to Winters.

"But we are coming closer to the time that will see you boys dropped back into Europe."

The room got quieter.

"We don't know when yet, but it is important that you boys know that it will be soon. On top of that, you'll be having some guests accompany you."

Well, this was news to Winters. He glanced at Nixon, who had a confused look on his face. Apparently this was news to him too.

"A troop of Commonwealth Special Forces will be attached to Easy Company for the next operation. It is expected that there will be an increased need for small, tactical operations that they will assist Easy Company with, and vice versa."

Nixon raised his hand. "Sir, what exactly are you meaning by Commonwealth?"

Before the Colonel was able to answer, his aide was whispering in his ear.

"Why, I believe that they have arrived. Perhaps they can answer that question for you."

At that point a small group of sixteen men walked into the hall. To put it simply, they looked awful. Mud still caked on their faces, their uniforms, and their boots. They really had just arrived.

"Gentlemen, say hello to Captain Ryan." Colonel Sink turned to Ryan. "We just had a question seeking clarification as to what Commonwealth Special Forces are Captain, if you'd care to answer."

A stocky fellow, Ryan stepped forward to address the room. "To put it simply, Commonwealth Special Forces are, for lack of a better term, a 'break-off' squadron to the British Commandos, and are made up of personnel from throughout the Commonwealth." He gestured to the men behind him. "Our troop of sixteen here has 2 Canadians, and Australian, and a New Zealander. The rest of us are British."

Captain Ryan turned towards Colonel Sink. "Before we go clean ourselves and get some much needed sleep, Colonel, I'd like to make a quick introduction."

Colonel Sink nodded.

"Our troop organisation, while smaller in size, is not too dissimilar to yours. With that in mind, it is important to introduce to you my second-in-command, Lieutenant Price." Ryan gestured towards a figure in the middle of the row.

Winters could hear George Luz mutter a comment, but couldn't quite make out what he had said. There were a few whispers. He didn't understand what all the fuss was about.

And then the penny dropped.

Lieutenant Price, was a woman.

The Lieutenant took a step forward. From then on in it was as if time had suspended. Winters took in the figure. Tall, lean, and imposing. Dark. For all intents and purposes she appeared to be a very intimidating person, and on the surface, seemed completely at home in what the majority of women would find uncomfortable circumstances. But there was something else moving behind her eyes. He couldn't put his finger on it, but there was something... more.

Appearances really were deceiving.

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Please review, I'd really appreciate it.


	2. Introductions

I don't usually update this fast, but I want you all to see some development of the characters and their relationships (and the beginning of them!). Enjoy (and review!)

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**Chapter Two: Introductions.**

Sarah slowly drifted out of sleep. Jasmine. Her hair smelt like jasmine. She could feel a small smile forming on her face. _Oh that was satisfying._ She took a deep breath. No cough. No wheezing. Smooth, relaxed. She turned onto her side and buried her head in the pillow._ Clean sheets, it has been a while. _Stretching her limbs in all directions, she felt a release of pressure in her muscles and joints. The smile kept growing.

She took in the smell of the fresh cotton sheets, and it reminded her of home. _Home. I wonder how everyone is doing? _It had been months since she last wrote. She still remembered the date of her last letter. February 18, 1944. The day her brother died.

She had sent a couple of photos since then, but no words. It just all seemed so fruitless. What was she to say? "Hi, how's it going? I'm doing fine." She couldn't bear to lie to her family, but she knew that she also couldn't tell them how she was really feeling either. It wasn't fair to them. What could they do when they were thousands of miles away? No, it wasn't fair.

It may seem odd, but at the beginning the war hadn't been that bad. She hadn't formed any emotional connections to anyone, and so as heartless as it sounds, the death didn't bother her as much as it should have. Maybe it all just seemed too surreal. Maybe no connections meant it had little impact on reality.

And at the end of the day she was good at what she did. Some days she could even have said that she enjoyed it. And those around her noticed. One by one, they started talking to her. Asking for her opinion. Her advice. Her support. And then she was just like one of them. No more jokes about her sexuality. No more jokes about breaking her nails. Because she was better than all of them. And they knew it.

But she didn't remind them of it. There was no need to. She wasn't there to antagonise people, and as cold as she came off on the surface, she did want to make those connections. Make friends. Even if it meant opening the door to the pain that would eventually come with it. No, she wasn't heartless. She knew that she would never be able to survive the war without making those connections.

In the end it wasn't surprising at all to everyone when she was called into Regimental Headquarters that day. Though she had to admit that she was a bit surprised when she was told what for. Commonwealth Special Forces? She had no idea what it was. But they had an idea about her. She still remembered Ryan's words to her that day.

_"I had expected you to be shorter, Sergeant Price."_

_"Most people do, Captain. They figure my mouth makes up for my lack of height."_

The Captain chuckled. "We've heard good things about you." He approached Sarah. "A lot of good things. So much so, in fact, that I've been sent here to personally extend an invitation to join a new unit."

She remembered how she raised her eyebrow at him and cocked her head. It had really blown her away that she was being approached for a unit. No, in fact it has completely freaked the shit out of her. But she didn't need long to think about it. She could tell just by meeting and talking with Ryan for that short while that it was the right thing to do.

Fast forward a few months. And here she was. Sarah Price, that intimidating, independent woman, snuggling with her pillow. She couldn't help by giggle at the ridiculousness of it.

At that point she heard a pounding on her door. "Saz! You up yet?"

Roo.

More pounding. "Seriously, I'm coming in if you don't answer me."

"I doubt answering you would stop you." She called out.

The door opened and in walked Roo. She hid her head under a pillow.

"Wake up, sunshine!"

She cracked open an eye and peered out at him from underneath the hiding place. "Leave me alone. I'm being lazy. Ryan said I could be lazy. You got a problem, take it up with him."

He bent over a looked at her. "Change of plans. We have to dress in our one's and go to some meeting. Intelligence mumbo jumbo. I dunno. In any case -"

He stood at the end of the bed and ripped the sheets off her.

" – you need to start moving."

She launched herself out of bed and stood face to face with Roo. "Good thing you're my best friend or else I'd have to gouge your eyes out."

"Well, with the thoughts I'm thinking after checking out those legs of yours, you might want to anyway." He titled his head and stared at her up and down. "Seriously, Saz, if I didn't like you so much you'd leave me no choice but to seduce you."

She snorted. "Alright, get out." She shooed him towards the door. "Out! I'll meet you outside in ten minutes." She went to shut the door and stopped. "Please don't get into any trouble."

Roo feigned innocence. "Who, me?"

She shut the door and shook her head. She started to comb her hair. And then she thought back to the first time she met Roo. It wasn't exactly love at first sight. She had joined Captain Ryan and they arrived at a bar in the middle of Cairo. It was sweltering hot, and all she wanted was a beer. She had wandered up to the bar, only to have a young, blonde haired man stand in her way. He stared at her up and down with a smirk on his face. She had seen this look before.

_"What's a gorgeous woman like you doing in a place like this."_

_And there it was. Always the same. No, I'm not interested, she remembers thinking. She side stepped him, and continued to make her way to the bar._

_"Why so cold, sweetie?" Sweetie?_

_She turned to face him. "Yeah, I'm not your sweetie, so back off."_

_"Hey, hey –"_

_At this point Ryan stepped forward. "I wouldn't go there, if I were you."_

_The young man looked at Ryan. "Yeah, or what?" He turned back around to Sarah. "Seriously, honey," he placed his hand on her waist, "you don't know what you missi –"_

_She curled her fist and felt it punch forward. And all of a sudden he was doubled over, his breathing raspy and sharp. She had wanted to continue to the bar, but Ryan's laugh stopped her. She looked at him with a confused look on her face._

_"Sergeant Price," Ryan pulled on the collar of the man to straighten him up. "Meet one of your fellow troopers, James Clarke. Although we prefer to call him Roo."_

Sarah chuckled at the memory. It was hard to believe that she was now best friends with such a womaniser. Any woman he grew to like, he wouldn't touch. Hard to believe that once upon a time he was engaged. Whatever had happened meant that the boy now definitely had some issues.

* * *

She burst out of the office and towards her room. The speed of her walk was matched by the speed in which the thoughts were flying around in her head. _So much to do! Great timing Ryan._

Captain Ryan had been summoned to attend a meeting at Stirling Lines. Effective immediately, she was in charge of the troopers. And that meant work. Lots of work. Right now, she had to complete the post-battles reports for Ryan, and then she had to read through a rather large pile of material to do with their training with Easy Company over the next month. On top of that, she had to summarise it for the rest of the troopers, and then organise their kits, and then –

– papers were flying everywhere. Her reflexes kicked in an attempt to rescue the falling folders but it was too late. And then her limbs decided to join in on the fun. She fell forward and knocked her head against something particularly solid.

"Shit, shit, shit. Would you watch where you are going? Seriously, what the hell are you doing? Start paying attention to what is happening around you, now I have to try and get all of this stuff in order, and I have so much fucking stuff to do, and then you just walk straight into me..." She looked up to the moron that walked into her and saw the chevrons on his collar. Shit. He was a Captain.

She bolted up and stood straight. "My apologies, Sir."

"It's fine, Lieutenant. Let's collect all of this up, shall we?" She looked down and saw a twinkle in his eye. She glared at him and then started recollecting the papers.

_Son of a bitch. Oh god, I can't believe I just did that. What was I thinking. Crap!_ She could feel the heat rising up her collar, and she became well aware of the fact that he had noticed how flustered she was. She looked at him, and he had a crooked smile planted on his face. She got more annoyed.

"You have quite the hard head." He chuckled as he gave her back the last pile of strewn papers.

"You can talk." She replied curtly. "I'm sorry, Captain, but I have a lot of work to do." And with that she walked off, completely infuriated at the man that had witnessed her out of sorts. _Dammit!_

* * *

Winters looked on in awe of the woman that had just walked in to him. He had been watching on in amusement as he watched Bill Guarnere and Joe Toye argue about where you could buy the best Philadelphia Cheesesteak. Apparently it was quite the important debate. Completely in her own world, she rounded the corner and had smacked straight into him. He couldn't help but be entertained at the sight of limbs and papers flying everywhere. And it was clear that that annoyed her. The look on her face when she realised that he was a Captain was pure horror, and that just made him more amused.

He grinned at her. "You have quite the hard head." He chuckled quietly but it was clear that she had noticed it, and he could tell that she was starting to blush.

He handed her the last of the papers, which she snapped out of his hands. "You can talk." She blurted out. "I'm sorry, Captain, but I have a lot of work to do." And with that she wandered off, just as quickly as she had arrived.

Winters couldn't help but look on as she stormed past Bill and Joe. The woman was clearly on a mission. He followed her and he was well aware of the grin planted on his face. But it was all too amusing. He had managed to, even for a brief moment in time, crack that hard exterior of hers, and he was thoroughly intrigued. His eyes flicked back to Bill and Joe, who were also looking on in amusement. But at him. He knew he couldn't hide the look on his face, and so he kept on grinning, shrugged at them, and then wandered off.

* * *

Sarah was still stuck on the battle reports. She had done them before, but it was never easy to have to sit down and relive them all. Ryan always laughed at her because she insisted on being so detailed with them, but she felt that it was important to be. She didn't want to provide an incorrect report and have that potentially cause inconsistencies in future operations. Ultimately, if she did a terrible job it could lead to some poor kid's death. And she didn't want that.

Deep in thought, she didn't even notice that Roo had come into her room until she felt his hand on her shoulder. She turned and smiled at him.

"Saz, I've come to take you away from this life of administration, and to the world of men drinking beer in a bar."

She laughed. "Oh, you make it sound so appetising. Sorry, I really have to get these finished."

"Oh come on, Saz, you know as well as I do that those things aren't due any time soon." He pulled a chair up to the table and sat down. "I'm about to get all emotional, so don't get scared now. I've noticed the last couple of weeks that you've been pulling away from us all, you're constantly in that little world of yours. Seriously, what's happening with you? You're making me worried, who's going to be my wingman if you keep locking yourself away feeling sorry for yourself?"

She sighed and looked at him. "Honestly, I've just been thinking about home. I know I should write but..."

"... but it's hard. I understand Saz. Have you tried to just write something, anything?"

She shook her head. "I just sit there, staring at the paper. Ever since Charles died, it just seems like anything I want to say just doesn't matter."

He patted her on the shoulder. "Keep trying, you'll get there. Who knows, maybe if you come down a few beers with me at the bar tonight you'll get the epiphany you need?" He gave her a big grin. "Come on, man, you know you want to."

She laughed again. "This is why I like you so much, Roo. You have your priorities straight."

Roo was right. Sarah was having a fantastic time. It was good to just wind down, and have a good laugh. And the Easy Company boys were good value. She had already spent a significant amount of time chatting with George Lutz, who was quite the character. It was awful, but she could tell he was quite enamoured with her, and she probably shouldn't have kept talking to him. But he just made her laugh, and in the end, that was what she wanted to do tonight.

All of a sudden she could hear raised voices behind her. She swung around and saw Mouse in full flight, arms everywhere, having quite the fist fight with an American soldier. In a matter of seconds more troopers and soldiers had joined into the brawl. The rest, were all standing on chairs and tables and yelling at the sight of it. Animals.

She launched herself towards the pack of men, and started pulling them apart. She could see Mouse buried in the middle, and as she pulled more men off each other, she felt a fist connect with her jaw. She felt the pain fire up the side of her face, and felt the taste of blood in her mouth. _Well great._ She could see on the other side another American soldier wrenching men off each other. All of a sudden they were face to face, and she noticed it was the Captain she had run into today. _Well, fucking great._

With the brawl over, she turned to face the troopers. "What the hell do you think you are all doing?" She bellowed. The bar suddenly got very quiet.

"As much as you all might like to enjoy reminding everyone here that you're men, having to put up with such bull shit isn't something that I consider an enjoyable evening."

"Saz, you don't understand..." Mouse began.

"Shut your mouth and stand at attention. All of you." She glared at them all, and then turned to Mouse. "And it's Lieutenant." She stretched herself to her full height, looked at them all, and lowered her voice. "You know that I have high standards as to the behaviour of troopers, and tonight is no exception. I'm extremely disappointed in you all. I don't care what started it, acting like a pack of animals is no way to settle whatever was said."

She spoke louder. "Thanks to the boys here, all troopers in this bar are to immediately head back to the rooms. And if I catch any one of you outside of your rooms for the rest of the night, there will be hell to pay. You got that?" She saw some nods. "Now, move!"

Watching them all leave the bar, she became aware of the audience she had, and could feel the trickle of blood down her chin. She motioned towards the bar and smiled. "Well, don't let me stop you all."

She walked outside to get some fresh air. Closing her eyes, she took a number of deep breaths to help settle her pounding heart. _Idiots._

"That was quite impressive, Lieutenant." She glanced to her left to see her 'favourite' Captain standing next to her. He gave her a handkerchief from out of his pocket. "Here," he motioned to the cut lip.

She took it from him, and stuck it on her lip, which had now become quite puffy. "Thanks."

He stuck his hand out. "We haven't formally meet yet. Captain Dick Winters."

Looking at him closely, she took his hand and shook it. "Well, if we're being formal about it, I'm Lieutenant Hera Parihe." She chuckled at the confused look on his face. "I'm Maori. Sarah Price is the English transliteration of my name. But if it makes it easier for you, just call me Saz." She tilted her head and smiled. "I'd best be off. I have some troopers to check on. See you around, Captain."

Nodding, he gave her a small smile. For the first time, he felt quite comfortable with being called Captain.

* * *

Cheers all! :)


	3. Meaningful Silence

This chapter is devoted to some Sarah/Winters action. Well, not 'action' per say, but it will give you warm fuzzies!

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**Chapter Three: Meaningful Silence**

Sarah woke abruptly. Rubbing her eyes, she sat up and sighed. Leaning forward she felt her spine crack, and she cringed at the sound. _I wonder what the time is?_ A slit above the curtain revealed a small amount of light, but it didn't really help answer her question. Sighing again, she forced herself out of bed, and put her feet on the floor. Cold. She wiggled her toes and sighed. Again. _Everything is too much effort this morning. Not exactly the best foundation for the day._ Stumbling out of bed, she made her way across the darkened room and stopped at the curtain, peeling it back.

She looked into the distance but no sunshine was peeking over the hills yet. But it was still lighter, and the moon was quite low in the sky. _Can't be too far off sunrise._ She opened up a window and felt a small breeze brush through her hair. It felt quite liberating. _No more than an hour?_

She was definitely wide awake now. _Maybe I should do some work._ She glanced over at the typewriter and furrowed her eyebrows. Immediately she knew that she couldn't bring herself to do it. After last night, she wasn't particularly in the mood to jump straight back into the work. But she knew that she couldn't not do it either. _What the hell was Mouse thinking?_ She knew she had to get to the bottom of it.

Suddenly a yawn came upon her. Her mouth opened wide and she felt a sharp pain jolt up her face. _Christ._ _Maybe that did more damage than I thought._ She yanked open the other curtain and turned to the mirror. In the dim of the morning she could make out bruising on part of her chin and jaw. She knew in the light of the day it would probably be the centre of attention. _Definitely not looking forward to that._

She sat back down on the bed and rubbed her face. She hated feeling so negative. Cynical she could do. Distrusting? Not a problem. But negative, the kind of force that ate away at your soul, was not something she could tolerate. Especially in the middle of a war. _Right, Price. Time to snap out of it._ She glanced next to the bed, spotted her trainers and had an idea.

* * *

She wasn't sure how far she had run, but distance wasn't her goal this morning. What concerned her was trying to find a relaxing spot to just think for a little while. The area around Aldbourne was so flat that attempting to find a decent hill to watch the sunrise had proved a bit difficult. In the end she decided that she would just follow the main track and see where it took her. Her final destination was a hill overlooking the main village. _Perhaps some people watching might be in order_. She smiled. _If there are any awake at this hour!_

The cool morning breeze curved its way through the grass. Her thoughts turned to earlier that morning when it had flowed through her hair. _How long has it been since you wore your hair down during the day?_ She really couldn't recall. She yanked on the tie binding her hair together, and it dropped down, flying everywhere. _Better_.

The brawl in the pub last night would normally not have bothered her so much. After all, what is the use in trying to get to the bottom of an issue likely caused by an over abundance of testosterone, when you will never see those people again? But obviously this time around it was different. It was important that the troopers had a good relationship with Easy Company. If they didn't, it could get people killed. It was that simple.

Seeing something moving from the corner of her eye, she looked to see someone running toward her. Dressed in PT gear, that someone was most definitely a soldier. The soldier got closer before she realised that it was Captain Winters. She immediately felt a bit lighter. Clearly in his own world, he was staring off into the distance until he just about tripped over her long legs, which were stretched out on the ground. He stopped and smiled at her. She gladly did the same.

* * *

Dick ran most mornings. He found it was a good way to start the day as he was able to have some valuable thinking time. There was something about the cold air, the sound of his feet pounding on the pavement, and the rhythm of his breathing that relaxed him and focused his thoughts.

His thoughts drifted to the brawl last night. The sight of Lieutenant Price diving head first into it, pulling men of each other, and then clearly having so much authority was quite admirable. Actually, it was more than that. Not only did she command such a presence, but it was clear that she was well respected by the troopers. Many men could not do that. He had to admit he was in awe of her.

Suddenly something flashed in front of him. He snapped out of his thinking and side-stepped to avoid it. He then stopped. _It's a leg? _Following it along, he saw Lieutenant Price sitting on the side of the track. Her hair was loose, and was flying wildly in the morning breeze. It was quite the sight. _An attractive leg joint to an equally attractive woman. _

_Did I just think that? _He smiled at her, and was relieved when she did the same. He moved to sit next to her. With arms resting on his legs, he looked over to her and noticed in the early dim that some bruising had come out on her chin and jaw. "Does it hurt?"

She lightly touched it. "Funnily enough, only when I smile. I was thinking about avoiding smiling for the day."

_You smiled for me. _"After the night you had last night, I think everyone would understand if you didn't."

"I know," she said, while staring off into the distance. "But I don't want it to be like that." She turned to face him. She sat there studying him for a moment. There was a look on her face, but he couldn't quite make out what it meant. Watching her, he took in her mannerisms as she thought. A small frown joined the furrowed eyebrows. A slight squinting of the eye. A tilt of her head. It was fascinating.

A small nod indicated that she had clearly made whatever decision she felt she had to make. "It's important to have Easy and the troopers get along. Not just to the operation but for our own survival. And well, it's important to me."

She once again stared into the distance. The beginnings of the sunrise scattered rays of light across her face. "What happened last night, I want to fix it somehow. There has to be a way to fix it. Do you know who the American soldier who was fighting with Mouse? I thought maybe I could talk to him?"

_She's opening up to me. _He saw that she had pulled her knees to her body and was resting her head on her legs, looking at him. _She wants my advice._ "I think you'll find the soldier was a NCO. Staff Sergeant Bill Guarnere. Talking could work?" He thought. _Would it work? Bill can be a bit straight. That said, she can clearly handle herself. _

She frowned. "Would he not be very responsive to a woman officer speaking with him?" She said, almost reading his mind in the process.

"Bill is fairly traditional. But that said, I think he'd like you." He smiled at her. _What's not to like?_ "He's a good guy. While you being an officer might have taken a number of us by surprise, he would respond well to someone being upfront with him and talking to him. Woman or not."

"You were surprised?"

He wasn't expecting that. He twitched slightly and looked at her. The morning sun made her skin glow. "Would you believe me if I said I wasn't?"

She laughed. "You'd be lying through your teeth if you told me you weren't. Still, you come across quite traditional yourself. " Running her hand through her hair, he watched her peer at him from the corner of her eye. "How do you feel about me?"

_About you? _

"Me being an officer, I mean."

He had to admit that he was taken aback when he first realised that she was a woman. In the army. In a special forces unit. A Lieutenant. But he had quickly come to the conclusion that there would have been no way on this earth that she would have gotten into that position if she wasn't good enough. In fact, she would have had to be more than good enough. She would have to be excellent.

_Just tell her._ He sighed and looked at her. There was a look of apprehension on her face. _Is she nervous about what I am going to say?_ He felt warmth in the knowledge that she cared about what he thought about her. "Sarah, only foolish men can't recognise a good thing when they see it."

Immediately her eyes let off a twinkle, and she gave him a smile. "Thank you."

He smiled back, and then turned to see the sun peeking over the hill, shedding light on the village. He didn't know what it was, but he felt very comfortable with Sarah. And as she stayed there, watching the sunrise with him in a meaningful silence, he couldn't help but think she felt the same.

* * *

My original chapter plan had this chapter as being longer, but I thought that this was a nice ending. And I thought that it was cute having a chapter devoted to the two main characters in the story. You will see in Chapter 4 how this story will connect with Operation Market Garden, so you will see more action. Til then!


	4. The Fixer

The next two chapters were written as one, but I thought it might be better for me to try be a bit more consistent with my chapter lengths! Enjoy, and please review. I'd be keen to hear people's thoughts about Sarah.

* * *

**Chapter Four: The Fixer**

_**Aldbourne, August 26**__**th**__** 1944**_

It had been just over a week since the troopers had arrived in Aldbourne. It was weird, but the week had been more complicated and stressful that being out in the field. Maybe it was because killing was well, simple. It was all about three things: exhale, squeeze the trigger, release. But attempting to build relationships with people? Yeah, that was a bit harder.

It had been nice to have some company the previous morning, in the form of someone that she considered to be a new friend. Sarah had always found it hard to make new friends, but she fully admitted that it was her own fault. She could be extremely distrusting. But there was a way that Dick presented himself, and interacted with those around him, that put her at ease.

She had thought about the best way to approach Bill in order to chat with him about the brawl. She really hoped she wasn't making the wrong decision. With men, the majority of the time they got into a brawl just well, because. But ultimately she felt that she couldn't risk it if the fight had actually been about something important. So, it was better in the end to potentially make a fool of herself in front of this soldier, instead of leaving it to fester.

While some would question her returning to the scene of the crime to talk to Bill, the fact that there was plenty of liquor available to help grease the cogs made it the perfect location. She entered into the pub and immediately spotted Bill, who was rather conveniently located at the end of the bar. As she stepped a bit further into the smoky room, a few soldiers turned around to look at her. She had to admit that she was beginning to squirm with the attention of it, particularly with some making comments about the bruising on her chin and jaw.

Just as the attention of it all started to give her cause to second guess her plan of attack, a saviour in the form of none other than George Luz appeared in front of her. "Hello there, Lieutenant Price. Are you here for some liquor," he leaned in, "or just to visit me?"

She laughed loudly. "I tell you what, you get me a pint and I'll publicly agree that it is the latter."

"You're on."

* * *

Sarah wound up spending most of the night drinking with the Easy boys. And she could tell that she was feeling the effects of the alcohol. She was light headed, flushed, and blissfully happy. It must have been quite a different sight for some of the boys to behold. She had Luz sitting across the table from her, flashing her with that admittedly gorgeous grin, and another pint in her hand. _How did I let myself get so drunk? _She peered over at Bill, who was still sitting at the end of the he was surrounded by a few other soldiers, and she wasn't particularly keen to approach him with such an audience. _Who would've thought I was such a coward?_

"Why the long face, sunshine?"

She looked at Luz in disbelief. "Did you seriously just call me sunshine?"

For the first time in his life Luz was speechless. A look of sheer horror crossed his face and she had to admit that she found this ability to intimidate the men amusing. A voice called from the other side of the room, "When I called her sweetie I got a fist to my balls, so I'd be watching it if I were you!"

She rolled her eyes, and waved her hand dismissively in Roo's direction. "Oh shush and get back to your hounding of the local ladies." She glanced over her shoulder and saw him doing just that, shook her head, and chuckled. "I hope you're not like that, Luz."

"Me? Oh never, I swear. I only reserve my attention to the most deserving." His eyes twinkled as he looked at her. _What are you doing, Price? Don't lead him along._

She nervously avoided his gaze and spied Bill, who was now all alone. _This is my chance. _She looked back at George, who was still peering at her. "Luz, I believe I have taken up far too much of your time this fine evening."

"Oh, I don't think it would have been as fine if I hadn't have spent it with you."_ I so walked right into that one._

"Still, I suspect that some of the ladies here have become rather jealous of me." She motioned over to Roo, who was preoccupied with two young women in the corner of the room. "I don't suppose you could go check on my buddy over there, could you?" She leaned into Luz and lowered her voice. "He tends to get himself into trouble when it comes to women." She chuckled.

Luz looked a bit disappointed but she attempted to soften the blow by giving him a big smile. He immediately brightened up a bit. "Anything, Lieutenant."

"I owe you a pint, Luz." And with that she picked up what was remaining of her beer, patted him on the shoulder, and headed over to Bill.

The pub was filled with noise and laughter, and Sarah hated to descend on Bill with such a serious topic to discuss. Still, it had to be done, even if having to have that conversation was clearly making her squirm. She slid into the chair next to Bill, and he looked up at her. "What are you drinking tonight?"

He looked at her suspiciously. "Well, I'll be damned if a broad buys me a drink."

"What about a Lieutenant, then?"

He continued peering at her. "Whisky."

She motioned to the bartender and pointed at the empty glass in front of Bill. "Fill 'er up." As the bartender was walking away, she picked up her glass, and downed the remnants of her pint. "This too, thanks." She slid the glass down the polished wood, and turned to Bill. "So where are you from, Sergeant Guarnere?"

"South Philly. You?"

"Small country called New Zealand. You heard of it?"

"To be honest with you, no."

She laughed. "Most people haven't." The bartender arrived with their drinks and she took a rather large gulp of her beer. She hadn't felt this awkward in quite some time. _Lord, even my hands are sweating. This is ridiculous!_

Bill's voice snapped her out of her self-loathing. "Look 'ere, Lieutenant. I don't mean to be rude, but is there a reason why you're sitting here with me right now?"

"Christ, Dick was right, you do cut straight to the chase." She gave him a smile. "I like it."

"Aye, well you know ol' Guarnere doesn't like to disappoint."

"It's about the brawl the other night with Mouse. You know. The small one."

"Yeah, what about it."

She took a quiet breath and looked at him intensely. "Mouse ain't telling me what was said. The fact that he isn't saying anything to me, makes me think that it was about more than just you boys having a bit too much to drink, if you know what I mean."

He continued staring at her with those dark eyes of his. _Oh boy, this is like getting blood from a stone. _

She decided to change tact. "I'll be honest with you, I can't be bothered putting up with bullshit. Now, if me and my men here gotta fight along side you boys, you need to cut the crap. I'm not stupid enough to think that none of the men here will die out there, but I'm damned if I'll let you stubborn bastards add to the tally. So tell me what he said."

She drew in her breath sharply and watched for his reaction. Over his shoulder she saw Dick come into the bar with Lewis Nixon, who she had had some dealings with in her intelligence briefing. Dick spotted her and noticed she was with Bill, gave her a small nod, and then headed in the other direction. Bill slouched back and gave her a look.

"There was a conversation about military service running in families. He was going on and on about how no-one in his family had ever died in any war, like he was some fucking god." He leaned into her. "And so I decided to call your trooper a few names. He thought he would do the same, but he made a few about my family. You don't make comments about my family."

She looked at him intently and thought. His body language seemed quite hostile, which made her think that there was more to the story than he was letting on. He was clearly still quite riled up about it. "And?"

"Hm." He jerked his head back and frowned at her. "My brother. He made a comment about my brother."

She lowered her eyes at him. _What would I do if someone made a comment about my brother?_ And then it dawned on her. "When?"

He knew what she meant. "Just before the jump into Normandy. Fucking Monte Cassino, wherever the fuck that is." He shook his head and took a drink.

"Italy." She stared into her drink. "It's in Italy."

She could feel his eyes fixed on her. "When for you?" His voice was softer and quieter.

"February 18. Worst day of my life."

"I hear that."

"I'm sorry Mouse was such a bastard."

"Ah, look, you're right, he is a bastard." Bill told her. She looked up at him, laughed, and shook her head. "But don't worry about it. I say enough bad things in my time to know it ain't done on purpose."

They both tipped back their glasses and drank the rest of their drinks. "Refill?" She asked Bill.

"It's on me, Lieutenant."

* * *

_**Aldbourne, August 30**__**th**__** 1944**_

It was late at night, and the boys were in the middle of an exercise. There had been a few tactics lectures this week, and the decision had been made to put it into practice. Because Ryan had returned a couple of days before, and she had taught the lessons, she was left with Nixon to design the exercise, deliver the mission objectives, and to wait for it to be done. And it annoyed the crap out of her.

"Last time I checked I was attached to you lot as well." She grumbled at Nixon, who was sitting next to her.

"Hey now, I don't make the rules."

"You know what I mean, Nix. Both of us should be out there getting used to the two groups interacting. How the hell are we supposed to do it when we actually jump?"

He shrugged. "I wouldn't worry about it. Besides, not much you can do it about it."

He was right. But it still annoyed her.

"Be honest with yourself." He turned and grinned at her. "You just want to be out there with your gun."

She chuckled inwardly. "You're probably right."

"Or you know, showing George Luz how amazing you are."

She stopped and looked at him. "Excuse me?"

"I'm an Intelligence Officer. You don't really think that I wouldn't have noticed how his eyes follow you around the room?"

_Son of a bitch_. "Right."

He raised his eyebrows at her.

"What?" She said to him.

"Well," he said, "how do you feel about him?"

"Are you seriously asking me that question?" She looked at Nix and his face answered her. "You are seriously asking me that question. He's a friend; he makes me laugh."

"Ah-huh."

"Don't start."

He held his hands up in mock surrender. "Hey, hey, promise I won't tell a soul."

She turned and glared at him. "Tell a soul about what? There isn't anything to tell them about!"

"Gee, kid, who would have thought it was so easy to wind you up." She looked at the grin forming on his face. _Dammit! I took the bait._ "I think I may have found your weakness."

She sighed. He was right, in a way. She definitely didn't do relationships with men well. Friendships were fine, but anything more than that really freaked her out. More often than not she got herself into trouble because what she deemed as a normal friendship with a man was seen differently from the other side. Case and point: George Luz. But why should her having a laugh and a beer mean that she wants to jump into bed with them? Her only hope was to act completely stoic all of the time, and that wasn't something she really wanted to do. _Maybe I should cut out the alcohol like Dick._ She definitely didn't do herself any favours once she got a few pints into her.

All of a sudden Nix and Sarah were interrupted by that one, terrifying word. "MEDIC!" _Medic?_ She looked at Nix. "Shit!" She stood up quickly and looked to where the voices were coming from and saw a group of soldiers running out of the darkness toward her. She turned to Nix to tell him to find someone, but he was already running off in the other direction.

She pushed forward and saw Winters in front, followed by a group of men carrying a wounded soldier. She looked at Winters. "Who?" He looked behind her, and she saw Ryan being carried by a couple of soldiers. "Son of a bitch."

She lead them into the mess which was the closest building to them. Clearing off a table, they put Ryan down and she was able to see where the wound was. The shoulder, close to the collar bone. She grabbed Roo's hand and pushed it onto the wound. "Keep the pressure on. Where's Eugene?"

"We hadn't finished the exercise. I sent Malarkey and Bull to find the others." Dick said from behind her.

She turned and looked at Dick. "Well," she could hear Ryan breathing in pain, "how the hell did this happen? This is an exercise, you're not supposed to try and kill each other!"

One of the replacements, whom she didn't know his name, stepped forward. "I-I'm sorry, ma'm." He stammered. "The bayonet. I-I..." She could feel the anger growing as it filled her body tensed. Her breathing became shallow.

"What. What?! You thought you should run around with the fucking bayonet attached to your rifle? In an exercise for christ's sake? What kind of stupid little moron are you? Did they just find you on the side of the road?"

Dick put his hand on her shoulder. "Sarah, don't."

"Don't what, Captain." She made sure she put particular emphasis on that last word. "It is about time someone around here told you Easy boys to get your shit together. 'Cause as far as I can tell, you sure as hell ain't man enough to do it." She glared at Dick.

She turned her back on Dick and knelt into Ryan. "How you doing, mate?"

"Just a graze, my friend."

She snorted. "Yeah looks that way. Son of a bitch. You're back for two days and look at what you did to yourself." She looked at the blood seeping out from underneath Roo's hand, and dripping onto the table. She put her hand on Roo's back and leaned into him.

At that point a doctor burst into the room with a nurse, and Nixon wasn't too far behind. She stepped away from the table with Roo, whose tough hand had been replaced by the soft hand of the nurse. And she watched. Her body still full of rage, she felt Roo's arm around her shoulder. "Saz, he's just a kid. He didn't meant to do it."

She looked at Roo. "I know. But what will we do without Ryan?"

* * *

Dick watched on as the doctor worked on Captain Ryan. He looked at Sarah, who was leaning on Sergeant Clarke, and grimaced. He really hadn't expected the reaction she had gotten. That said though, it was clear that she was very close to Captain Ryan. _And Sergeant Clarke?_

The way she was standing, leaning into Sergeant Clarke, who in turn had his arm around her shoulder, made Dick feel peculiar. He shook his head. _Enough_.

He turned to the men who were still in the mess. "Alright, boys. I need you to form up into your platoons and join Sergeant Malarkey and Sergeant Randleman in rounding up the rest of the boys. Once they are all back on base and accounted for, you are dismissed for the rest of the night."

The boys shuffled their way quietly out of the mess. Nix came up behind him and looked at him curiously. "You alright there, Dick?"

"Mm," was his only answer.

"She'll calm down."

Dick looked up at Nix, and secretly damned him for knowing him too well. "Lieutenant Price? Oh, I'm not too worried about that."

"Sure, Dick, sure."

At that point the Doctor turned to Dick and Nix, and asked for their assistance in carrying Captain Ryan to the hospital. "Roo, can you instead help Nix." Sarah interrupted. The two of them put Ryan across onto a stretcher, and carried him out of the room.

Sarah turned to Dick. Outwardly she looked relatively calm, but he could see in her eyes that she was still full of rage. "Look, I'm sorry. Easy is a great company, otherwise we wouldn't have been attached to you."

"It's fine, I –"

"Sorry, I need to go."

Despite her clearly still being angry, Dick was surprised at the brush off. In fact, he had to admit that he felt a little bit hurt by it. _When that woman wants to sting, she knows how to do it._

_

* * *

_

Eindhoven craziness next! Does Sarah get herself into boy trouble? Just you wait and see!


	5. VAT 69, Beer and Sticky Situations

I once again, broke this chapter up because of length. Meaning chapters 4-6 were all originally part of one chapter plan! In any case, you will soon see why. Let me know what you think!

* * *

**Chapter Five: VAT 69, Beer, and Sticky Situations**

_**Aldbourne, September 12**__**th**__** 1944**_

It had been two weeks since Captain Ryan had been wounded during the exercise. The replacement in question had been assigned to Fox Company. Colonel Sink had thought it best to reassign the soldier after both the boys from Easy and some of the troopers had cornered him one night and things had gotten a bit ugly.

Dick had not seen much of Lieutenant Price lately. He didn't think that she was avoiding him, but she had definitely been quieter since that night. Nix had of course thought it was his place to make a few comments about it. "You've grown a bit attached to her, haven't you?" his words were. And, as always, Nix was right. Dick really felt it.

It hadn't helped at all that Ryan being wounded meant that he was unlikely to join them on the next drop. Which left the problem as to who who be in command of the troopers. Dick felt that Sarah should do it, as she was clearly capable, but that decision from headquarters hadn't come through yet. _I hope that they don't second guess her ability because she is a woman_.

It was a Friday night, and the boys were celebrating the end of the week. The step up in training and lectures had made some of them suspicious that a jump was going to be happening soon, and they were right. Earlier that evening Nix had been at an intelligence briefing where they were told about the jump, which had been scheduled to happen in just over a week. Nix had, of course, told Dick.

Dick was sitting outside the pub when he saw Nix and Sarah wandering up, laughing and slapping each other on the back. Stumbling along, they both looked flushed. "Captain!" Nix called out, with Sarah doing a mock salute. Dick grinned at the sight of the two of them.

"You two as if you have had a busy night."

"The empty bottle of VAT 69 in my room is a testament to that, my friend."

Dick looked at them in disbelief. "The whole bottle? You guys drank the whole bottle?" _That explains why they're so drunk_. He looked at Sarah who, for the first time since he sat with her watching the sunrise, looked completely relaxed.

"Roo helped as well." Sarah said to Dick, with a big grin on her face. _That would explain why he walked past me looking extraordinarily happy with himself earlier._ "Besides, Nixon here thought some liquor might make me..." she turned to Nixon. "Wait, how was it that you and Roo described me?"

"Well, I believe it was that while you had great pins, and were a real dish, you're ability to cut down any man with your icy cold stare had recently been blowing down your own men lately, and so a stiff drink or three was in order to melt it."

Dick burst out laughing.

"Oh what? So do you agree with them do you?" Sarah said between laughs.

"I think this is my queue to get inside the pub and join Roo in some more drinking." Nixon slapped Dick on the back and laughed again. "You know, before it gets dangerous."

Dick watched with great amusement as Sarah plopped herself down onto the bench next to him, folding her legs. She gave him a shy little grin. "I'm sorry for not talking to you." _Oh? So she was avoiding me._ "I was embarrassed. I shouldn't have yelled at you."

"Don't worry, maybe you had a point."

She looked at Dick. "No, please don't say that." She grabbed his hand and squeezed it. "You're a wonderful leader, and I'm a hot head. Don't say that."

Dick stared at her hand. It was weathered, but the long fingers displayed a femininity that Sarah so clearly tried to hide away. _She shouldn't_.

"I received word a couple of hours ago that I'll be commanding the troopers for the next jump. Hence the need for some stiff alcohol." She leaned into him. "Mind you, I think it was just an excuse for Nix and Roo to have a smell from the barrel, as they say."

He chuckled. She was so relaxed, and it was a sight to behold. He had to correct his thoughts from earlier. She was far more relaxed than she had been that morning. That morning she was still guarded in some way. But tonight, she was relaxed, funny, and charming. _Maybe this is her true self once you strip the weather of war from her_.

"Well, I'm going to go have myself a drink."

"Are you sure you need any more?" Dick couldn't help but feel a little concern at the fact that she was clearly already quite drunk.

She laughed. "You're sweet. But this is likely to be my last chance to let my hair down for a while. Might as well take advantage of it while I can!"

As Sarah got up she stepped on Dick's foot. Before he could say anything she wobbled and fell forward towards him. He put his arms out to grab her but it was too late. She kept on falling, and in the course of attempting to steady herself, wound up crashing into the bench and onto the Dick's lap in a heap.

Sarah started laughing hysterically, and Dick couldn't help but join in. She looked gorgeous, giggling in a heap. As she was laughing, he became increasingly aware of how she was placed. In a heap on top of him, with her face was just a couple of inches from his. Her laughter trailed off, and he looked her in the eye. _She realises as well._

His breathing slowed, but his heartbeat was still thumping in his chest. He felt her breath on his cheek. He took in her facial features. Those eyes. Those lips. He saw a small smile on her face, as she searched his eyes. She leaned forward ever so slightly, and he felt her nose touch his. _So close._

A huge crash followed by a room full of laughter broke the moment. Sarah twisted her head and looked at the pub door, and Dick did the same. When they returned to look at each other, Dick immediately felt extremely awkward and inappropriate. He grabbed Sarah's hand and helped her untangle herself, helping her stand up from the bench in the process. She stood up close to him and he could feel the warmth radiating from her body. Shuffling her feet she gave him an awkward grin, and pointed in the direction of the pub.

"Ah, you coming in for a drink?"

"No, I think I'll pass. But ah, thanks."

Dick watched as Sarah walked into the pub. Nixon was right, it did get dangerous. What was he thinking? He shook his head. _That woman makes me crazy._

_

* * *

_

As Sarah walked towards the pub door, she had the urge to turn back and sit back down with Dick. But she knew that that could be dangerous. _Could be? After that wee moment, don't you mean will be?_ She damned alcohol and thanked the lord that tonight would be the last night that she'd be anywhere near the stuff for awhile.

The fact that she was suddenly completely confused by her feelings for Dick meant that heading into the pub, with its noise and laughter was just what she needed. _I'll think about it tomorrow. Tomorrow, when I have the hangover from hell_. The clanging of beer glasses, thumps on tables, and scores of laughter will drown out her thoughts. She hoped. _Or the alcohol will make you into even more of a man-eater._ She swore at herself and pushed the thoughts out of her mind. _Not now._

She walked into the room and immediately spotted Bill, who looked like he was having fun torturing some replacements. Bull looked at her and she gave him a grin in return. He looked at Bill, then back at her, and shrugged his shoulders.

She continued to look around the room and saw Carwood Lipton in he corner. Even though she had only known him for a short time, Sarah had always found him to be very supportive and hard-working. The kind of man she respected. She navigated around the numerous soldiers who were stuffed into the room and over to Lip, who was talking to Smokey.

"Evening, Sarah."

"Evening boys," she said with a smile. "What's going on? You're all huddled up in this corner like a football team working out the winning play."

Smokey gave Lip a slap on the back. "Lip here has been promoted to First Sergeant."

"Wow Lip, that's fantastic! It's well deserved."

"Thanks," Lip gave her a shy, modest smile. "Have you heard about what will be happening on your end yet?"

She sighed. "Ah, yeah." Scratching her head, she looked up at Lip and Smokey. "You're looking at the new CO for the Air troop of B Squadron, 1st Regiment Commonwealth Special Forces."

"That's quite the mouthful." Smokey laughed. "But congratulations. Do the boys know?" He motioned towards the men in the room.

"No, not yet. I can't say I'm entirely sure how you make an announcement like that."

"Oh, I reckon I could fix that," Smokey said. Sarah looked at him with a confused look on her face. She looked at Lip who just shrugged at her.

"Smokey, what are you up to–" She was interrupted when she heard chanting behind her and turned to see Nix and Roo engaged in some kind of drinking contest. She raised her eyebrows. _Lord they are so alike. _She turned back to Lip and Smokey, who both were clearly amused by the shenanigans. "If you'll excuse me, I need to get a couple of boys into line with my icy cold stare." She gave Smokey and Lip a wink.

Walking up to Roo and Nix she slapped them both on the back. "How are we going, boys? Haven't managed to get yourself into too much trouble while I was away, have you?"

"Hey now, I'll have you know that when I came in I saved Roo here from getting into trouble with the locals."

"Oh did you now –" she started.

"– hey, that's not true!" Roo looked at Nixon. "I was almost in with a place to stay for the night, and then this one came up and ruined it all."

"You're twisting the story I think, Sergeant Clarke. It was more like –"

"Hey y'all, listen up!" Sarah turned in the direction of the voice. It was Smokey. "I got us an announcement to make. Firstly, there is a woman in here who I've been told has quite the icy cold stare..."

_Oh god._ She heard Luz whistle loudly, accompanied by a horde of laughter and applause from the men.

"... which we should all watch out for now that she is the new CO of our special forces friends."

"Ain't nothing like a woman in power!" Roo roared, giving Sarah a squeeze around the shoulders.

Smokey then leaned over and grabbed Lip by the shoulders. "And this here is Carwood Lipton."

"He's already married, Smokey", Malarkey yelled out. Sarah joined in on the laughter.

"This here is Carwood Lipton, the new Easy Company First Sergeant!" Everyone gave him a round of applause and a few whistles. Lip remained modest, and gave them all a nod. "As befitting his position, he says he has to make an announcement."

Lip stepped forward and cleared his throat. "Well, I hate to break the mood here, boys but ah," he gave a slight grimace, "we're moving out again." He gave them all a nod and then walked away.

Immediately the jovial atmosphere in the pub was lost. Sarah looked up and caught the eye of Bill. She walked over to him. "Lieutenant."

"Sergeant." She grinned at him, and leaned into a beam. She looked around at the others. "How has you're night been?"

"Fairly productive. Buck and I managed to win a couple of packs of smokes." Luz grinned at her. He put on a voice. "In fact, my lady, I believe that –"

Sarah was distracted by a conversation taking place behind her. She looked at Bill and turned her ear to hear the end of a comment that was clearly directed at her ability to lead a group of soldiers. Her eyes narrowed, but before she could say anything, Bill had walked over to the soldier, put his foot up on the stool, and stuck his face no more than an inch away from the replacement's.

"Lieutenant Price has been killing Krauts long before your ink was dry. It would pay to remember that, or you might find yourself in some trouble." The replacement looked around to see a handful of Easy NCO's staring down at him. He said nothing, but sheepishly turned away.

Sarah leaned back and looked around at the Easy boys, who were all having a chuckle at Bill. "So," she flashed them all a big smile, "who is buying me my next pint?"

* * *

Oh dear, it was mentioned earlier that alcohol was a bit dangerous for her! FYI if you're unsure of the slang in this chapter, just give it a google!


	6. Distractions

Last chapter of the three-part mega chapter! Enjoy.

* * *

**Chapter Six: Distractions**

_**Aldbourne, September 13**__**th**__**, 1944.**_

Sarah woke up the next morning feeling like she had been run over by a tank. She could feel that she was completely tangled up in the blankets, but the throbbing in her head made her want to stay as still as possible. _Oh lord what did I get up to last night?_

She scanned her memory to try and fill in the blanks. Drinking with Nix and Roo. Drinking with Nix. Drinking with Bill. Drinking with Lip and Smokey. Drinking with Bull, Buck and Luz. And Malarkey. Drinking, drinking, drinking._ What am I forgetting?_ An announcement._ We're moving out today? Oh crap, we're moving out today!_ She sat up quickly, and immediately regretted doing so. Putting her hand to her temple, she cracked open an eye and saw that it was barely light outside. _Well, at least I haven't slept in._

She grabbed a glass from her bedside table, and stumbled into the bathroom, filling the glass up with water. After sculling back a few glasses she opened her eyes and looked at the mirror. _That's not a pretty sight._ Turning on the shower, she undressed and sat at the bottom, enjoying the water cascading over her body. She had a niggling feeling that she was still forgetting something about the night. _What was it?_

After a few minutes, she made herself get out of the shower before she fell asleep in it. Fresh, clean, and smelling like jasmine, she felt one hundred times better. She was halfway through getting dressed when she heard a knock on the door. "Come in."

In entered Roo, who looked far worse than her. She was secretly quite happy about this. She had a small chuckle. "Aren't you chirpy this morning?" Roo just looked at her and frowned.

"Remind me never to drink with Lieutenant Nixon again. I never thought I would ever find someone who could drink more than me. But I officially met my match last night."

"You boys were having quite a bit of fun."

"I didn't say I regretted it, Saz." He sat down next to her. "Besides, you can talk. You were working that room better than I've ever seen. I forget how much you break loose when you drink. Hearts were breaking all around the room, I tell you." He flopped back onto the bed.

_Hearts breaking. Men. Drinking. Flirting? _She suddenly sat up straight. "Oh dear god." She looked at Roo. "Did I say anything to you about Winters last night?"

Roo looked at her oddly. "No. Why?"

She stood up and started pacing. "Oh god. Oh crap."

"Saz, what did you do?" Roo slowly sat up and stared at her. His face lit up in surprise. "Holy crap! You made a move on him, didn't you?"

"No! Not really. Oh god, I don't know. I don't think so!"

"Son of a bitch. I've gotten drunk with you heaps of times and you've never flattered with me with such attention! I'm thoroughly unimpressed." She glared at him. "To be fair Saz, you always get up to mischief when you get drunk. Well, you might not have gotten into this kind of mischief before, but do you remember that time when we were playing poker, and you–"

"James Clarke, will you shut up? I made a move on Captain Winters! This cannot be happening." She sat down on a chair and rubbed her face with her hands. _Alcohol is not my friend._ "That's it. I just need to not drink alcohol. No more beer, no more VAT 69. I just need to channel some Captain Winters and I'll be fine."

"Channel some Captain Winters? You must have gotten close to him last nig—"

She snapped her head up and looked at Roo. "Didn't I just tell you to shut up?"

* * *

_**Merryfield Airport, September 15**__**th**__**, 1944**_

The last few days had been exceptionally busy. After being laid up in England for almost two months, Dick had to admit that having something to work towards was a nice change of pace, even if it meant going back to war. The change in pace had also been welcomed because it left little time for Dick to think about what happened with Sarah a few days earlier. Whenever he did think about it, he found himself getting more confused and frustrated. He couldn't deny that he was drawn to her. Attracted to her. But it would be a dangerous decision to get involved in the thick of a world war.

It had also helped that with both of them being so busy they had barely seen each other. Of course, whenever they had it was a bit awkward. Luckily none of the men had noticed it. Except Nixon, who naturally felt that he needed to draw it to Dick's attention at every opportunity.

He looked up and noticed that the room was now filled with the Easy Company men and troopers from the Commonwealth Special Forces. Glancing to the side he saw the NCO's, as well as Nix and Sarah. She gave him a small nod and what seemed to be the slightest glimmer of a smile. Taking a deep breath, he turned to address the men.

"Good morning, men. As you can see," he pointed up at the map behind him, "this is called Operation Market Garden. In terms of airborne divisions involved this one's even bigger than Normandy. We're dropping deep into occupied Holland." He stopped to assess the mood in the room.

He then turned to refer back to the map. "The allied objective is to take this road here between Eindhoven and Arnhem, so that two British armoured divisions can move up and toward Arnhem. Our job, is going to be to liberate Eindhoven. Stay there, wait for the tanks."

Turning, he nodded at Sarah who walked past him and took his place. He felt a small flutter as he smelt jasmine as she walked past. Nix had a small grin on his face, and Dick damned his friend once again for knowing him too well.

Sarah began to address the men in the room. "Many of you have been wondering for some time just what the purpose of us troopers accompanying you has been. This operation is it. While intelligence tells us that we should expect little resistance in Holland, experience has also taught us that it pays to be prepared." Dick saw a few nods in the room. "With the amount of resources invested in this operation, Montgomery wants to add some extra clout to some of the paratrooper forces."

Dick admired Sarah as she paced and explained to the men the reasons why the troopers had been attached to Easy. It was impressive. His suspicions of her ability to command a presence were proved invariably correct. She was clearly good at what she did.

"The primary objective of the troopers, once we have completed the jump, will be to provide reconnaissance to Easy Company in order for you all to complete your objectives. Our secondary objective is to provide extra support, particularly with our specialist signallers. We are focusing on ensuring consistent communication with the two British armoured divisions that will be following us into Eindhoven once it is liberated."

Dick felt Nix leave his side and he soon after joined Sarah in front of the men. He watched as Sarah took one last moment to look around the room, as if attempting to remember all of the men's faces, before leaving Nix. She came and stood next to Dick. _Why does she have to smell so good?_ He damned her for being the one woman in all of the Commonwealth who was both strong and feminine all at the same time.

The change in the tone of the voice of Nix indicated to Dick that he was just about at the end of the briefing. "In any case, say goodbye to England. I don't think they're going to call this one one off." The faces of the men couldn't disguise their apprehension. "Also, this afternoon will be your last chance to send any mail home. Make sure you get it in before the end of the day. You can go."

At the mention of mail Dick had felt Sarah tense up next to him. He could see that Sergeant Clarke had appeared at her side. They were whispering, but their body language suggested to Dick that they were having an argument. He continued to stand there, and despite it being unethical, his concern for Sarah saw him proceed to eavesdrop on their conversation.

"You need to send them something." "It's not as easy as it sounds." "It's writing, how hard can it be?" "Don't belittle me, Roo." "Saz, what if something happens to you?" "I'll be fine." "Don't be a fucking moron." "For christ's sake, Roo, just back-off already!"

Dick saw Sarah head off outside the tent, with Roo following close behind her. He had to restrain himself from doing the same. _You care about her. If you didn't, you wouldn't want to know what had just upset her._ Dick had to admit it was true. Even so, it was a dangerous revelation, and he was torn as to what to do about it.

* * *

_**Eindhoven, September 17**__**th**__** 1944**_

The liberation of Eindhoven did not go the way that they had expected. Instead of resistance, they found an entire population ready to welcome them with open arms. The men all had fun of course, with women throwing themselves at their feet. Dick normally would not have paid much attention to this, except for one particular sight that he was struggling to push out of his mind.

After the celebrations had begun, Dick had looked across the sea of people to see George Luz turn around and kiss Lieutenant Price. Dick had never before felt such anger, and had found it quite hard to contain. A range of emotions had run through his head. Anger. Embarrassment. Jealousy. At the same time, he was just so frustrated that he cared. Normally so calm and stoic, the appearance of Sarah had caused his emotions to pull him in all sorts of directions.

Yet now, sitting down in a field in the middle of the night, watching her as she laughed with Sergeant Clarke, he couldn't help but admire everything about her. He didn't care that Nixon could tell what he was doing and was making comments to that effect. In fact he was barely paying attention to it. All he could think of was George Luz kissing her, and his inability to do so that night in Aldbourne.

As he watched, Sarah gave Sergeant Clarke a big hug, and then left him with the rest of the troopers. Dick stood up, mumbled something to Nix and followed her. He quickly caught up with her. "Lieutenant Price," he called out quietly.

She stopped and turned. "Yes?"

He looked at her, not knowing what to say._ Dammit, say something!_

"Yeah, seriously Dick I don't have the time to watch you try to get the words out of your mouth." She turned to walk away.

Dick snapped. "Don't you walk away from a superior like that, Lieutenant."

She turned on her heel, and walked to him. "Excuse me?" He could see the anger in her eyes. It matched the way he was feeling.

"The way you were carrying on today was completely inappropriate for a commanding officer. Acting in such a manner in front of the men is one thing, but to do it with one of them is a disgrace. If I ever see anything like that again you'll leave me no choice but to take action." He whispered to her.

He could see her fists were clenched so tight that her knuckles were white. "If you're referring to Luz, I'd say that it is none of your god dammed business. But if we are going to play that game," she stepped closer to him, "why is that any different to the smooch that you got today, Captain?"

_She noticed the kiss from that woman? _Dick was surprised at that. But he was still infuriated by her answer.

"The difference, Lieutenant Price, is that you kissed one of my men. How do you expect to work with them if you keep acting like you are of such easy virtue? Or is that how you manage to keep Sergeant Clarke in check?"

"Sergeant Clarke has saved my life more times than I can remember," she hissed at him, stepping closer once again. "And if you ever say anything false about myself and Sergeant Clarke again, I will rip you apart."

"Fine. Is it how you plan to keep me in line then? That night in Aldbourne makes so much sense now." Their noses were just about touching now.

"I was drunk," Sarah replied, her voice low and full of rage. "What was your excuse that night, Captain?" And with that she stormed off, leaving Dick standing in a heap of frustration and anger.

* * *

I love reviews!


	7. Cracks Begin to Appear

Those who have looked at my profile recently would have seen that I warned that I had a few busy busy weeks coming up, hence no updates on the story. Stuff like moving, exams, assignments (ick!) and then I went away on holiday. So thanks for the patience and I hope you enjoy the newest instalment!

Reviews are, as always, very much appreciated.

* * *

**Chapter 7: Cracks Begin to Appear**

_**Eindhoven, September 17**__**th**__** 1944**_

Out of the corner of his eye Sergeant Clarke became aware of a situation developing between Winters and Saz. Not wanting to draw any more attention to it out of respect for Sarah, he turned away and struck up a conversation with a few of the Easy boys in the hopes that they would not notice.

"Wasn't exactly planning on that welcome today," he said as he threw a lighter over to Bull, who was busy checking every pocket in a fruitless attempt to find his own.

With reflexes as quick as lightning, Bull caught the lighter and grinned at Roo. "Cheers."

"What does that mean for you troopers?" Johnny said. "It ain't like you fellas have had a lot to do."

"It's unclear at this point. Obviously what happened today wasn't anticipated, which would mean that intelligence got it wrong. This would mean that we still have a role to play. What form that would take, I haven't a clue." He looked and noticed an odd look forming on Johnny's face, as he stared into the distance. _Damn, he's noticed Saz and Winters._ He quickly glanced at Bull, who at that point at least, was concentrating more on lighting his cigar than the heated conversation taking place behind him.

"A recce or two wouldn't go astray," Bull piped up, cigar protruding out of the side of his mouth.

"True, I guess in the morning Lieutenant Price will let us all know what the next step is."

"That's if she isn't otherwise engaged." Bull motioned into the distance, behind Roo.

Roo cringed. He didn't want to look. The respect he had for Saz told him that he shouldn't, and every ounce of his being wanted to protect her from the prying eyes of the men, but he knew it was too late for that. What he needed to do now, was to find out what was happening. And to do that, he needed to turn, and face what was going on behind him.

He saw Saz and Winters standing nose to nose. Bar the obvious hissing, anyone would have looked and thought they were about to fall into each other's arms in a mad heap of passion. Of course, he knew that that wasn't exactly far from the truth.

While Saz would insist that the near miss (or kiss, as he would prefer to put it) with Winters was the result of her drunken ways, he knew her better than that. For all of the bravado she served up; for all of the jokes; he knew it was just a mask. Because he had seen what was under it. And for her to have come that close to kissing Winters, it meant that she trusted him. Trusting him meant that at some point she had unmasked herself.

Unfortunately that also meant that no matter how much he wanted to go over there and smash the man right on the nose for even thinking about touching her, it would be a rookie move. Because he knew Saz.

He watched as she took a step closer to Winters, almost feeling the heat from her rage despite standing 10 yards from her. And then, almost as quickly as it started, she had turned on her heel and stormed away, leaving a very angry Captain Winters in her dust. He wanted to follow her, but he knew better than that. He pitied any man that got in her way tonight.

When she had cooled off though, he knew he had to talk to her. And not just about tonight, but about the last few months. Ever since her brother had died, the change in her had been so slight, but it was enough for him to notice. Lieutenant Hera Parihe, the epitome of how strong Maori women were supposed to be, was slowly falling apart.

* * *

_**East of Nuenen, 19**__**th**__** September 1944**_

Sarah hadn't slept very well the last couple of nights. She had instead opted to spend one night thinking of creative ways to destroy Captain Winters. The next night she was still fired up, and so she spent it planning the trooper's movements. Luckily she had already been briefed before her run-in with Captain Winters a couple of nights earlier.

For the most part, the Operation had gone smoothly thus far. There had been some flak on the way in, but it was a lot less concentrated that what intelligence had originally indicated. This had raised suspicion amongst the men, and definitely with herself.

As the whole Operation was still under British Command, they were being sent north east towards a small town called Nuenen. Because of the suspicion, the troopers had been sent ahead of Easy Company that morning to do a recce of the outlying areas of the town.

It was a quiet, breezy day. But the quiet was unsettling. They troopers had moved in from the east, slowly making their way through the fields. During the whole morning they had found it difficult to track any movements around the town simply because of the fact that it was clear that there had been many. And some were fresh. That was dangerous.

Sarah had sent Mouse and his fireteam ahead of the rest of the troopers some time earlier, as she had been concerned that if there were German units ahead that such a large group of them would catch their attention. She left a trooper on sentry and returned to the rest of the men.

She was peering at her map when Roo came up beside her. "The sentry has spotted Mouse and his fireteam heading back to our location."

She nodded and continued looking at the map. "What are you looking for?" Roo asked her.

"I'm just attempting to calculate in my head what the best route would be to link back up with Easy. We're a bit exposed here: case in point the fact that Johnson was able to spot Mouse heading back to our location."

"Good point. I'm glad you're in charge."

She snorted. "Only because you're ability to make decisions is non-existent." She looked up and grinned at him. "But seriously, I think Easy probably isn't too far away from us." She glanced in the direction of a small bend in the distance. "In fact, I'd put money on the fact that in a few minutes they'll be rounding that corner."

"Only a foolish man would take up that bet."

She folded the map and put it in her pocket. "Roo, can you liaise with Westley and get a report on his communications with Easy about the tracks we've found? In the meantime I'm going to hear Mouse's report," she nodded east towards the incoming troopers, "about the results of his recce."

Picking up her rifle, she moved out of the core of the troopers and found cover just behind the sentry on the side of the banks of the road. She noticed that Easy Company was now heading in on the road to the South. She raised her eyebrows at Roo and grinned.

When Mouse arrived, she sent his fireteam to join the rest of the troopers. "What's the situation?"

"There sure as hell ain't young boys and old men in that town. We couldn't get too close because there are a number of them holed up in the buildings. They're concentrated in the buildings on the north west side of the town. Strong likelihood of armoured vehicles, there are fresh tracks leading right into the town."

She looked to the South and noticed that Easy and the British had stopped. "Fuck." In a rush she grabbed her rifle and kept low, moving as fast as she could towards Roo and the Signaller, Westley. "Report from Lieutenant Price: German Infantry in the town, unknown number, situated in buildings to the north west, exercise extreme caution." She patted Westley on the back and turned to Roo.

"Roo, take your section and link up with Easy."

She turned to the men and signalled to them. Keep low. Hold position.

A shot echoed through the air and she saw someone fall in distance. Shouting. Easy dispersed quickly. Above her she heard the roar of German armour coming past. _Shit, too late._

She signalled again. Keep low. The tanks took their shot. Miss. She heard the second shot. It connected.

"Contact! Fire at will!"

While the troopers cleared the east path into town, she watched the movements of Easy Company and quickly assessed the situation. The men were advancing to the north, and taking up positions on the south side of town. The tanks would have to advance into the town from the east. The troopers needed to protect that path.

They moved swiftly to the east, taking out stray German's along the way. They took up position behind a church. "Keep low."

Sarah slid down the wall of the church and covertly looked around the corner. There, she saw Johnny and Heffron heading towards the British, who were now a distance away from them. Johnny spotted her and a brief look of surprise crossed his face. She turned back to the troopers. "Fireteam alpha, form up and follow me. The rest of you provide covering fire until we're clear, and then you're under Mouse."

She grabbed her rifle, knelt, and swung the barrel of the weapon around the corner. With short, sharp movements, she quickly assessed their route. Clear. She swung her rifle on her shoulder, and motioned forward. She ran quickly and could hear the footsteps of the men behind her as they travelled up the road, ducking in and out of clearings.

Eventually they found themselves directly opposite Johnny and Heffron, who had just finished liaising with the British armoured units. A look of exasperation was plastered all over Johnny's face. She cocked her head at him in a questioning manner. His hand signals spelt it out pretty clearly. The morons were walking into an ambush willingly.

_Fuck_.

She signalled to her men. Follow me. They needed to link back with Easy because this was going to get very bad, very quickly. They moved stealthily down the street, using the tanks as a source of cover. At the next opportune moment she led the men down the side of a building, ensuring their cover was kept. It was here that they met Guarnere and second platoon.

"The Bri—"

Before she could say anything else a sound loud enough to splinter her bones into pieces struck. A sudden burst of heat. The trap had been sprung.

"Fall back!" Shouts filled the air. She turned and motioned to her troopers, and they moved quickly, covering the rear of the retreat. She was following suit when an explosion sounded and she found herself in the air.

She landed straight on her back, and it took the wind out of her. She struggled to take a breath. _Hhuccm. Hhuuuucm. _Her head pounded. _No time for this, Price. Get up._ Hauling herself up she saw that she had narrowly missed being flattened by the side of a building which had been hit by a shell from the Germans. She could see that she was now stuck, and the only way out was to reveal herself on the main road. That would make her a prime target.

_Son of a bitch._

In a couple of minutes at most the area would be crawling with German's. She didn't have long. She edged herself toward the corner of the now half-destroyed building and saw no clear routes. She was trapped.

_Think Price, think!_ She looked down and saw her grenades dangling off her. The next thought she had was possibly one of the most audacious she had ever had in her military career. But, it just might work.

* * *

Roo and the rest of the section had made it back to the trucks quickly. But there was no Sarah. He turned and caught Captain Winters' eye, but then saw further in the distance a small group of troopers retreating in behind an Easy platoon. It took him two seconds to see that the familiar shape of Saz wasn't among them.

Rearming himself with his rifle, he launched forward towards them. As he passed Captain Winters, he heard, "Where is Lieutenant Price?"

He quickly answered. "I'm about to find out."

He advanced forward and kept low. He saw Luz coming towards him. "Where's Lieutenant Price?"

"I was about to ask you the same thing. Her fireteam is behind you."

Luz spun around. "Goddamn. You, where is your Lieutenant?"

A trooper answered, "She was behind us, but there was an explosion, and half the building came down." The trooper pointed from where they came from. "We couldn't see her. We needed to cover the retreat of second platoon."

_Fuck. Those morons don't have a slice of heroism in them._

"Get on the fucking truck."

"What are you doing?" Luz said to Roo.

"I'm getting Lieutenant Price." He sprinted forward, dodging the retreating Easy Company. He was well aware of the stares he was getting from them all, but he didn't care. Even if it meant identifying the damn body, he had to go back for her.

He reached the buildings within a minute. He could thank the adrenalin for that. To the east he spotted the building the trooper had pointed towards. It was decimated. _Would she have survived?_ As he was about to make a move towards the building, he spotted Lieutenant Price through the rubble. She was moving very slowly, but her rifle was slung over her shoulder. _What the hell is she doing?_

Looking slightly to the right of her, he saw that her most direct route towards him and Easy was also crawling with German infantry who were using an armoured vehicle as cover. He looked back at her. There was a grenade in her hand. Her arm moved. It was released. It exploded right by the tank, alerting the German's to her presence. _What the hell is she doing?!_

When he looked back to her position, she was gone. And then he saw another explosion, before she appeared out of the dust and was sprinting straight towards him. He swung the barrel of his gun towards her position and gave covering fire. One. Two. Three. _Hurry Saz, I can't keep this up for much longer._ Four.

She was almost to him. "Run!" She yelled. He moved in behind her, running on her heels. They climbed up the bank to the road, but she stumbled as she got to the top. He heard her grunt in pain and fall to her knees. With no time to waste, he put his arm under her shoulder and hauled her up to her feet. With him supporting her, they attempted to slowly make their way towards the trucks.

Looking up he saw Captain Winters coming towards them. Saying nothing, Winters put his arm around Saz's back, and placed her arm over his shoulders. Between Roo and Winters, they made up the rest of the ground quickly, putting Saz on the back of a truck. He put pressure on the wound on her leg as the truck began to pull away. Looking back, he nodded at Winters.

He turned back to Sarah, who was unconscious. He checked her pulse. Normal. Stroking her hair, he frowned. _Saz, what on earth were you thinking?_

* * *

Thanks for reading! Constructive feedback is most appreciated.


	8. That Dull Ache

Thank you all for the reviews and for reading! I have secretly spent some time this week writing parts of an upcoming chapter, as I wanted to get it out of my head an onto paper. So fun times coming up.

FYI if you have any questions about the Māori in this chapter let me know. I've tried to stick to words that are either the transliteration of an English word, or words whose meanings should be easily guessed.

Anywho, enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter Eight: That Dull Ache**

Sarah did not feel very good. There was a sharp pain in her leg, but most of all her head was pounding. The rumbling of the truck as it roared down the dirt road didn't help. Neither did the sound of voices. Despite the noise, she was struggling to keep her eyes open. A dull thud behind her eyes. So tired...

"_P__ā__p__ā?" Her feet pounded the ground as she sprinted across the paddock towards her father. "__P__ā__p__ā!" She saw him wave out to her and she grinned, sprinting harder._

"_Kia ora Hera!"_

_She ran up to him and hugged his legs. Looking up at him, she grinned, and then spotted the sack in his hand. "What are you doing?"_

"_I'm getting some watercress for dinner. Do you want to help me?"_

_She nodded. He held her hand, and they walked through the paddock towards the creek. __"P__ā__p__ā, am I allowed to help you?"_

"_Of course you are! I just said you could, didn't I?" He patted her softly on the head._

"_Yes, but..." she frowned, "Wiremu said that girls aren't allowed to do boy stuff. He said all we are supposed to do is have babies and cook."_ _She looked up at her father. "But that's boring! Are you going to stop me going hunting with you?"_

"_Wiremu is a fool, Hera. __M__ā__ori women are strong." __Her father chuckled, and knelt down to look at her. "__When I am away, who is it that looks after the animals?"_

"_M__ā__m__ā."_

"_And who is it that helps me gut pigs?"_

"_...M__ā__m__ā."_

"_And who is it that always goes to the school to tell the t__eachers off for being too hard on your brother?"_

"_M__ā__m__ā." She then leaned in to her father and whispered, "but he is naughty."_

_He laughed loudly. "Yes, he is. And who is it that sends him out to the gate after dinner to get punished?"_

"_M__ā__m__ā!"_

"_You are strong just like your m__ā__m__ā, and as a __M__ā__ori woman you need to be. Life will be hard for you, my __tamāhine, but it will be full." He leaned in and gave her a hug._

_Standing up, he picked up the sack and started to walk towards the creek. Then he stopped, and turned back to face her. "P__romise me you'll never have babies and cook for Wiremu, okay?"_

_She screwed up her face. "P__ā__p__ā! I won't do that." She put her hands on her hips matter-of-factly. "Boys are gross!"_

Sarah felt a jolt. A bump. Her head hit something solid."Gohmjammid." _That didn't sound right. _Another jolt. "Goddammit!"

She cracked open an eye, and was blinded by the light of the sun. Close. They stopped. Her back ground against the wood of the truck. Boots stepping around her. "Saz, we have to move you now."

"No."

A hand touched her shoulder. "Please?"

"No!"

She heard a sigh. And then a voice in the background. A changing of weight in the back of the truck. "Lieutenant Price, Roe needs to take a look at you. You're wounded."

"I'm quite comfortable here, thank you. Besides, if I came along with you, would you not think me of easy virtue?" She opened her eyes and looked at the offending officer. Surprisingly, she saw a smirk on his face.

"I don't think you understand, Lieutenant. I'm not asking."

She sighed. She wasn't going to win this one. "Fine. But only because I'm hungry."

With the help of Dick and Roo, she sat up and got off the truck. She stumbled. She felt so woozy; her head felt like it had been split open and filled with a million pounds of gunpowder. A fizz in her stomach. She couldn't hold her eyes steady. Her hands flung out to try and grab something to balance herself; they found a pair of hands, solid, strong, and unwavering. "Oh god." She fell to the ground, and her stomach heaved.

She felt so disgusting, drool smeared all over her face, chin, and fingers. The dizziness overtook her, and her stomach kept heaving. The snot joined the vomit and drool in a pool on the ground. She felt Roo's hand kneading her lower back. The nausea began to diminish, and she wiped the tears out of her eyes with the back of her hand. She pulled her bloodied shirt up and used that to wipe away spittle and bile from her face.

Realising that there were boots in front of her, she looked up and saw Roo. Confused, she turned her head and saw Dick to her side. Sarah connected the dots and realised that it had been Dick rubbing her back. She gave him a small smile of thanks.

Roo stepped forward, leaned down, and grabbed her underneath the arms in order to pull her up.

"I'm fine, I can do it."

"Yeah it shows." He motioned to mess on the ground. "Don't kid yourself."

"I'm not a child."

"No, but you are wounded." His eyes bore into her. She turned to Dick, but saw no sympathy in his eyes. She went to take a step, but was stopped by Dick, who shook his head at her. Frustrated, she turned to see Roo behind her. "You're not getting away from us that easily."

Defeated, her shoulders slumped. Obviously recognising that as a sign of resignation, Roo bent at the knees and picked her up, cradling her in his arms. Feeling him pulling her close, she decided the only way to not look like a damsel in distress was to pretend to be asleep. Just as she went to close her eyes and hide her face in his chest, she caught Dick's eye. His expression was a mix of concern, and amusement. Sarah thought she could see something else, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it. Frowning, she put her best asleep face on and let Roo carry her to Roe.

* * *

Roo left her with Eugene, who had been very gentle in patching up the wound on her leg. "You're lucky, Lieutenant. One inch over, and it would be a different story."

"Hm, I guess I am." She looked up to see him staring at her bloodied shirt. She sighed. "I think I have a few cuts."

"Well, they look like they have bled quite a lot. I'm going to have to take a look at them."

Despite having accepted a long time ago that being surrounded by men meant that she had to get over any sense of modesty, she still wasn't overly comfortable with having to take her shirt off in front of them all to get her wounds cleaned. However, after the earlier exchange with Dick and Roo, she knew that she wouldn't get away with any alternative. _When those two team up, I don't have a hope in hell._

"Okay." She started unbuttoning her shirt. "I think the worst ones are on my back. That's where I landed."

She changed positions so her back was facing Roo, and she dropped the shirt down.

"How did you say you got these again, Lieutenant?" Eugene said, as he gently wiped the cuts.

"One of the German's shells connected with a building I was standing next to. It sent me flying." She shrugged.

She felt another presence behind her. "Lieutenant Price. I heard you was over here."

Bill. She smiled. "You heard?"

"A woman with her shirt off isn't exactly something they'd all miss."

"You're joking right? Yes, I have my shirt off, but my back is covered in cuts and blood!"

"Yes. And?" She heard Bill chuckle. He appeared next to her. His face was as hard as steel. She felt her face screw up in puzzlement. "Did you see Bull at all when you were retreating back to the trucks?"

"Bull?" She thought back to earlier that day. Her movements. No she didn't see Bull. Shaking her head, she answered. "No, I didn't see anything. Why?"

"He's missing."

_Oh no._ She looked up at Bill. They stared at each other for a few seconds, before a sharp pain in Sarah's back made her grimace and look away.

"Sorry, Lieutenant, I'm going to need to put a couple of stitches in this one."

"Sure."

She looked up to see Bill gone.

_Bull. He can't possibly have been killed. He is one of the best in Easy._ She thought hard about what had happened. She was stuck. She had limited options. There was no way she was going to wait for the Germans to find her. Being an officer of a Special Forces Unit, there was no way she would be treated kindly. She could have attempted to get through the rubble of the building, but that would have been too slow. And so she chose the craziest, riskiest option. _The less standard option will surprise them,_ she had told herself_._ Rifle slung over her shoulder, she had a grenade in each hand. _Throw it, draw them out. Throw again. Time it right. Run. Fast._ Stupidest idea ever. But it had worked.

It was only a couple of minutes, and it was all a blur. But she knew one thing, she didn't see Bull. She didn't see a body though, either. _There is no way he is dead._

Deep in her thoughts, she hadn't realised that Eugene had finished and she was sitting there all alone. She got the surprise of her life when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Turning, she saw Dick.

"How are you feeling?"

"Much better, thanks." There was an awkward silence. For the first time since she joined the army she felt a wave of modesty come over her, and she quickly pulled her shirt up. Feeling her face turning red, she started buttoning up her shirt. "I suppose you know about Bull."

"Yes. The men want to go back. I'm inclined to agree, but unfortunately the decision really is made for us. There is no way under current circumstances that we can go back." A frown was cemented on his face.

Sarah stared at him and knew that he wasn't convinced by that argument. But she understood. It was hard to lead, when your decisions directly impacted on the lives of those around you. She felt an ache in her belly, and she grabbed his hand.

He looked at her, surprised. She tilted her head, and broke out into a huge smile. He shook his head, almost in disbelief, and then gave her a genuine smile back. "I always knew Shakespeare was a smart guy."

Dick looked at her, a mixture of confusion and amusement on his face.

"A smile cures the wounding of a frown."

* * *

Sarah Price confused the hell out of Dick. One minute he wanted to throttle her; the next he wanted to kiss her all over. All he wanted to do in Nuenen was to join Sergeant Clarke to find her. And he was jealous that Sergeant Clarke's relationship with Sarah meant that he could do that. Could touch her, protect her. When he had carried Sarah to Eugene, Dick had struggled to keep that knowing pang of jealously at bay.

And after all that he had said, here she was, offering him a smile and a quote from Shakespeare. He shook his head. How could he treat her so badly? _I need to make this right._

"Lieutenant Price, I need to apologise to you." He saw her face turn to steel. She was clearly recalling the exchange in Eindhoven. "I should never have questioned your virtue, or your relationship with anyone here. Especially Sergeant Clarke."_ Tell her why you did it. Be a man. Tell her how you feel about her. _

"Dick." She had pulled her hand away. "What you said, was so off the mark. So unfair. I don't understand why you would have said those things."

_I do. Although that doesn't excuse __saying it._

"Do you remember that morning in Aldbourne?"

_How could I forget?_He stared straight into the depth of her gaze.

She sighed. "That morning, I felt relaxed. Free." He watched her intently, feeling the thud of embarrassment and regret. "Do you know 'The Man in the Arena' speech by Teddy Roosevelt?"

He nodded. _How could I not?_

"My father used to read it to me all the time. He was a good man..."

_Was?_

"He taught me that women are strong. That I could do anything. That it was important to try, even if it meant failure. And he used to say to always remember that speech."

_What is she getting at?_

"That morning in Aldbourne, I realised that you were worth taking a risk for."

_Me?_

"That you were someone I wanted to be around. Someone I could trust."

_That__ is what she's getting at._

"Please don't make me regret that."

Dick was completely taken aback. He had insulted her, and her friends. He knew that. But he hadn't realised how deeply his words had penetrated. Her family. Her life. She had chosen to trust him, and he had almost ruined that. Almost. Because here she was, giving him a second chance.

He stepped around in front of her, and knelt so that they were at the same level. "I am truly sorry." His eyes pleaded for her forgiveness.

She looked at him carefully. Whispering quietly, he was barely able to make out what she said. "Friends?"

"Without a doubt." _Thank you. I'll never hurt you again._

_

* * *

_

_**Somewhere in Holland, 28**__**th**__** September 1944**_

With the miraculous return of Bull, the boys in Easy had settled into what was quite the crazy week. The troopers were much the same. However, the majority of their week had been spent in the field, completely isolated from the Easy boys, carrying out objectives that were sporadic, and barely comprehensible. Roo could tell that Sarah was getting annoyed.

Every new objective was more ridiculous than the last. They had had a number of close shaves that week. He knew that Saz didn't want to risk their lives any more than she needed to. And so she was making stupid decisions. Stupid in the sense that he noticed that she was increasingly putting herself the firing line to stop the other men from doing so. Even if she wasn't the specialist needed for a particular assignment. Or if it meant making a change to the structure of a section in order for her to bear the brunt of enemy fire.

To some of the men it probably looked like she just wanted in on the action. But a few of the older ones had spoken to him about their concern for what she was doing. It was quite obvious to them, and to him, that her ability to lead them was faltering. _War is a death sentence. We can't avoid it even if we try._

It had become a common sight to everyone to see Sarah heading over to Eugene every time they returned to get patched up. Bruises, cuts, grazes. She had been very lucky. _It won't last._

He knew that she was alone in her room, writing up a report of the day's recce. Knocking on the door,he entered to see her hunched over the typewriter. She wasn't typing though. "Saz, are you okay?" He moved her chair around to face him. She had been crying.

"I'm fine. Just frustrated. You know, I can't hit anyone, so I'm crying out the punches." She attempted a grin.

He sighed. He could see right through her, and she knew it. "Stop pretending to be okay. I know you're not."

"Seriously, I'm fine."

_Oh for god's sake._ "Right. Being fine means throwing a couple of grenades towards a bunch of Germans, a tank, and making a break for it with them lining you up for the shot."

"It was my only option—"

"—you forget that I was watching the whole thing. You could've navigated through the building. You're trained to assess all the options. You knew that there were others. But you chose to do the riskiest, most nuts thing I think I have ever seen anyone do. And it isn't something to celebrate. Why are you trying so hard to get yourself killed?"

Sarah looked at him, and swallowed. "I don't want to die."

"Why are you doing this to yourself?"

Tears were forming in her eyes. "When I found out my brother was killed, I was devastated." She looked up at him. "I don't want to be the cause of anyone else feeling that way."

_Bingo._ "But you're fine with having your family feel that pain?"

"There is only my mother left. The effect is... lessened."

"Are you hearing yourself? You're trying to justify your own mother's pain."

He could feel her hurt. See the emotions crossing her face. She had tears in her eyes, but her fists were clenched tight. She was conflicted.

"What about us? You think your mother is the only one who would be devastated?"

She looked at him, confused.

_She seriously doesn't think anyone would care if she was gone?_ He leaned forward and cupped her face with his hands. "Saz, I am absolutely head over heels in love with you. You're my best friend. My heart would be mince meat if anything ever happened to you." She just stared at the ground.

_Please believe me. _He tried to catch her eye. He hesitantly leaned in, tilted her face towards his, and then he kissed her. Thoroughly, wanting, needing. He felt her respond, for just a split second, but then she broke away.

It was clear then that her thoughts were with someone else. He loved her, and would protect her with his life, but it could never be that way.

"And I'm not the only one." She looked up at him. "I've seen the way you look at him, Saz. Be honest to yourself." She might not have smiled, but he could see a light appear in her eyes.

"If you're not going to live for me, do it for him."

* * *

Spanner in the works! Whoa, bet you didn't see that one coming! I'm so evil. R&R!

(I swear there is a method to my madness!)

Also, if you aren't sure what the point of the whole 'Man in the Arena' speech is, I suggest you look it up - Theodore Roosevelt - The Man in the Arena (April 23, 1910).


	9. Downfall of a Giant

**Chapter Nine: Downfall of a Giant**

_**The 'Island', 21**__**st**__** October 1944**_

Dick had seen a lot of Lieutenant Price in the last few weeks. Considering that the troopers had been exceptionally busy gathering intelligence, it was actually quite odd. That said, he wasn't complaining, because he enjoyed her company. But she was definitely off, and he was worried about her.

A couple of days after they had been transported to the Island, one of her troopers had died. They had been on the perimeter, and a shot had gone right through the throat of Private Johnson. It completely shredded an artery. What stood out about that night wasn't the blood smeared all over her face and uniform (even though there was a lot of it): it was the look in her eyes. There was just nothing there. No life. No hope. Not even anger. She seemed as dead as the trooper.

That said, even before the death of the trooper she was storming around baring saying a word to anyone. He had attempted to ask Sergeant Clarke about it, but that was quickly shrugged off and avoided. Which left Dick thinking: what had happened between them?

Dick felt a bubble of anger in his stomach. _He better not have done anything to her._ He quickly shook his head. _What do you care? It's not like you have a claim on her._ He sighed. Out of all the things happening around him – explosions, death, _writing these damn reports!_ – she was constantly in his head distracting him. Never before had he struck something, or rather someone, that made his usually stoic self suddenly impulsive and rash. He had managed to catch his thoughts so far. But sooner or later something was going to give. _Would it be that bad if you just let go?_

He leaned back on his chair and looked out the window. _Would it be that bad to not be in control of yourself?_

He thought of Sarah. She was so tall, and regal. The way she carried herself was beyond belief. He had never seen anyone carry themselves with such purpose. He closed his eyes and imagined seeing those long, lean legs of hers bare. _Oh, what I wouldn't give to have those –_

- "Captain Winters."

Zielinski. That damn orderly always got in the way.

"Captain Winters, you need to sign these papers." _Honestly you'd think that he was the one in charge._

Dick nodded and signed the forms that were shoved under his nose. He heard a shuffle of feet. He looked up. Zielinski was still there. He raised his eyebrow. "Yes?"

"Sorry Sir. I wanted to know if that would be all for the evening?"

_He says that like I've wanted him here at all. Well, better to keep the illusion of caring up. _He nodded. "Yes. You're dismissed until 0730."

With the orderly gone, Dick looked up from the pile of papers on his desk. He spotted something on the corner of it. Doing a double take, he realised it was a bacon sandwich, and he chuckled.

Dick looked into the distance. Operation Pegasus was happening this evening. Nix and Moose had been in earlier, and since then he had made sure that he kept note of the time. _1245_. They wouldn't be far off the other side of the Rhine. Dick had questioned the reliability of the intelligence in an exchange with Nix, but he felt quite bad about that. He knew that if Sarah had anything to do with it, that the intelligence this time around would be a lot more solid than when they jumped into Holland just over a month ago. _Old men and young boys. Yeah, that turned out right._

* * *

"_Hey Johnson!"_

"_What?"_

"_I saw a photo of your girl today. You didn't tell me she was such a knockout."_

"_Hey! Where'd you get that? Hand's off."_

_Sarah rolled her eyes at the conversation between the troopers. So typical. Men laying claim to their property. She couldn't help but liken it to a dog pissing on the side of a tree to mark its' territory. She understood that for the most part it was friendly banter, but she couldn't help but feel the tiniest bit sorry for their women back home. She considered herself very lucky to be from New Zealand. Women, including Maori women, won the vote in 1893 – the first in the world. _

_She looked up at the grimy faces, and then back to her own weathered, dirty hands. Yep, those women didn't know what they were missing, she chuckled. The voices got louder._

"_Christ, would you guys shut it?" The troopers looked at her. "As much as I love your conversation, I'm not sure if the Krauts across the river would appreciate it as much as me. Seriously, you're as loud as a couple of elephants mating or something."_

_A grin spread across Johnson's face. "Lieutenant, is there something you should be telling –"_

_She felt something warm and thick splatter onto her face. She looked up, and saw Johnson falling to the ground._

"_Jesus, take cover!"_

_A pool of blood was forming in front of her. She leopard crawled over to Johnson, and turned him over. All she saw was blood glugging out of a hole in his throat. "Fuck – Westley, medic!"_

"_Johnson, stay awake." She quickly ripped a chunk of material off the bottom of her shirt and tied it tightly around his neck. _

"_Look at me mate," she patted his cheek. "Come on, keep your eyes open." She didn't want to move him, but she felt exceptionally exposed where they were, and had no idea where that shot had come from. _

_With one hand fruitlessly applying pressure on his throat, she got on her knees and started pulling Johnson along. Christ. Dead weight. She looked at him. His eyes were closed._

_She heard voices behind her, and then a body moved swiftly past her and grabbed the legs of Johnson. She followed suit by lifting Johnson's body, and together they crashed into the nearest door. Unfortunately this wound up being a meeting room, which was currently in use. _

_With blood smeared all over her hands and face, Johnson was lifted onto the table. Eugene had arrived, and he quickly was opposite her, hands dug into the blood choked throat. _

_She stepped back, watching the scene unfold. But she knew what the result would be. She scratched her head. She leaned to the side, catching herself before she tapped her foot. _

_One look from Eugene confirmed what she had been thinking. Johnson was well dead. _

_She suddenly became aware of the audience they had. Looking around the room, she saw many faces, including Nixon's, whose face was grim at the sight of Johnson lying dead on the table. _

_And then she saw Dick, whose gaze, unlike everyone else's, was firmly transfixed on her. Intense and unblinking; filled with concern. She looked at him and almost felt herself shrug._

_What on earth was wrong with her? _

* * *

Sarah rubbed her temple as she recalled the events of that night. It bugged her to no end how unfeeling she was. _This war is making me lose my humanity._ She shook her head. She could feel herself slipping into a funk, and was grasping at straws to lift herself out of it. And she couldn't exactly talk to anyone about it, because everyone was in the same situation.

The person she would usually talk to in this situation would be Roo, and that was well... difficult, now. She touched her lips, still feeling the presence of his. _Why the hell would he do that?_ She was so angry about it. But she was even angrier that she kissed him back, even if it was for a brief moment. She knew she didn't want that from him, but the comfort in the closeness of it was almost irresistible. _It's because you want it from someone else. Roo knows it, why don't you?_

_Just shut up Price, and do your job._ She took a deep breath in and looked to her side. Moose was sitting next to her, eyes focused on the distance. She smiled. He was a good soldier, and she really admired him. Easy was definitely in good hands. Although, she thought that no one could do any better than Dick, but if there was a suitable replacement, then Moose was definitely it.

She felt a bit exposed tonight because the troopers weren't taking part in the operation. She had been tasked by Colonel Sink to go with Easy because of her first-hand knowledge of the situation. The reasoning was that if something should go astray, having that knowledge directly accessible would be of help. She agreed. But that didn't mean she felt comfortable with it.

Not that Easy was terrible. In fact, she held the men of Easy in a higher regard than some of her own men. But the unfamiliarity of it was disconcerting. The lack of control, almost frightening.

In front of her was Dobie, a Lieutenant Colonel in charge of if the 1st Parachute Battalion of the British Army. Now he had a story. Captured, he escaped, and then volunteered to led and plan this operation. Yet another fine soldier.

A small bump told her that they had reached the shore of the Rhine. Scrambling out, they all moved swiftly but quietly through the last part of the water and onto the shoreline. The only sound was the slightest puff of breath from the soldiers.

She checked the rear as she moved to join with Dobie and Moose. She crouched next to Dobie and nodded at Moose, who was firmly in control of the line.

"So Colonel, where are they?" Moose asked Dobie.

Dobie looked into the bushes. "Leicester."

"Square."

"Come on in."

A British soldier appeared out of the darkness and came running towards them. "Welcome back, Sir."

"It's good to be back."

Moose shook the hand of the soldier. "Heyliger. 506, 101st Airbourne."

The soldier grinned. "Never thought I'd be so glad to see a bloody Yank."

Moose nodded toward her. She put out her hand. "Price. B Squadron, 1st Regiment Commonwealth Special Forces." The soldier raised his eyebrow.

"Impressive. Greeted by a Yank and a woman."

"Your show, Colonel."

"Be back shortly."

She looked at Dobie and grinned. "After you." She took up the rear of the two British soldiers, and gave Moose a wink. "See you soon."

Her movements were timed and perfect. She tracked just behind the Colonel as they moved slowly through the bushes and along the shoreline to the East. It became quickly apparent to her that the British had assembled a bit further of the crossing than originally thought, but it was no matter. There had not been any sign of German presence at this point, and they had no choice but to continue to RV with them.

It wasn't long before the three stopped. "Leicester."

"Square."

Another red beret. She looked at his uniform. Brigadier General. _Nice._

"Sir, this is Lieutenant Price. She is the CO of one of the special commonwealth units," Dobie said. She shook the General's hand.

"It must be odd to hear Lieutenant said the right way." He chuckled.

She grinned. "You'd be right about that. I've spent far too much time with the Yanks, Sir." Looking into the distance, her eyebrows furrowed. "Have you had any contact on the way here? With the villages being emptied, there was some concern that the Krauts knew we were here."

"There was a small exchange earlier in the night with one of the platoons. But I don't think they realise the extent of our presence. Certainly not the strength of yours."

She nodded. Dobie appeared beside her. "We're all here."

"Excellent. Shall we move out then, gentlemen?"

She stood in the back of the room, amidst the noise and celebration of a successful operation. 138 men rescued from across the Rhine. "Why you hiding back here?"

"Oh you know, enjoying the scenery." She glanced and winked at Bill. The look of shock on his face was profoundly amusing. She turned to him. "Why else do you think I like you boys so much?" She teased.

"Aye, well you only need to tell me once!" Bill said as he moved closer to her.

She laughed at him, and then felt hands grab her waist from behind, turn her, and dip her. Laughing harder, she saw Bull in front of her. He pulled her back to her feet and put his arm around her shoulders. "I saw her first Bill, so hands off."

"Hey now, I dispute that." Luz approached them. "I'm pretty sure I bought her first pint."

"Well now look what you've gone and started, Lieutenant." Bull grinned, patting her arm.

"Oh you know, I'm like a fox amongst the chickens." She smirked.

"Chickens!?"

* * *

Roo could still hear the celebrations from a successful operation. Not that Saz had told him it had been successful, but he assumed that they wouldn't be so jovial if something had gone wrong. _She doesn't have to tell you, it's not our operation._ And he knew that. But that had never stopped her from telling him in the past.

He mentally hit himself. He had completely screwed up their relationship. _Is it possible to be more stupid? _He did love her. He would drop anything and everything for her. Do anything for her. He had never felt this strongly; even when he had been with Emily. _Emily. _He shook the memory from his head. He knew that Saz didn't feel that way for him, yet he kissed her anyway. He knew it would ruin everything, but he still did it.

And on top of it all, he was so incessantly jealous of Winters. A man who had only been around for a matter of months, but who already had a deep connection with Saz. So deep, that Roo knew that she was falling for him._ And the man didn't even have to do anything._

He looked across the yard and saw a door open. It was Saz. She was looking up into the distance. Following her eye line he saw that she was staring up at Winter's office. He saw that she had two bottles in her hands. Wandering across the grass, she was clearly headed to him. He felt a sadness pull at his heart. In his selfishness he had lost her as a friend. What was worse, was that in a time when she most needed a friend, any ability he had to intervene had seemingly evaporated._ So stupid._

* * *

Dick was sitting in his office, still finishing off reports. He could hear the celebrations from across the yard, and could barely concentrate. It was frustrating. Not because he wanted quiet, but because he felt a bit left out. He still felt like Easy was his company, and to not be with them was odd.

Hearing a creak of the floorboards he looked up to see a flushed looking Sarah coming up the stairs. She had a big smile on her face. "Morning, Dick."

He looked at his watch. _0315._ "Morning, Lieutenant."

She sat in the seat in front of the desk and pulled out two bottles. "Don't worry. Strictly non-alcoholic. I guarded it with my life to prevent the boys attempting to liven it up a bit, if you get my train of thought." Her eyes twinkled at him.

"Well, if you went to that much trouble, it wouldn't be very gentlemanly if I turned it down now, would it?"

"No, it wouldn't." She said matter-of-factly, as she handed him the bottle.

He could feel her watching him as he leaned back and took a gulp. Ginger beer. He looked up at her in surprise. "How did you manage to find ginger beer?"

"Oh, I have my ways." She said mischievously. _There is definitely an amusing story behind that._

They sat in relative silence for a couple of minutes, just relaxing and drinking. It was very comfortable, and Dick could feel some of the tension of the last month slipping away. Another roar of laughter in the background sliced through the silence. He could feel himself tense up slightly. Sarah had spotted it, because he could see her eyes narrow.

"They're in good hands, Dick."

"I know. It's not that."

"You're feeling a bit on the outside?"

He looked at her. She already knew him too well. "Something like that."

She nodded. "Fair enough."

"I'm not sure why I feel this way." He shrugged. "I guess part of it is that I'm stuck here at almost," he glanced at his watch, "half past three, writing reports."

"Instead of celebrating a job well done?"

"Instead of celebrating a job well done."

She was staring at him again. "Would you be too offended if I offered you an honest opinion?"

"No. In fact I'd welcome it." He smiled at her.

"I think the other part of it is the control." He could tell that he had flinched at that by the reaction on her face. "Oh, it's not like that. I mean, the familiarity, the control of something amidst the chaos that is well," she motioned to their surroundings, "this."

He thought. She was probably right. Having that ounce of control meant he could ignore a lot of what was going on around him. It gave him a focus. Ever since being promoted to Battalion XO, and having people like Zielinski shove papers under his nose 24 hours a day, he had felt a little lost. He shook his head. _She knows me too well already._

"You want to know how I got the ginger beer?" A welcome change in direction.

He smirked at her. "As a matter of fact, yes, I do."

"Well, I noticed earlier in the day that a certain young Easy sergeant was unusually quiet." _Luz._ "He wasn't moving far from his bed, which of course is also odd, given his love of socialising."_ Definitely Luz._ "I of course suspected he was hiding something. I actually thought it was money." He raised his eyebrow at her. "I played poker with them the other night. Needless to say I used my obvious charm to my advantage, and managed to end the night with Luz owing me." She grinned at him.

"Right, and so you thought he was holding out on you."

"Well, yes. And I thought I should teach him a lesson. Anyway," she waved her hand, "I waited. And waited. And waited. After all, he had to hear the call of nature eventually." He laughed. "Once he left, I was in, and I swiped the bottles." She smirked at him. "Of course, I couldn't just swipe the bottles."

"No?"

"No." She leaned in. "That would be far too easy. So I simply found a couple of bottles, and filled them up with my own special mixture. I could only find a little bit of each, so I had to get creative."

"Oh?"

"Think warm, curdled milk, and beer. With a hint of water." She started to chuckle. "Seriously Dick, you should have seen the look on his face when he decided to open his beloved bottles!" She imitated Luz and pulled a face.

Their laughter carried through the still night air.

* * *

_**Mourmelon le Grand, 2**__**nd**__** December, 1944**_

News that Captain Ryan was coming back and was to be joining them was welcome news to Sarah. Although, it wasn't as if they'd been very busy over the last month. For Special Forces they were doing a whole lot of not much, and that was frustrating to a lot of the troopers. It was less so for her: she was enjoying not having the pressure to worry about. Having Ryan back was going to be immensely helpful on that point.

Ryan coming back also took the pressure off in another way: Roo. She sighed. They spoke, but it was just so awkward. She really missed him. But she knew she had built a bit of a Chinese wall around herself that was impossible for him to penetrate. _Stupid._

She tilted her head and look in the mirror. _Not bad_. There was a formal dinner on tonight for the Officer's, and she had been invited. It was easy for the men, they had something automatically to wear. But she was forbidden to wear pants. That annoyed her to no end – not that she didn't want to wear a skirt – but because this was the first time that it had been insisted that because of her gender she needed to wear one. She suspected she could thank Colonel Sink for that one.

Nix had been very helpful in tracking down a black pencil skirt for her to go with her dress uniform. She smoothed her hands down the side. Yes, she looked very proper. It had been sometime since she wore a skirt, and it was quite liberating to feel like a real woman again.

She looked down her leg and frowned. Heels. Nix had insisted that she needed to wear heels as well. Personally she disputed that, as she was already going to stick out like a sore thumb because she was a woman Officer and so she didn't need to look taller than she already way. But seeing as Nix had been tasked to find her shoes and a skirt, and she didn't have the time to find an alternative: heels it was.

_Knock knock._ She walked towards the door and opened it, to find a nicely dressed Nixon standing opposite her. He let out a low whistle as he side stepped into her room. "You scrub up well."

She smiled. "You don't look too bad yourself."

He chuckled. "You're just being nice to me because you can see the bottle of VAT 69 in my hands."

"Well, I didn't want to say, but..."

"I thought you weren't drinking, anyway."

"To be fair, I haven't had anything to drink since the 12th of September. And tonight I'm up against officers and their lady friends, who will no doubt see me as some crazed lesbian or army whore."

Nix grabbed a couple of glasses and sat them down on the desk. "I find it interesting that you remember that date so clearly." He poured the whisky into the glasses, and handed her one.

She raised his eyebrow at him. "Your point, Sir?"

"Well, it must have been a very special night to have been so fondly remembered." The grin on his face said it all.

She rolled her eyes at him. "I remember lots of dates. The 28th of September is another, but that one isn't remembered so fondly."

"Oh, so that means you do remember that night in Aldbourne fondly." _Fuck. Walked right into that one._

She chuckled and looked Nix in the eye. "How is it that you are able to do that?"

"I'm an Intelligence Officer. It's my job to extract information in creative ways." He stared at her intently, watching her reaction. He was far too mischievous for his own good. "Dick remembers that night fondly as well."

"He does?" _Fuck. And again._

The grin on his face said it all. "For the amount of arguments you guys have had, you sure are fond of each other."

"Mm hmm."

"Although your habit of having late night cups of Joe with Dick has coincided nicely with a decrease in the chats you seem to be having with Sergeant Clarke." He was clearly testing the waters. The fact that he was still watching her to gauge her reaction showed her that.

"Okay, spit it out Nix, what do you want?"

He sat down and patted the seat next to him, indicating that he wanted to sit next to him. She eyed him up suspiciously and sat down. Sensing that this was about to get uncomfortable, she downed the rest of her glass and poured herself another.

"I just want to know what the deal is. September 12th, September 28th, two men chasing your tail. It's all very scandalous, and I think me and my bottle of VAT 69 deserve to know the story."

"I'd hardly put Dick into the chasing my tail category."

"But Clarke is?"

She sighed. "I'm really bad at this aren't I?"

"Sure are." He patted her knee.

"This isn't really any of your business." He looked at her, questioning. "But," she held up her hand, "I suspect if I don't give you something you won't leave me alone. So, this is what I'll say." She took a mouthful of whisky. "Sergeant Clarke is one of my best friends. Unfortunately that line was potentially crossed, and so now it is all a bit awkward. If you hadn't noticed, when it comes to men and romanticism I'm not a natural."

"Why, you don't say!"

"Oh shush you. Anyway. It's awkward."

"And what about Dick?"

"Oh I am so not going there with you." She eyed him. "You will tell him in a heartbeat if I say anything about him. I'm not that stupid."

He grinned at her, and polished off the rest of his drink. "Well, you don't need to say anything anyway. Someone just has to mention his name and you become a nervous wreck. It's quite endearing, really."

She pulled a face of mock shock. "Oh you are so lucky that you are generous with your alcohol."

He chuckled. "Why do you think I brought it along?"

* * *

Sarah and Nix had arrived right on the dot for the dinner. Obviously being in full dress it was quite clear to those women present that she was an Officer. Unfortunately this didn't mean that they had any respect for her. While the night had started pleasantly enough, she quickly became more and more uncomfortable. Nix has just told her to bite her tongue and it would be over soon enough. But that was a whole lot easier than it sounded.

And so to help her not yell at these pretentious women, she decided to kick Nix every time she wanted to say something to them. Which was all the time. She suspected that Nix was going to have a very sore leg.

However, despite her attempts to bite her tongue, as the night drew on, and she had consumed more alcohol, her ability to filter out her responses started to wane. Nix looked increasingly amused by what was coming out of her mouth. Dick did as well, although his ability to hide his amusement was far better.

"Where did you go to school, Miss Price?" The one with the big blue bow in her hair asked her.

"Oh, I don't think it matters. Besides, you didn't even know where New Zealand was at the beginning of the night, I can't imagine you can learn much about my pedigree by knowing what school I went to."

"You know, you have an excellent command of the English language."

"Excuse me?" She looked at Dick and raised her eyebrows.

"Oh well, being a native it can't be easy being at such a disadvantage when it comes to proper language."

"Proper language?" _Did I just step back in time?_

"Ah, Miss Prendergast, where did you say you went to school again?" Nix, bless him, had sensed that her rage was about to boil over, and had flawlessly directed the conversation in another direction.

She looked around the table. She was so uncomfortable. Not only was she the only woman officer, she was also, according to another of the women, from a 'savage' country filled with angry natives. _What am I in, the 18__th__ century? _She thought to the rest of the boys, who were all no doubt at the bar, relaxing and having a fantastic time. _I wish I was there. S_he sat up straight. _Wait a minute, why stay? If I annoy someone, it doesn't matter because Ryan is coming back. And I doubt they'd miss me._

With her mind made up, she stood up from the table. "I'm terribly sorry, but I am suddenly feeling quite ill. If you excuse me, I think I shall call it a night and return to my quarters." She nodded in the direction of the guests. "It was lovely to meet you all."

She turned and started to move away from her table, when she heard Dick. "I will escort Lieutenant Price out."

Walking quickly, Dick was soon at her arm. "Feeling ill, huh?"

"Okay, a small white lie, but you have to admit, if I was to stay there much longer I'd likely have caused some real trouble."

He chuckled. "To be honest, they'd only be getting what they deserved. I hope you didn't take any of it to heart."

"Oh no. I've heard far worse. Besides, it reflects nothing of my character, only theirs." She patted him on the arm. "You'd better head back in. They won't miss me, but they'd definitely miss their dah-ling Lieutenant Winters." She laughed at him.

"Great." He shook his head. "Just great."

She turned on her heel and quickly walked in the direction of the bar. When she could see the light and hear the noise in the distance, her pace picked up. All she wanted was some fun company and more alcohol._ Watch that drink, Price. You're too wound up._ She frowned. _Oh be quiet. After having to listen to that crap all night, I surely deserve to let loose a bit._

Stepping into the bar, the light and heat hit her, and she smiled. She heard a couple of wolf whistles from the Easy boys, who were in the corner. She grinned and walked up to them. "Evening boys."

"Nice heels." Tab said, grinning at her.

"Forget the heels, Tab, check out those pins." Luz said, putting his arm around her.

"I hope you boys are done checking me out. Because, if you don't mind, I'm in severe need of an alcoholic beverage. Or ten."

"I thought you weren't drinking?" Bill said to her.

"Honestly, after the night I've had, with those people, all I want is a drink and some good company. Now seriously boys," she turned to face them, "is that really too much to ask?"

* * *

Sergeant Clarke had seen Sarah come into the bar earlier in the night. And there she had stayed, drinking for hours in the corner with a few of the boys from Easy. Normally her drinking wouldn't have bothered him. But he knew she was doing it to escape, and that was dangerous. Even though they hadn't talked much, he could tell by the way she carried herself that she was not happy. Not even remotely happy. And the drink wasn't going to make that go away.

And so he had kept a close eye on her all night. It was now almost midnight, and she was still going. But he had noticed that her tongue had gotten pointier – her remarks had a barb, and some of the men (particularly the replacements) had fallen victim to her quick thinking.

He knew he had to intervene, even though she wasn't going to be happy about it. But he hoped that she would at least see some reason and just slow down. Otherwise it would lead to her downfall. _It would have been easy to get her to slow down before._ Before. Before he lost himself in some fantasy world and kissed her.

He walked up to her, and tapped her on the shoulder. "Can I please talk to you for a moment, Lieutenant?"

"I'm sorry, can't you see I have better things to do at this moment?" _Ouch_.

"It won't take a moment."

Despite him not seeing her face, he knew she had pulled a face because of the smirks on the Easy boys' faces. She spun around. "Fine." Getting up sharply, she walked a few steps away from the corner, pint in hand. "What?"

The intensity in her eyes was more than he had seen in a long time. _Tread carefully._ "Are you alright?"

"Look at me. I have a pint in hand, great company, and no one annoying me. Well. That was until a few moments ago."

"I'm worried. You're upset, you shouldn't be drinking like this, and you know it."

"You don't know a damn thing about how I'm feeling, Sergeant."

"I know I lost the right to ask you these questions a long time ago, but can't you see –"

All of a sudden a glass smashed on the ground, and he felt liquid and glass spew all over his leg and the floor. He looked at Saz. She had thrown her pint on the ground. "Damn straight you lost that right. Seriously, Roo. What the hell do you want from me?"

He became aware of the audience around him. A couple of the soldiers from Easy had formed up behind Saz. "Maybe it's best if you leave Lieutenant Price alone, Sergeant. We don't want no trouble."

"Don't worry boys. I think it is best if I call it a night myself. After all, early start." She turned on her heel, and walked towards the door, picking up her coat on the way.

He stared back at the Easy boys, who were still standing, arms crossed, ready to jump to Saz's rescue at any moment. He was truly on the outside. He took his cue, and walked out the door of the bar. Once outside, he could see Saz out in front of him, about 100 yards away. And next to her, stood Winters. Once again, in the right place. Once again, comforting her. Once again, there.

He watched as Winters gave her a hug, and a kiss on the forehead. Winters lingered, just for that split second longer, before letting her go. Both Roo and Winters then stood following Saz as she walked out into the distance, disappearing into the dark. Winters then turned, and looked straight up at him.

He could feel the jealousy burning up inside him. The anger. The sadness, that he wasn't good enough for her. But he knew then that he needed to stop pitying himself. For her sake, he needed to be the bigger person. And there was only one way he could do that.

* * *

Hope you enjoyed the latest instalment! I have had such the craziest week with university (pulling my first all-nighter a few days ago). But it had to be done. Anyway, have had spent my time recovering by pulling the rest of this chapter together. Just a couple of notes.

The first is that in some places it says that 139 men were rescued in Operation Pegasus, but I read a transcript of Lieutenant Colonel Dobie's report and it said 138. Either way, its one person and I don't suppose you'll all hate me for getting it wrong, but I thought I should mention it anyway!

The second is just a note that I hope that my writing is good enough to explain the slow unravelling and crazy ups-and-downs in mood of Sarah. I have a definite vision of how I want her character to evolve, but any feedback would be fantastic (otherwise I'm flying a bit blind on that one).


	10. He's No Fool

I know that two big chapters in as many days is crazy, but I just wanted to share it will you. I suspect you won't hate me for doing so!

* * *

**Chapter Ten: He's No Fool**

_**Mourmelon le Grand, 3**__**rd**__** December, 1944**_

Sarah cracked an eye open, and looked dizzily around the room. _Mid-afternoon?_ She was very pleased that no-one had bugged her this morning. Because she was so not in the mood for niceties today. In fact, it was very fortuitous that it was a Sunday. The likelihood of anyone coming anywhere near this room, whether or not last night had happened, was very low.

_Oh god, last night._ She wanted to scream and cry all at the same time. "God dammit!" She threw a pillow across the room, which connected with a vase, causing it to come crashing to the ground. The sharp sound reverberated, adding to the ache in her head. She sat up and looked at the shards on the ground. But it was all too quick. She felt her stomach retch, and suddenly she was bent over the bed, discarding the contents of her stomach all over the floor. The spittle, the chunks, the spit hanging from her lips.

"Fuck. Shit. Gah!" She forced herself up and grabbed a small towel. She wiped her mouth, and then quickly wiped up the floor, throwing the towel into the bath when she was finished. She then crashed over to the shards, attempting to collect them from the ground. It was a failed attempt. All her angry grabbing at the shards did was to cut her fingers. Exasperated, she plopped herself on the ground, and just stared at the blood.

_Where did it go all wrong? Where did I go wrong?_ She felt so useless. So much for being strong. She started to pick the small ceramic shards from out of her fingers. _Look at yourself._ She peered around her. It was an embarrassing sight. The room was uncharacteristically messy. She knew she looked tired – the bags under her eyes had been getting darker and more prominent over the last month. Her hair was scraggly. She was angry all the damn time. Everything was everyone else's fault, of course. She'd shut out her closest friend. She couldn't bear to face the fact that she was falling for another. And she had been going out of her way to put herself in the firing line in some fruitless attempt to make this war somehow more... manageable.

"You're kidding yourself, Price." She sighed, and stuck a finger in her mouth to try and curb the bleeding. _I am such an embarrassment. _For so long she had prided herself on being this strong, Maori woman. Making an attempt to be a positive role model for others. Decisive. Independent. _What a joke._ She had lost her footing, and instead of picking herself back up, was trying to ignore everything.

_I'm running away._ Since when did she run away from anything? She thought back to when she was at school, and all the girls used to be mean to her because she refused to play with dolls. _Honestly, how boring is that?_ Or when she first joined the Army, and there was that rumour that she was a lesbian. And when they were in Egypt, after she had agreed to join with Ryan, and someone tried to say the only reason why she got asked was because she had slept with the David Stirling (like she had actually met him). Did she run away then? Hell no.

And since when was she boring? Because she knew that she was boring now. _Think about it. How long have you been wallowing in your own self-pity for? _She'd never thought of it like that. She hated to think of the respect she had lost. Did her men hate her? She wouldn't know. She couldn't remember the last time she had a real conversation with half of them.

She thought about her family. Her mother, so wise, so thoughtful, so strong. Her father, generous and kind. Her brother, Charles. Her best friend. He had always looked after her. Taught her stuff secretly after school. And so naturally, if he was to join the Army, then she was too.

She could feel the tears forming in her eyes. The lump in her throat. She hadn't thought about Charles for such a long time. Probably not since he had died. Maybe that was when it started. The running.

She chuckled to herself as she recalled when one of his friend's declared his love for her one evening. Charles had been hiding around a corner, and had heard. No longer was this boy his friend. "Don't even think about touching my sister. She's too good for any of you boys."

She wondered what Charles would think of her situation now. On the one hand she had Roo, her best friend, and someone she loved dearly. And on the other hand she had Dick. Someone, who for some reason, could see through to the depths of her soul with seemingly no effort at all. Who she also loved. Deeper than she could admit. Would Charles approve of her choices thus far? Or would he tell her to stop running?

It was at that point that Sarah knew what she had to do. To be strong, she had to make difficult choices. Recognise her weaknesses. Embrace them. And be fair to herself and those around her. It would take a while, but it was time to rebuild. The first task: cleaning herself up.

* * *

_**Mourmelon le Grand, 4**__**th**__** December, 1944**_

Sarah straightened her skirt and took a deep breath. She then knocked on the door of Dick's office. She could see that he was in there, hunched over that endless amount of paperwork, through the glass. He looked up and, once seeing it was her, smiled. She opened the door and stepped in. "Sorry to disturb."

He held his arms up. "Oh no, you're rescuing me."

She smiled and glanced onto the ground nervously. Spotting the chair in front of the desk, she drifted towards it and sat down. She looked up to see Dick with a small smile on his face, head tilted, but nonetheless clearly concerned.

"I just wanted to say sorry." She frowned and looked up at the roof. "And thanks."

"You really don't have to."

She sighed. "No, I do. I once again managed to embarrass myself on Saturday night. I swear, it's all getting a bit too regular."

Dick stood up and walked around to her. "Sarah, you have nothing to worry about. Stop beating up on yourself."

"But I do, Dick. I do have something to worry about. I'm an Officer. I was put in charge because I should be able to handle all of this shit, but I'm not. I'm thinking I should apply for a transfer out of the unit. I need to face my issues head on. The way I've acted recently it's," she could feel a few tears in her eyes, "it's unacceptable." She sheepishly looked at Dick, who was now kneeling in front of her.

"You listen to me. I see nothing but an amazing person, and an incredible soldier, sitting before me. We all can barely handle it at the best of times. You're not alone." He said knowingly. He grabbed her hand and held onto it tightly. "I understand."

"You're too good to me."

"You're too hard on yourself. I'm just making up the difference." He grinned at her. "You once asked if you could be honest to me. Can I ask the same?"

She looked at him curiously, before nodding.

"To face your fear; your embarrassment; your disappointment, you need to stay with them. I'll help you." She could feel him squeezing her hand tightly. "I'm here for you."

They stood then. Sarah became very aware of the fact that Dick was still holding her hand. Glancing at it, she looked back at him and caught his eye. She searched his eyes, and smiled at the comfort and warmth she saw looking back at her. She squeezed his hand. He stepped ever so slightly forward. Stroking her cheek with his thumb, he leaned forward, and brushed his lips on hers. _Oh god._ Just as she was about to give in, someone behind them cleared their throat.

Sarah had never seen two people move so quickly apart. All of a sudden there was a wide gulf between them, and Dick had swiftly moved back behind the desk. She turned, and was greeted with a very amused looking Nixon. She glowered at him, before turning back to Dick.

"Thanks for your help."

"No problem, Lieutenant."

On the way out of the office she walked past Nixon, discreetly kicking his ankle as she went past him.

* * *

Dick watched as Sarah exited. _Why are we always interrupted?_ His eyes narrowed at Lew, who was clearly enjoying himself and what he had walked in on. Dick mentally kicked himself for not just grabbing her and kissing her as hard as he wanted to.

"I'm sorry, did I just interrupt something?"

Dick growled. "You have this uncanny ability of positioning yourself in the most annoying of places."

"Hey now, I'm happy for you two kids. It's about time you made a move on her." _He was watching for that long?_

Dick sighed and sunk into his chair. "Well thanks to you and your impeccable timing I have no idea if she feels the same way."

Dick was shocked to hear Lew let out a loud laugh. He glared at him. "Dick, seriously, are you blind?" Lew sat down in front of him. "She visits you all the time, she turns down an advance by her best friend, and I don't know about you, but when was the last time you saw a man get close enough to her to be able to plant one on her?"

_Best friend?_ "Sergeant Clarke?"

"Yes, Sergeant Clarke." Lew looked at him, with a dumbfounded look on his face. "Come on, Dick. Tell me you aren't so blind that you haven't noticed how awkward it is between them?"

"Of course I've noticed. I just didn't think it was because of something like that though." _That would explain why he looked like he was going to break my neck on Saturday night._

Lew shrugged at him. "Saz said that other day that he was one of her best friends, but a line had been crossed. What else would it mean?"

Dick raised his eyebrow at Lew. "You don't actually know this for sure?"

"Again, stop being so blind." Lew leaned forward and rested an elbow on his knee. "Who cares anyway. She likes you, Dick. Anyone can see that." Lew shook his head and chuckled. "Man, are we lucky you don't work in intelligence."

Before Dick could answer there was a knock at the door. It was Sergeant Clarke. He looked very grim, and very serious. "Captain Winters, if you have a moment I'd appreciate a word."

Dick looked at Lew, who was clearly thoroughly interested in getting in on the scandal. Dick tilted his head and glared at him, and he quickly got the message that he should be leaving. "I'll leave you boys to it, shall I? No doubt you have some important business to attend to." _I could really hurt him right now._

Lew left as quickly as he had arrived, and Sergeant Clarke was soon sitting in his place on the chair in front of Dick's desk. "How can I help, Sergeant?"

"Roo. And it's about Sarah." _Well he cuts straight to the chase._ "I need your help."

_What is he scheming? _"Oh, and what, you're recommending she should get transferred?"

Roo stared at him, unwavering. "I'm not here to get into an argument with you. Nor am I here to cause trouble. I'm here to be honest with you. I know Sarah wouldn't bother with you if you weren't a decent man, and I need your help."

Dick was starting to get annoyed. What was he getting at? "Okay then," he leaned back into his chair, "cut to the chase." He paused. "Sergeant."

"I'm sure you know how I feel about Sarah." _Yes. Although that was the final confirmation._ Dick could feel the jealousy burning through his body. "And I'm sure you also know that she doesn't want me. But, she is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I love her. I can't just turn that off."

Despite that revelation, the jealousy still burned. Dick couldn't help but be distrustful, and a little territorial. _How is this not causing trouble?_ "Are you telling me to back off, Sergeant?"

Roo glared at him. "If I did, would you?"

"Not a chance."

"Then no."

Silence. The tension was thick. "Captain, we are two very different people. But there is one thing we have in common. Sarah." Dick could feel Roo eyeing him. He could also feel his blood pressure rising. "She needs a break from all of this."

"And you think I can help?"

"I know you can. I've heard that there could be a chance for her to get away for a few days. With Captain Ryan a couple of days off arriving, I need your help to organise it. I don't have the authority to do it myself." Dick could see Roo clenching his jaw, and his knuckles were turning white as he gripped the chair. He was clearly not enjoying being forced to ask Dick for help.

Dick's eyes narrowed. "You want me to organise a pass for her to go to Paris?"

"Yes."

More silence. More tension. Suddenly Roo stood. "If you are anywhere near good enough for her, then you will make this happen." Roo walked to the door, as he went to turn the handle, he stopped and looked back at Dick. "By the way, Captain?"

"Yes?"

"If you ever hurt her, I'll break your neck." And then he was gone.

Dick sat there, in silence. _Well, it has definitely been a morning of revelations._

_

* * *

_

_**Paris, 6**__**th**__** December, 1944**_

Later in the day on the 4th, Saz had gotten word that she was to take leave in Paris for 48 hours. She was taken aback at first, but was secretly very happy. It gave her some time to think and reflect in a new environment. Maybe that would give her some new insights.

The train ride into Paris had been a bit bumpy, in more ways than one. Before she left Mourmelon, Luz had managed to track her down and hand her a package. It was from home. She had been very shocked when she saw the postmark. Luz had obviously realised its importance based off her reaction because he suddenly morphed from a joker into much needed counsel, and had asked her if she was okay. _Such a good friend._ She was lucky that she hadn't lost him, too.

She had sat staring at it ever since he had given it to her. It peeked ever so slightly out of the top of her bag. Teasing her. Every few minutes she glanced at it, far too scared to look inside it. It was almost as if it was Pandora's box. She knew that by opening it she would find good, but at the same time it would be causing her to face all the bad.

Once at the hotel, she decided that she would leave it there. This next 48 hours were for her to figure herself out, on her own. Whatever help or hindrance that package would give, it was an obstacle to tackle later. _One step at a time._

She had been sitting on some stairs, overlooking a small canal, when a familiar face had appeared before her. _Dick._ She smiled widely at him. "Fancy seeing you here."

He grinned at her. "I suspect Lew and Harry had a hand in it."

She nodded. He sat down beside her. "Enjoying Paris?"

"Honestly?" He asked. "Not particularly. I don't know, it just doesn't seem like a place you should be by yourself."

"Ah, but you're not alone. I'm here."

"So you are."

They sat in relative silence for a few minutes, each in their own head space. Suddenly, her thoughts seemed more relaxed. Just having the company made her feel at ease. She smiled ever so slightly, but it was caught by Dick. She chuckled. "It's nothing."

More silence. It was relaxing. "Where are you staying?" she asked him.

"Not too far from here, actually. I suspect you're in the same place."

"The one with the pretentious French doorman?"

He laughed at her. "I think you have just described most hotels in Paris."

She joined in. "Okay. Dumb moment. It's about two blocks away, with the blue roof? Room 112."

"Room 231."

"The name of the hotel escapes me. Me and the French language don't see eye-to-eye."

"I had always thought that people who knew more than one language found learning others quite easy."

"Well, I suppose that's true. I don't know. I understand it okay, I just don't get the pronunciation, I think." She threw a small stone down the stairs.

"Was it hard learning two languages?"

She smiled at him. She liked that he was interested. "No, not really. It was just part of everyday life. It wasn't like we'd have an 'English speaking hour' and then a 'Maori speaking hour'. It was just interwoven into the very fabric of my upbringing, I guess. I'm lucky in that way. I have gotten the best of both worlds."

"How so?"

"Well, my grandmother is actually Irish." Dick looked at her. "I know! Who would've thought? Actually," she leaned into him, "it probably explains my love of the alcohol." They laughed. "So yeah, I'm really quite blessed."

"Do you write home much?" Automatically she felt tense. Dick noticed and put his hand on her arm. "Sorry, are you okay?"

She took a deep breath in. "Yes. Sorry, awkward subject." She peered at him. "I think I've told you my brother was killed." He nodded. "Well I, I maybe haven't written home since then."

She looked sheepishly at him. What she found was not someone passing judgement, but a face full of concern. "I'm sorry to hear that. Can I help?"

_How is it possible for someone so selfless to exist?_ "You're helping right now. It's a relief to actually just hear the words spoken out loud."

He nodded. Sarah sensed that he wanted to say something but was holding back. She threw a pebble at his head, and grinned when he looked at her. She raised an eyebrow at him.

"Is this a challenge?"

"I'm not sure. Whatever it is, I'm sure I'll win." Her smile got wider.

He chuckled at her. "You shouldn't be so cocky. After all, you're wearing heels and a skirt."

"And who is the cocky one now?" She made a noise of mock disgust. "I'll bet tomorrow's breakfast that I can beat you back to the hotel."

"You're on."

Sarah didn't need to hear Dick's answer. She was already up and gone, running down the picturesque street, dodging people. "Hey!" She could hear Dick in the background. Running faster, her feet wobbled a bit, but she used an American soldier to steady herself as she continued sprinting. "Thank you!" She yelled at him as she sprinted past.

She could see the blue roof of the hotel. Suddenly she felt two strong arms grab her around the waist, turning her around, before letting her go. She laughed. _Nice to know he can be mischievous when he needs to be!_ Refusing to give up, she quickly whipped off her shoes and managed to catch up with him just as he hit the hotel foyer.

Puffing, she hit him on the arm. "You cheated."

"Oh what, don't like it when people don't play to the rules?"

She stuck her tongue out at him. It was so exhilarating, just letting go and being well... silly. She leaned on him and started to slip her heels back on. "You have to admit it though, I'm pretty good at running in heels." She gave him a wink.

He chuckled and shook his head. "Okay, you got me there."

Sarah fumbled with her heel, and leaned closer into Dick. She felt his strong arm wrap around her waist from behind in order to steady her. It felt so right. For the first time in a while, she felt very free. It was almost as if she had shed her skin. Once the heel was on, she stood, with Dick behind her. His arm was still wrapped around her middle. She didn't want to move.

She watched in front of her at a soldier and a woman, had emerged from the hotel bar, drinks in hand. They were both very clearly drunk. All of a sudden, the women wobbled on her heel, and her wine went everywhere. Sarah grinned and shook her head at the events unfolding in front of her. The alcohol was all over the soldier, and his companion was busy attempting to dry it off fruitlessly. She let out a small giggle, which was unfortunately loud enough for the couple to hear. The woman looked at her and gave her what could only be called a look of death.

She laughed. "Is my death stare that good?"

She felt Dick lean into her, and he whispered in her ear. "Much better!" He grabbed her arm and dragged Sarah up the stairs, away from the angry glares of the couple. When they got to the top, Sarah's giggles turned into a laugh. She broke free from Dick's arm.

Holding her hands up in surrender, she attempted to stifle her laughter. "Boy, that serves as the perfect reminder as to the perils of alcohol! Not that I'm short of lessons on that front, of course. It was bad enough in _Mourmelon_, let alone that night in Aldbourne, can you imagine the kind of trouble—"

She stopped suddenly and looked at Dick. _Oh crap, that came out so wrong._ The look on his face was heartbreaking. It was clear that in one foul swoop she had managed to dismantle their last few hours together.

"I—" She put her hands on her head and grimaced. _I didn't mean that._ Dick's face was full confusion. "Oh lord, I'm sorry. Good night Dick."

And she bolted. Made a beeline straight to her room. Ran away. Fast. Leaving Dick standing there.

She entered her room, shut the door, and then leaned against it. Her breath was shallow and fast. _Why did I just say that? And why did I just run away? I thought I wasn't doing that anymore?_ She ripped off her jacket, and sunk to the ground. Putting her head between her knees, she took a deep breath in. _I don't regret it. That night in Aldbourne, despite the ensuing madness, was a good thing. _The hurt look on his face kept replaying in her head. _I have to tell him that it wasn't... it wasn't a bad. That I wanted it as much then as I do now._

But Sarah was scared. Her old confidence had been completely stripped away from her during the last few months. The weather of war had eroded away any sense of self. Here she was, frightened to share her true feelings with a man who was everything she had ever wanted.

She took a shaky breath in. _Remember the Man in the Arena._ And let the breath out.

Solid breath in._ Concentrate. _Smooth breath out._ Relax._

Deep, smooth breath in. _That's it._ Relaxed, smooth, and confident breath out._ Beautiful._

She didn't know how long she had been sitting there, but it felt like it had been a while. She lifted her head up, and stood with a sense of purpose. Before she walked out the door, she checked herself in the mirror, and attempted to calm her hair down. Satisfied, she strode out of her room and up the stairs towards Dick's. With every step she took, she felt a little bit lighter. That was, until she saw his door, where the crashing realisation of what she was about to do came down upon her.

_Just breathe._

She knocked on his door. There was no answer.

She knocked again. _Damned if I went through all of that to not have him be here._

No answer.

She sighed and turned away. Lost in her disappointment, she didn't hear the door open. "Sarah?"

She stopped and turned back. Behind the door stood a half-clothed Dick, water dripping off his hair and onto his face. She couldn't help but admire what was in front of her. He was quite the specimen. Suddenly aware of his gaze, her face started going red. "Uh, sorry. I didn't mean to disturb."

"No, it's fine." He motioned her towards him and the room, concern showing on his face. "Are you okay?"

She stepped past him and into the room. _No? _"Yes." She turned to face him. "I wanted to explain about before." She blurted out. "About what I said. About that night in Aldbourne?" _Spit it out, Price._

He nodded.

"It's just... It wasn't... bad." _Oh god, he makes me so tongue tied._ She looked at him and smiled shyly. "I don't regret what happened." He stood there, staring at her with such intensity. She took a sharp breath in and looked away. "Ah, well, I uhm, I probably shouldn't keep you for much longer."

She walked towards the door. Just as she went to grab the door knob she felt a hand grab hers. Dick pulled her back to face him. He sat there, staring at her. "I do regret that night."

A sharp pain struck her in the chest. He must've had seen the look on her face because he smiled and pulled her closer.

His voice was soft. "No, it's not like that." He reached out and cupped the side of her face. "I regret being a coward. I let you get away." He inched closer. She could feel the heat radiating off him. "I can't let that happen again."

Their bodies were touching now. She could feel the water on his chest dripping down her shirt. She bit her lip, and looked away. Dick kissed her on the top of her head. Her eyes met his. Any apprehension she felt melted away. He leaned in.

His lips were soft.

* * *

Dick wasn't even going to answer the door when he heard the knock. He couldn't help but think to hell with them all. But fortunately, that little voice in his head won him over. Any attempts at rebellion never seemed to last with him.

He was had been confused by what Sarah had said earlier. They had gotten so close over the last couple of months and so he had been taken aback at the comment. But after the bath had relaxed him, and he had replayed the scene over in his mind, he could see that she didn't mean it. Certainly not in the way it had come out, at least. The look of pure horror on her face after she realised how it sounded was enough to convince him of that.

She had looked so vulnerable when he opened the door. She had attempted to put on a brave face, but he knew her well enough now to see through that. Nervous, embarrassed, and fidgety. Her flaws were her perfection. And it only made him want her.

He couldn't let her run away again. _Be a man._ He pulled her close to him. He could see her chest heaving. "I do regret that night."

A look of deep pain and sadness flashed in her eyes. He put his hands around her waist and pulled her closer to him. "No, it's not like that." _Lord she is so beautiful_.

He stared into her eyes, and reached out to her face. "I regret being a coward. I let you get away." _Only foolish men can't recognise a good thing when they see it. And only foolish men would let that good thing get away._ "I can't let that happen again."

The touch of her body against his sent electricity through his veins. The water in his hair and on his skin was dripping everywhere. But he didn't care. What he cared about was right in front of him. Sarah bit the side of her lip and looked at her feet. He smiled. The fact that he had the ability to make such a strong woman shy thrilled him. _Give in to it. _

Her hair smelt like jasmine. He ever so slightly kissed her on the top of her head. The next thing he knew she was staring at him. He leaned forward, and captured her lips on his. He kissed her softly, tentatively, gently. She tasted so sweet. So real. His._ Just let go._

He instinctively found himself pulling her closer, one hand wrapped around her perfect frame, the other tangled in her hair. Sarah's response to this was to part her lips, giving him permission to kiss her with more urgency. He pressed his mouth harder on hers, and he felt her tongue touch his. Sarah had wrapped her arms around his neck, and pushed herself closer to him, her hips grinding against his. _Lose control._

Lifting her up, he felt her skirt ride up as he slid his hands up her thighs. They crashed against the wall. A small gasp escaped her lips. They both pulled at the buttons of her shirt, fumbling. She let out a giggle. He grinned and kissed her, stifling it. Despite the arms and legs flailing everywhere, and the continuous crashing of heads, they did, between them, manage to discard her skirt and shirt.

He stood back ever so slightly and took the sight of her in. His breath caught in his throat. He couldn't help but just stare. Here was perfection, standing in front of him. His hands lightly brushed her skin, following the curve of her shoulder, collar bone, breasts. His thumb rubbed around the lines of a long scar on her abdomen.

"Playing soldiers with my brother," she smiled at him. "I won."

He smirked at her. _Of course._

Sarah leaned in and rested her forehead on his. "Is this really happening?" She whispered.

His eyes locked with hers. "Only if you want it to," He whispered back.

"Always."

He kissed her again then. But this time, more intensity than lust. This was the explosion after the slow burning fuse had been lit in Aldbourne. Pent up emotion. Passion. The intensity of it was so liberating. The freedom to discard the worlds, and his own, view of himself and how he should act. All he knew was that right now he wanted her. He needed her. And she needed him.

And for this one moment, nothing else mattered.

* * *

Oh. My. God. I actually wrote that last bit about 3 weeks ago. Do you hate me for not sharing sooner? I hate myself for not sharing sooner. Anywho. Of course, the rollercoaster isn't over. In fact, if anything, it starts to get a whole lot more interesting!

Reviews are love.


	11. Coffee and Croissants

**A/N:** Clearly this has been a long time in the making! No excuses. Life got in the way, but I'll be honest and let you know this story has never been far from my thoughts (and heart). Let me assure you, this baby will get finished this year. I'm currently writing a chapter ahead of myself, so there will always be something up my sleeve to give you.

Anyway, please enjoy this chapter! I am hoping that I have stayed true to my original characters. If you haven't read this for awhile, I suggest going back to the start and reading it again. I did, and fell in love with my own story! That's pretty solid motivation to finish it, I think!

* * *

**Chapter 11: Coffee and Croissants**

**_Paris, 7th December, 1944_**

She had been lying there still for some time. Awake, but not wanting to move, for fear it was all but a dream. The rhythmic flow of soft air on the back of her neck. The hand on her thigh. The closeness. Her skin still held the memory of his touch.

_She stood in front of him, vulnerable. Here she was, flaws exposed. His hand reached forward and she felt the warmth of his hand tracing her shape. The focus in his eyes._

_The soft heat of his fingers reached her body. She felt herself draw her breath in. He took no notice, his gaze transfixed on her._

_His hand moved slowly, but deliberately, down her body, until it stopped at a long scar on her abdomen. He looked at her questionably._

"_Playing soldiers with my brother," she smiled at him. "I won."_

_He gave her one of his trademark grins; that twinkle in his eye._

_The reality of what was this all meant hit her. She leaned into him. "Is this really happening?"_

_Those green eyes pierced her gaze. "Only if you want it to."_

Her hand brushed against her lips, remembering. Swollen.

"_Always."_

_Whatever this was, whatever it was to be, she needed it. Wanted it._

_His mouth came down on hers, and his body pushed hers against the wall. His patience stripped away. His strength was exhilarating._

_He lifted her up, and carried her to the bed. Gently, but surely, he lowered her onto the soft mattress. He stood tall over her, as she reached out and touched his chest._

_Quickly, she grabbed his forearm, pulled him towards him, and wrapped her legs around him. In one quick movement she had him on his back. She leaned in: "he will win who, prepared himself, waits to take the enemy unprepared."_

_She felt his laughter reverberate in his chest. She smiled widely at him and let out a laugh. At that moment, he pushed her up, flipped her onto her chest, and lay down on top of her. "He will win who knows how to handle both superior and inferior forces," he whispered in her ear._

_She turned over and faced him. "Oh, inferior am I?"_

"_You? No." He shook his head. "Me."_

_She pulled him close, and wrapped her legs around him._

_The intensity of their need burnt a hole through their souls._

She sighed at the memory and relaxed into his embrace. The rhythmic breathing changed. "Stop squirming."

She froze. His voice caught her by surprise.

"Did you just follow my order?"

A smile spread across her face. "Don't get used to it, Captain."

She felt his arm wrap around her stomach, pulling her closer. His lips softly left a trail down her neck, moving to her shoulder...

... _Knock knock_. A rap at the door interrupted his movement, the spell broken. "Petit déjeuner!"

"Shit. What's the time?"

She turned over and looked at him. "For the first time in years, I don't know or care."

"You'll care soon enough. I told them to come in and wake me if I didn't answer."

She sat up, pulling the sheet around her. "Well I'm not answering!" She gave him a push, and he tumbled out of the bed with a thump. Fumbling around the floor, he found his trousers.

"Er, coming!" He shuffled towards the door, banging his toe on a chair. "Shit!" She let out a laugh. He turned and glared at her.

_Knock knock._ "Monsieur?"

"Um, à venir!" Making it to the door, he glanced back at Sarah with a smirk on his face, and then opened it slightly, ensuring that the stewardess did not see her.

"Bonjour!" She could see the door move, and then a mumbled voice. Dick put his hand out. "Non, non." He stuck his foot on the outside of the door, trying to stop the girl. Sarah saw a hand touch his chest, followed by a high pitched giggle. This caught him off guard, and the door quickly opened, with a young girl advancing towards Dick.

Sarah cleared her throat. The young girl stopped, and turned to look at where the noise had come from. Sarah smiled and waved. "Bonjour, jeune fille."

The girls face drained of all colour. "Je suis désolée!" Flustered, the young girl gave Dick control of the breakfast trolley, and swiftly left, closing the door loudly behind her.

Dick grinned at her. "Croissant?"

* * *

_Well, I did not expect that._ One second the young girl was in front of him, the next, she was advancing, a look of lust crossing her face. She stopped, just as her hand got a bit too close for comfort.

He turned his head to Sarah waving, her messy morning hair cascading around her face. "Bonjour, jeune fille." He heard a rustle of movement, and then the room was still. His eyes stayed on her. Slowly a smile crossed his face, and he picked up a pastry. "Croissant?"

She laughed. "Did you organise that too?"

"Yes, clearly she was my back up plan."

The look on her face suggested that he'd pushed it too far. "Oh, is that what I am, is it?" Her eyes twinkled, giving her away. All of a sudden a pillow came crashing at his face.

"Maybe I deserved that." _I definitely deserved that. _"But I have food, and coffee."

She drew her knees up to her chest, the sheet barely covering her. "Well don't just stand there, bring it here!"

He pushed the trolley to the bed, and sat down next to her. The morning light framed her face, and he realised he had been holding his breath. He leaned in and kissed her tenderly. "Good morning."

"Mm, good morning." She rested her head on her knees. "How did you sleep?"

"Well, very well. Better than I have in a long time." He started pouring coffee into a cup. "You?"

"Much the same. I must have been pretty tired."

He smirked and raised his eyebrow. "Must have been all that running." She snorted as he handed her a cup of coffee. As he did, he noticed her face getting flushed. _Is she embarrassed?_

He studied her closely as she sipped her coffee. She tucked her hair behind her ear, and her eyes looked up at him. She cocked her head to the side, like she always did when she was thinking. _What is she thinking?_

She looked around her and used her free hand to pull the sheets further around her. _No, not embarrassed. Bashful?_ He reached out, took the coffee from her hand, and placed it back on the trolley. "You are beautiful."

She smiled shyly at him. _Does she believe me?_ He leaned forward and kissed her forehead, her nose, her lips. "You are so beautiful."

Her arms wrapped around his neck. "I wish we could just stay here forever."

_I wish we could too. _"I'm not sure you really mean that."

She faced him now. "Everything is just so simple here with you." She sighed and rubbed her temple. "I've made such a mess out of everything."

_Not everything._ "That's not true. Besides, my memory of last night suggests otherwise..."

"Yeah but I can hardly parade that around back in with the boys."

He looked up at her. "What do you mean?"

"Come on, Dick. You know exactly what I mean. A female soldier, the only female soldier, sleeping with the Captain of the Company she is attached to?"

He felt his heart ache a little. "Well I would've thought that this was more than that..."

Her hand grabbed his. "Of course it is. But it doesn't matter." _Why not? _She read his mind. "Dick, do you know how hard I worked to get to this point? To a point where I'm not just tolerated, but I'm actually accepted by the men as one of them? If they found out..." _Right._

"I'm not going to say anything, but..." He shrugged and grinned lopsidedly. "... I suspect Harry and Nix will go on a fishing expedition when I get back." _Understatement of the century._

She chuckled. "Good point. And knowing Nix, your young French maid was probably doing some spying for him."

_I wouldn't put it past him, _Dick thought. _"_What if I only told him part of the story? Give the man what he thinks he needs to hear."

Dick could see her considering it. "As long as it goes no further than those two. If it does..."

He smiled at her. "Sarah, it won't. Nix may scheme, but he's a friend. To both of us, in fact. It'll be fine."

"Okay, so what do you tell him?"

"Well..." He knew the thoughts of last night were showing on his face, and his smiled. "... let's just tell him we kissed."

"Kissed?" Her hand travelled up his chest, her fingers drawing circles along the way.

_What is she getting at? _"What do you mean?" He could feel the heat rising up his neck.

"Well, there are plenty of kisses I remember. Which one are we talking about?"

He pulled her closer. "Maybe you should remind me which ones I have to choose from?" He kissed her slowly, gently, and he felt the sheet slip down her skin.

_Coffee and croissants can wait._

* * *

Later that day, after they had managed to drag themselves out of bed, Dick and Sarah went for a walk to find some afternoon tea. It was their last chance to spend some time together, before they had to head back to the reality of the situation; the reality of war.

In some ways Dick was upset that he couldn't shout from the rooftops that she was his, to let Nix and Harry know every detail. _For everyone to know how amazing it was._ But he understood, not just from her point of view, but his own, that it was something they needed to keep between themselves. They were both in positions in authority, charged with protecting those men that they led. If anyone thought that their judgement was compromised; if they lost of the respect of their men; if their superiors believed they were no longer focused on the job; it would mean trouble.

Sarah sighed. Dick turned to see her deep in thought. Her happiness was wearing off as she got closer to returning to camp. _Something is clearly troubling her._ Oddly, despite all that had happened in the last 24 hours, Dick still felt a barrier, that she still had a secret place she receded to in herself and that he did not have permission to enter.

_Stop being stupid._ He shook his head at his doubts, pushing them out of his head. "Are you okay?"

He could see her considering whether to tell him. Seemingly resigned, she looked at him. "Roo. I'm thinking about Roo."

_Oh._

"I just don't know what to do. What was he thinking, Dick? How am I supposed to work with him now?"

_Maybe I should tell her?_

"I can't believe how selfish he is. He clearly doesn't care about me at all. If he did, he wouldn't have done it. He wouldn't have put me in this position."

_I should tell her._ He took a deep breath. "Sarah, he's not selfish."

She snapped her head towards him. "What?"

"He cares about you. It was his idea you come to Paris."

The look on her face made him stop in his tracks. Her face immediately softened. "Oh..." she said quietly, barely audible. She touched her lips, tracing them with her finger. He could see she was thinking. And it was pretty clear to him what she was thinking about.

_I shouldn't have told her._

* * *

Sarah was on the back of a truck, rumbling down the road on the short journey back towards Camp Mourmelon. The further into the trip she got, the more of a sinking feeling she got in her stomach. She would have felt much better with Dick by her side, but he had one more night in Paris. Besides, it was best that they didn't arrive back together. _It's going to be hard enough managing Nix._

While she was, well, happy, about being with Dick, she knew that they were in dangerous territory. _We're in the middle of a war for Christ's sake! _They needed every ounce of focus just to keep themselves, and more importantly, their men, alive. Would this be too much of a distraction? Would growing this close jeopardise their judgement?

It was too late now anyway. _Not that I would want it to change, even if I had the chance._ No, she didn't regret it. The issue of how they act now was something they could manage. But they both knew that their priority was to be their men.

And then Roo. _I don't even know where to start with that._

She looked to her side and saw her package, still unopened, sitting on top of her duffel bag. She wasn't sure what she was so scared about. But she had promised herself. _I have to stop running_. She took a deep breath and picked it up. _Here goes._

She untied the string, and brown wrapping quickly, fearful she wouldn't follow through with it. Inside were some photos, and a small folded note. Tentatively her fingers picked up the note. As she unfolded it, she saw her mother's cursive writing. Tracing the letters, she read the note out loud.

"He waka eke noa. Kia kaha." A private in front of her looked up. She choked back the tears and smiled at him. She looked back at the note, her eyes blurry. _A canoe which we are all in with no exception. Be strong._

She started looking through the photos. The first was a photo of her and her father. _I remember this. We travelled into the city._ She was wearing her best clothes. Her father held her close, smiling cheerfully. She let out a small chuckle. _Everything was happier when he was alive._

The next was harder to look at. It was a photo of Charles and her, a few days before they left New Zealand. She had, in fact, sent this very photo to her mother. He was taller than her, and his presence could be felt beyond the realms of the photo. Her heart felt like it was caving in. She bowed her head. _I miss you. You were a true leader, in every sense of the word. Men would follow you anywhere._

Sarah sighed. What about her men? She had some work to do to make sure they knew she had her head in the game. She hoped that just coming back refreshed would count for something. But she couldn't rely on just that. She had to prove herself to them again.

She sighed again. She knew that her real problem was Roo. _God, where do I start? _She thought back to a conversation earlier that day with Dick. When he admitted it was Roo's idea for her to go to Paris, straight away she had felt ashamed at how she had treated him since he kissed her. Like somehow, deep down, she knew that he did care for her in a genuine way, that it wasn't just a show. All she had needed was that confirmation.

_How hard must it have been for him to kiss her? _After all, she'd never seen him admit feelings towards, well, any of the multitude of women he'd cavorted with. Not one iota. Yet there he was, admitting he loved her? As more than just a friend.

And on top of that, she knew that he would have had to go to Dick to get her pass to Paris. She knew he was intensely jealous of Dick, she had seen it in his eyes. Yet, he had swallowed his pride, for her.

But then there was Dick. Stoic, strong, genuine. For the first time, someone she was immediately drawn to. Connected with emotionally. _And physically._ She blushed. _I want him. But I don't want to hurt him. _

Suddenly, a bump in the road. The photos went flying. "Shit!" She scrambled to the floor, trying to gather them. Satisfied, she sat them back in the box.

"Ah, Lieutenant?" She snapped her head up towards the voice. "You forgot one."

She took the photo from the reached out hand. "Thank you, Private."

As she placed it into the box, she glanced at the writing on the back. _Mine?_ She pulled it closer. _No, it's māmā's. _She read it quietly. "James and Sarah, Egypt 1944. She is happy." Slowly she turned the photo around. She saw herself and Roo, his arm around hers, and her leaning into him. _I do look happy._

A flood of memories washed over her. Despite being in the middle of a war, she had never felt alone. Never felt unsafe. She knew it was mostly down to Roo. She owed him so much. And what about that kiss? She touched her lips, remembering. Remembering how she had, even for just a second, kissed him back. The resulting anger. And now, confusion.

She searched her feelings. _Dick means everything. _But she could feel the tension in her heart. _But so does James._

She sighed yet again. _Well, so much for not getting distracted._

* * *

**_Mourmelon le Grand, 8th December, 1944_**

As soon as she had gotten back to camp last night, she had gone straight to her quarters. She didn't fall asleep right away. No, instead she sat up, staring at photos. That photo.

That morning she had gotten up early, and methodically gotten ready for the day. The first thing was to see Captain Ryan. For the most part, it went pretty well. They had a lot of work to do that week, which she was looking forward to. It was her chance to get her head back in the game.

However, the gods just didn't want to let go of Roo. Just before she left, Captain Ryan shut the office door, and turned to her.

"_What's the issue with you and Sergeant Clarke?"_

"_Nothing."_

"_Don't bullshit me. You've barely spoken a word to each other."_

"_I apologise if it is unprofessional." She sighed. "We had an argument. I need to speak with him but I've not had the chance."_

"_Well find it, Lieutenant."_

Now, she was on her way to the mess tent. What she needed right now, was the company of the Easy men. Removed from everything, she felt like she'd find some solace here.

She walked into the tent to immediately be met by a flurry of greetings. After being bombarded by questions about Paris ("_What are the women like?_" "_Seriously Malarkey, do you really think that was my main concern?_") she settled at a table next to George Luz. She needed a bit of humour right now.

As soon as she'd sat down, George wrapped his arm around her and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "We missed you, kid."

She snorted. "Kid? Are you serious?"

"Hey, hey." He put his arms up in mock surrender, "it's a compliment. You know, you look real young."

"Right, so what you're saying is that while I'm an old woman, at least I look young."

"Ahh..."

Bull interrupted. "What he's trying to say, Lieutenant Price, is that it ain't been the same without you here."

She smiled. "Thanks Bull."

George turned to her again. "How was Paris? I heard Marlene Dietrich was in town. You see her?"

"Honestly George, no. I spent most of my time in bed." _That's not exactly a lie._ At that exact moment she looked up and saw Roo entering the mess tent. She gave him a small smile, and nodded.

"He's been a bit quiet lately."

She turned her head to face Bull. "What do you mean?"

"He ain't been drinking, for one thing."

"Or talking." Luz added. "Usually you hear him as soon as he comes into a room. Now, you barely notice he's there."

She frowned and looked at them both. "Right."

George looked at Bull and raised his eyebrow. Bull shrugged back at George. She noted his communication between them nervously.

"So ah, Lieutenant."

"Yes, Luz?"

"What's going on between you two anyway?"

She dropped her head. _Christ. Why is everything suddenly about him?_

* * *

**_Mourmelon le Grand, 10th December, 1944_**

Dick had been back at camp for a couple days. He hadn't seen Sarah much, but he didn't mind. He knew she would be busy training with her troopers. Besides, they had managed to share a few stolen kisses, every now and again. These had made him feel more certain about what they shared. But every now again doubts crept in. _Especially when I remember her face when she was thinking about that kiss._

He scratched his head, looked at the office around him and sighed. _Paper, paper and more paper._ He had buried himself in it since returning, but it was never ending. At his lowest points, he felt like the Sisyphus, getting so close to finishing, when suddenly another batch of papers arrived. There simply was no end.

"You think too much Dick."

Nix.

"How was England?"

"Oh you know, I got what I came for." He sat down, resting his feet on the desk. "How was Paris?"

_Well he didn't waste any time._ "It was French."

"Oh come on, Dick. Don't hold out on me. We didn't go to all that effort for nothing."

Dick smirked and leaned back into his chair. "Well that all became pretty clear."

"Ah so you did bump into each other. Tell me, how is Miss Price?"

He rolled his eyes. "Seriously Lew, could you be more obvious?"

"There are no ulterior motives with my question at all, Dick. Unless of course, you are forgetting to share something?"

_Just tell him what he thinks happened._ "You're not going to stop are you?"

"No."

"Fine. We kissed. That's it."

Nix leaned forward sharply. "Seriously?"

Dick felt a confused look cross his face, his eyebrows furrowing. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"To be honest, Harry and I weren't entirely sure if you had it in you. Well, to be fair Harry did but then he's always been a sentimental bastard."

_Well this is easier than I thought it would be. _Dick shook his head and chuckled. "If I'd known you weren't expecting it I would have kept my mouth shut."

"Too late now, Dick." Nix tapped a pencil on the desk. "So, how 'bout that Sergeant Clarke?"

Dick's head snapped up. "I haven't spoken with him."

"I'll reword. How do you think he feels now that he's officially out of the picture?"

_Should I tell him?_ "Honestly Lew, I'm not sure he is."

"What do you mean?"

"The day we left Paris, it just seemed like she had doubts."

"You're over thinking it. She kissed you right? She didn't kiss him. That's all the proof you need right there."

_Maybe. _"How do you figure that?"

"Oh you know, the intellectual power of the Intelligence Officer. So..." Nix tapped a pencil on the desk. "... just a kiss, huh?"

_Was that not enough?_ "Yeah, just a kiss." He grinned. _Kisses._ He could feel himself drifting off into the memory.

Nix got up. "I'll forgive you for thinking too much this time Dick." He chuckled as he paused at the door. "This time."

* * *

**_Mourmelon le Grand, 12th December, 1944_**

She'd been back for a few days, and had been busy from the get go. Now that both she and Ryan were back, they had been busy training, reconsolidating, replacing. Every day she was up at 5am, every night she was collapsing into bed at 11pm. _I thought this was supposed to be R&R?_

Tonight, she had managed to stay awake to complete some paperwork. _So much paperwork._ She smiled. The last time she'd seen Dick he had his head hanging over a typewriter, concentrating. At first, she hesitated when she saw him, second guessing herself. But she'd only had a minute. So she pushed the doubt to the side, strode in, looked behind her to make sure no one was watching, planted one on him, and quickly went back out the door. The kiss gave her butterflies.

She had butterflies now too. She wasn't sure if it was nervousness or excitement. But it was definitely there, and it was because she was on her way to see Roo. _James_. She had wanted to speak with him as soon as she got back, but, well, she didn't. She had tried hard to engage, but there was a barrier there. She knew the men had noticed, but they said nothing to her. Of course, Captain Ryan had been a different story.

She kept coming back to that feeling. It was clear that she had been so blinded by her anger that she had completely neglected the fact that she did kiss him back. It wasn't completely one-sided. That meant something, although what, she had no idea. And then there was Nix, who just that night, had bailed her up about the whole situation. ("_Make a choice, get your answer, Sarah."_)

And so she was. She needed to see him alone. But not just to speak with him.

Sarah walked up to his door and took a deep breath in. _This is it._ She opened the door, and immediately tripped up on a leg. "Roo?"

Turning on the light she saw that while his top half was asleep on the bed, apparently getting his legs up was too hard. She couldn't help but laugh.

"Saz?"

She sat down next to him and he looked at her, with a dazed look on his face. "What are you doing here?" He sat up and looked around, seemingly confused at the timing. "Is it morning?"

"No, it's not."

"Are you okay?" He placed a hand on her shoulder.

_Always looking after me._ "I'm fine. Well, no I'm not, but we'll get to that." She smiled at him. "Thank you for Paris. I know it must have been hard for you to do that."

He said nothing.

"I'm sorry for how I've treated you lately. You just..." She looked at him. "...well Christ, Roo, you could've said something! How was I supposed to take it?"

His face said it all. "I don't know. All I know is that I've felt this way for a long time." Suddenly he looked annoyed. "But seriously, how would I have said it. 'Hi Saz, turns out all those jokes about thinking you're a real dish were actually true?'"

They sat in silence. _Just get on with it._

"I think I love Dick."

His face froze.

"But I..." _Deep breath. _"I think I love you too." She leaned forward. "I've just... I've just got to try something."

And so she kissed him. Gently at first, exploring his mouth. Then Roo responded. She felt his intensity. As he leaned in towards her, she drew back and looked at him. Smiling, she got off the bed, and walked out of his room without a word, leaving him staring at her.

She had her answer.

* * *

A/N: Extra thoughts. I've tried very hard to strike a balance with the Paris stuff so it is not super explicit and keeps some suggestion. I am hoping I've struck that (let me know).

That last scene. That's been planned since, well, the first Roo/Saz kiss. How will this change the dynamic? Well don't you want to know! Watch this space.

Review please lovelies. Xx

_(Updated 25 February 2013: fixed some typos)._


	12. I Will Have Neither

_**A/N:**_While I enjoyed writing the previous chapter, this one was a real blast. Hope you enjoy.

* * *

**Chapter 12: I Will Have Neither**

_**Mourmelon le Grand, 13th December, 1944**_

Sarah strode across to the mess tent with purpose. After a restless night of thinking, she had made a decision and she was going to stick to it.

It's not that she had regrets, far from it. She loved them both, and she wanted them both in her life. But it wasn't fair on any of them.

_I will have neither._

Surprisingly, despite the internal heartache, her head was clear and focused. Eventually, they'd forget.

_I am here to do a job._

She held her head high and kept her shoulders back.

_I will do my job._

Last night, she remembered her oath. That she is an officer, charged with a duty. That she swore to faithfully serve.

_A leader puts themselves last. I am not here for myself._

With a deep breath, she walked into the mess tent. "Heey, Lieutenant Price."

"Morning Guarnere. You givin' em hell?"

"Always Ma'am. I heard yous went to Paris. How was it?"

_Amazing._ "Relaxing. Just what I needed. Not sure if you noticed but I was starting to act a wee bit off the track."

"Well, at least yous not a base rat like our new Lieutenant."

She stepped in behind him, food getting slopped onto her tray as they shuffled down the line. "Yeah I noticed. Bit of a worry."

"Tell me about it."

They got to the end of the line. "Guess we'll see how he goes today, eh?"

Guarnere turned to her. "Don't hold your breath." He then promptly walked over to the table with the Easy men. As she stepped off towards her troopers, she nodded towards Bull and Luz.

Arriving at her table, she let out a cheery greeting. "Morning boys." She sat down next to the troopers. "All set for the ex today?"

They nodded. "Should be interesting though," Mouse added.

_Tell me about it._ She nodded towards them knowingly. "We just need to concentrate on our job, what is in our control, and do our best with everything else."

"What about the Easy boys?"

"I know. But we need to take care of ourselves first, or else when the real thing rolls around we'll all end up dead." She took a bite of her food. "Besides, I'm sure Captain Winters will keep a close eye on things, you know he won't be able to help himself. With any luck Dike will..."

Mouse coughed and Sarah turned her head to her left.

"Lieutenant Dike."

"Lieutenant Price. I trust you've sorted out your equipment for today."

_What the hell? What does he think I am, a quartermaster?_ "My men are capable of sorting out their own equipment."

"I just want to make sure it all goes to plan."

"With all due respect, Lieutenant Dike, nothing goes according to plan. However, you can rest assured that we will successfully carry out our objective."

"I'm not sure the level of training you've had, Lieutenant Price, but planning is the most important part of war. If you do not carry a plan out to the letter, then it is impossible to complete your objective." _My time on the battlefield trumps your time in the classroom, asshole._

She could feel her blood boiling. "I appreciate the concern. But you just worry about Easy, Lieutenant Dike. Enjoy your breakfast." She turned back towards the men and continued eating. After a few seconds she heard Dike's footsteps lead him away from the table.

"What a prick." Sarah looked up to see Roo, and she smiled. "Glad you could make it, Sergeant Clarke." _Glad you are talking to me._

"Ah, wouldn't miss this for the world, Lieutenant Price. Green fields and the smell of weapons discharge? Bliss."

Mouse snorted. "You're a crazy bastard, you know that Roo?"

The men all laughed. "Why do you think he was chosen to be your Sergeant, Mouse?" Sarah replied between the laughter. She shuffled over and patted the place next to her. "Warmed up a spot for you Roo."

He sat down next to her. "To be fair, that ass of yours is big enough to have warmed up both of our spots."

They all started laughing loudly, so loudly, that the other in the mess tent turned to look at what all the fuss was about. "You cheeky shit."

"That's why you love me."

_I will have neither._

The men were still laughing, but she knew that her face was now reflecting the seriousness she could see in Roos. _I am here to do a job._

She leaned in to his ear, and whispered, "Let's talk later." He nodded, and then they focused in on finishing their breakfast, and mentally preparing for the day ahead.

_I will do my job._

Looking up from her plate, she caught Dick's eye. Her heart pounded.

_I am not here for myself._

* * *

_Damn Nix._ Dick had been waiting in his office for thirty minutes for Lew to send through the intelligence paperwork for his section of the exercise. Once again, Lew was late. Surprisingly, Dick wasn't able to find him in his cot. This meant one thing. _Nix got hungry._

Dick figured that although he'd have his breakfast, it was at least an opportunity to get out of that stuffy office, and maybe come coffee. _And maybe see Sarah._

Despite his conversation with Nix the other night, he said felt like there was a barrier there. Something she was holding back, or keeping from him, or well... _dammit something._ He wanted to grab her and shake her by the shoulders.

But who was he kidding? He was head over heels. He might feel confident and calm and collected when commanding a battlefield, but she made him feel powerful and strong. Invincible.

He walked into the mess tent and spotted Nix, looking a little worse for wear, sitting on a table with Harry. Harry looked up and motioned toward Nix, rolling his eyes. _Hungover. God damn Nix._

Sitting next to Harry, he put his elbow on the table and leaned forward. "You forget to bring something to me Nix?"

"Christ Dick, it's too early in the morning for this."

"You know what, you're absolutely right." Nix raised his eyebrow. "But what do I say at 0900 when I have to pass everything on to Colonel Sink?"

"Hmph."

"Yeah, thought so. Bring it over when you've finished."

As he stood, a wave of laughter erupted from a few tables away. Looking over he saw Sarah lean in to Sergeant Clarke. He could feel his heart pounding. _It's nothing._

"Christ, do they need to be so loud?" Nix moaned, cutting through the laughter.

Dick turned to him. "You're in the wrong place if you want peace and quiet."

"Lord, I've had about enough of your self-righteousness this morning Dick." _Someone is grumpy. Must be a bad one._

"It's a good thing you're not a religious man, Nix," Harry said. "'Cause you're sure as hell taking his name in vain a lot today.

"Et tu, brute?"

Dick snorted. "0900 Lew. Don't be late." Walking out of the tent, he cast his eye over to Sarah. _It's nothing._

* * *

It was a bitterly cold morning. She hadn't appreciated just how crisp it was until her fireteam had taken their position along the bush line. A small plume of steam formed in front of her face when she exhaled. _Hopefully that doesn't reveal our position,_ she chuckled to herself.

"Lieutenant?"

"Yes Corporal Cote?"

"We've spotted the enemy. 600 yards nor'west."

Sarah eased into her Emily, and butted it against her shoulder. _There._

"Not exactly making an effort to conceal themselves, are they?" _Seems odd._ She scanned the horizon. _There is something more to this._ All of a sudden she stopped. "There, about 20 yards to the right of your original position Corporal, you see it?"

A few seconds past. "Clever bastards."

"They're setting us up." She looked up from the scope. "Make a note of everything you see. Quantity, type, location. You've got two minutes, then radio it in."

She checked her watch. 1325. _Ahead of time._

"We're just too good boys."

"Scan complete Lieutenant. Radioing Easy now."

Sarah smiled and relaxed back into her Emily. The trusty rifle fitting every curve of her body, fitting snugly into her shoulder...

..._What the hell?_ "Corporal, can you confirm Easy's location?"

"Shit, Lieutenant they're on the move."

She checked her watch again. _1329_. "What the hell is he thinking? Corporal, radio."

"Easy company, this is fireteam alpha, what the hell do you think you are doing?"

"This is Lieutenant Dike, you were late."

"Bullshit we were! You're sending your men into an ambush! Standby for further details."

"Negative, Lieutenant Price, the manoeuvre is underway as planned."

"Dike, if you do this you will be sending men to their death."

No answer.

"Lieutenant Dike!?"

No answer.

_You bloody bastard._ "Shit." _We can't do anything from here. But we have to try._ "Get your gear together, we're on the move."

"But Lieutenant, what was all that talk this morning about concentrating on our own job?"

"We completed our objective. Now it's time to do our best by Easy." She smirked. "Besides, things never go to plan, remember?"

She slung her rifle over her shoulder. "Cote, I'll take point. Williams, the rear."

They moved quickly, weighed down only by the essentials. Moving along the bush line, she knelt and called the team to a halt. She went into prone position and looked out from under the bush. _Walking straight into it._

She motioned to the boys and they continued around the flank to the Matilda. She noticed the turret was open, and that both the Loader and Gunner were standing to the side of the tank. _Morons. _

The tank was largely isolated from the remainder of the enemy party, due to their efforts to conceal it. However, just 20 yards ahead the bulk of the enemy party stood, rifles trained on the incoming Easy company.

She signalled to the boys to halt. Turning, she broke the silence and whispered just loud enough for her voice to be audible. "Let's teach 'em a lesson." Signalling again, she ordered them to go forward and silently take out the two on the outside. As was customary in an exercise, they lay face down in the dirt.

Crouching, she moved out into the open. Nodding to her team, they covered her from the flank as she climbed to the top of the turret, and knocked on the side. Hearing movement, she pulled out her side arm and crouched as she saw a head pop up. She pushed the muzzle into his chest and mouthed the word "bang."

The Commander's face admitted defeat, and he ducked back into the tank silently. She dropped in behind him, into the cramped quarters of the tank. "What's taking them so long chum?" the Driver asked, his back to her.

She aimed her pistol into the back of his head. "They're a little busy." She said in a low voice.

"Oh bugger. Well," the Driver turned. "Am I dead, or what?"

"Sure are."

She popped her head out of the turret and signalled her success to Cote and Williams. Quickly they both moved to opposing positions on the flank of the Matilda. Dropping back inside, she sat down at the driver's seat. _Back to basics, Price._

She peered into the optics and moved the main gun into position. _Time to make a point._

"Nice working with you boys." She nodded to the Brits and popped her head back up out of the turret to see Easy company surrendered. She whistled loudly and they turned towards her.

"Bang."

* * *

Back in headquarters, Sarah was standing at attention in front of Captain Ryan and Colonel Sink. And Ryan was in full swing.

"What on earth were you thinking, Lieutenant Price."

"Sir, they were walking into an easily avoidable situation. Had Lieutenant Dike actually followed his orders..."

"Never mind Lieutenant Dike! What about your orders? They were clear. You've made a mockery of this training exercise."

"Sir..."

"Did I give you permission to speak?" She quietly shut her mouth.

Ryan continued, "You know damn well that kind of bravado would never have worked against the Krauts. First of all, the plan itself would never have worked because the Krauts would never: one," he raised a finger, "leave their armour unprotected."

"Two," second finger, "be stupid enough to be outside the damn thing with the turret wide open."

"And three," third finger, "you would've broken operational silence by shooting the damn commander!"

She could feel the red on her face forming from anger and embarrassment. She opened her mouth to protest, but caught a twinkle in Ryan's eye. _Right, so this is just a show for Sink._

"Permission to speak, Sir?"

"Granted."

"Sir, you'd be right about the first two. But that third one." She could see the grin forming on his face. "To be fair, instead of shooting I would've broken his neck instead. Much quieter."

"Don't push me Lieutenant." The grin was well formed on his face now. _Good thing Colonel Sink is behind him. _"Dismissed."

"Sir." She stood to attention, saluted, and marched out the door. Carrying on down the hall, she heard Dick call out to her.

"Lieutenant Price, a word." _Bugger._

She walked into the office and saw Zielinski there. She stood at attention and saluted. "Sir."

Dick motioned for his aide to leave. Once the door was closed, a smirk broke out onto his face. "Quite the show you put on this morning, I hear."

"Word gets around quick."

"It's all the men are talking about. They're quite impressed."

She sighed and scratched her head. "Look, I know it was a stupid move, and I sure as hell wouldn't do it in an actual battle situation," _at least I think I wouldn't,_ "but did you hear about Lieutenant Dike?"

"Bits and pieces, but I can't make much sense of it to be honest."

"Dick, he effectively killed the whole damn company. We were on time, no," she corrected herself, "we were ahead of time, and he refused to listen to our recon report. According to him, we were late and so somehow that meant because 'we weren't operating according to plan' that he could ignore us completely, and send Easy to their death!"

"You're exaggerating."

"No Dick, I'm really not."

He came around and stood by her staring intently. _Please don't, please don't._

"That man is going to kill your men."

_I will have neither. _He leaned into her.

"Dick. Listen to me." He stopped.

_I am here to do a job._

She put her hand on his chest. "I'm only ever going to say this to you once. That man should not be in any position where he could put people's lives at risk. He cannot function if things don't go according to plan."

_I will do my job._

"Don't say I didn't warn you."

_I am not here for myself._

* * *

_**Mourmelon le Grand, 15th December, 1944**_

Sarah was officially the talk of the 101st. While most recognised how ridiculous the whole affair was, she had gained the respect of another group of men. On top of that, she'd been taken aside by numerous Easy NCOs, with what was (to her) over-the-top thanks for coming to their aid when they were going to be made into 'fucking mince meat' (according to Guarnere).

She tried to tell them that it was just a training exercise, that she didn't really save any lives (and if it was an actual battle situation there was essentially no hope in hell), and it really wasn't as big of a deal as they kept making out. But they kept insisting.

What really took her aback was when the notorious Lieutenant Speirs cornering her last night as she walked across to her cot.

"_Lieutenant Price."_

_She stopped, his looming figure stepping out of the darkness._

"_Lieutenant Speirs. What can I do you for?"_

_He smiled. "I heard what you did for Easy yesterday."_

"_I hardly did anything."_

"_Whatever."_

_She stayed silent._

"_It shows a lot about your character." He nodded his head at her. "Take it easy."_

_And with that, he slipped back into the shadows, leaving Sarah with her mouth gaping open in shock._

Her thoughts were interrupted. "How's the new Easy company mascot?" _Roo_.

"She is confused as to what she's done to deserve such an honour."

He sat down next to her. "Seriously Saz?"

Pulling her knees to her chest, she answered. "I honestly don't get it."

"Saz, you are so blind sometimes." She frowned at him. _What know? _"You publicly declared that you are willing to do anything for Easy, including putting your own life on the line. That's a big deal for someone not even in their company."

_Right._ "Okay well I guess that makes sense. That wasn't the intention though." She drifted into thought.

"It never is with you." _What's he getting at? That I was blind to him?_ Suddenly she felt his hand on her knee. "What was that the other night?"

_I did say we needed to talk._

"I..."

"Did you mean what you said?"

"I meant all of it." _I love you both._

"What does it all mean?"

She could feel herself choking back the tears. "Christ. Roo," she turned to him, "Without you, my spirit would evaporate into thin air. I'd cease to be the person I am. I do love you."

He squeezed her knee. "But...?"

"You are my best friend. I'll give you the love I can, but I can't give you the love you want."

He sighed, his hand slipping off her knee. "I knew that was coming. I could tell there was more to that visit that an unconditional declaration of love."

She felt an air of sadness wash over them. _"_I wish I could give you want you want," she whispered into the air, barely audible. She reached over and squeezed his hand. "You are amazing, you know that? I treat you so terribly, and stuff you around, and yet here you are. Still by my side."

Turning to her, he put his hand out and cupped her cheek. "Saz, you're the only woman I'm ever going to love. But I'm not a chump. I'd rather have you as my best friend and live with the ache than not have you in my life at all."

"You're going to make a girl very happy one day," she said, letting his hand go.

_What have I done to deserve you?_

* * *

Roo could see that she was deep in thought, her cocked head and furrowed eyebrow giving her away. He put his hand on her knee, and took a deep breath. "What was with the other night?" _Please tell me you love me._

"Did you mean what you said?"

"I meant all of it," she answered, staring into the distance. _So she loves me._

_And him._

"What does it all mean?" _Please._

He could see she was getting upset. The blood was pounding in his ears. He barely caught what she was saying until she turned to him. "Without you, my spirit would evaporate into thin air. I'd cease to be the person I am. I do love you."

The tone of her voice, the distance of her touch, the sadness in her eyes: this told him what he dreaded to know, but he had to ask. He squeezed her knee. "But...?" _It's happening again._

"You are my best friend. I'll give you the love I can, but I can't give you the love you want."

He felt like his heart had been crushed. He knew this feeling; his brain pulled down into his stomach. "I knew that was coming. I could tell there was more to that visit that an unconditional declaration of love." _You knew, deep down, that it wasn't what you were hoping._

He couldn't hear what she was saying, the blood once again drowning out her voice. _Don't lose her._ He reached out and cupped her cheek, desperately wanting to pull her close but knowing to do so would mean the end of their relationship. _Be honest with her._ "Saz, you're the only woman I'm ever going to love. But I'm not a chump. I'd rather have you as my best friend and live with the ache than not have you in my life at all."

_I can't lose you._

He didn't hear the rest.

* * *

_**M**__**ourmelon le Grand, 16th December, 1944**_

It had been one hell of a few days. Paris. Dick. _That night_. Roo. _That kiss_. Training exercise. Dike. _That fucking tank._ And then yesterday evening. Roo. She was happy that they'd been honest. Things might still be awkward, but they were better. _I have my friend back._

_Knock knock._

- "Why look, it's Lieutenant Price, Easy Company mascot."

She looked up from her typewriter. "Lew. What do you want?"

"What kind of welcome is that, Lieutenant?"

"Oh, I am so sorry." She put down her pen, stood up, and saluted. "Lieutenant Nixon, to whom do I owe the honour of your illustrious company?"

He raised his eyebrow at her. "The amount of sarcasm dripping from your lips is quite astounding." He sat down on the chair in front of her desk. "Makes a change from how, ah, professional you've been lately."

"And?"

"I miss you is all. And Harry. And Dick. Where have you been?"

_I miss you all too._

She sat down and fixed her eyes on him. "I've been busy. See, there's this guy called Hitler, not sure if you've heard of him before? Anyway, turns out he's a real asshole and doesn't want me to go home for Christmas. It ties up a lot of my time."

"Stop avoiding the question, Sarah. You're avoiding Dick."

"Not quite."

"Bullshit."

She stared at him. _How honest to be?_

"Oh come on," he said, clearly exasperated. His voice got louder. "Grow up Sarah. Stop avoiding the question, and start telling me why you are avoiding Dick. Shit, all of us even."

"Grow up?" She immediately felt the heat rise up her neck and slowly creep into her face. "Are you serious!?" She placed her palms on the desk and leaned forward. "And why? You should damn well know after you forced me to spill the other night!"

"From memory I told you to how to get your answer, and it wasn't to run away and hide in your office all damn day."

"Yeah, well, I got an answer, Lew." She quietened down and started shuffling her papers, avoiding his gaze. "The problem is that it doesn't solve anything."

"Well that makes no sense. How can getting your answer not tell you how you feel?"

"I didn't get the answer, Lew. I got an answer."

"Well, what is it?"

_What is it?_ She stopped avoiding his gaze, lifted her chin and shot a piercing look at him. "James Clarke is my spirit. Dick Winters is my soul."

He meet her gaze and stared at her silently, but intently. Then he nodded. "Tough break, kid."

Together they sat silently in the office. Then he spoke. "You still haven't told me why you are avoiding Dick."

She scratched her head. "Well, for starters it's not like I'm avoiding him as such..."

He quickly interrupted her. "Sure, but all of a sudden it's just about the job, and nothing else."

"Fine Lew, you want honesty?" She opened her drawer and pulled out a bottle of VAT69, and a couple of glasses. "Chances are if I somehow manage to make it back home, it's going to be because of the big sleep. And that's if I'm one of the lucky ones that at least manages to hold on until I get to a field hospital."

She poured the whisky into the glasses.

"...you don't know that."

"Cut the crap Lew. I'm in Special Forces. The fact I've made it this far is a miracle in and of itself and you know it." She handed him a glass. "To the enemy," she toasted.

"To the enemy." He clinked his glass with hers and had a sip. "I don't understand what this has to do with Dick."

They sat silently again. _What does it have to do with him? Everything._ "I love him, Lew." He looked at her, no look of surprise crossing his face. _Is it that obvious?_ "But it doesn't matter, because whatever happens in this godforsaken war, I'll hurt him. If I just keep it on the level then when it is all over..." _When I die._ "...I'll quickly be forgotten."

She could feel the tears start to stream down her face.

"You underestimate how much Dick loves you, Sarah."

"I know."

"You need to tell him."

"I know."

All of a sudden Lew appeared in front of her. "Come here kid." He embraced her warmly. After a few minutes, he let her go.

She looked at him. "It's just so complicated," she whispered.

"You're wrong, Sarah. Love is the simplest thing of all. It's this goddamn war that's complicated. Look," he grabbed by her shoulders. "Just tell him the truth. Tell him what you just told me. Fate will take care of the rest."

* * *

_**M**__**ourmelon le Grand, 17th December, 1944**_

When Sarah heard that they were showing a film that night, she was immediately excited. It was still such a novelty to her. _How odd,_ she asked herself, _that I have seen more films while at war than the rest of my life? _Her next thought was to go find Dick, so they could see it together. Mentally she hit herself as soon as the thought had crystallised. Not only was it a terrible idea to be seen together in front of the men, but she still hadn't summed up the courage to speak with him about how she was feeling.

So instead, she had waltzed down to the hall with none other than Sergeant Muck. She had gone to find Malarkey, but instead wound up loaning him 50 bucks to cover a craps loss. Malarkey had attempted to insist she go with him for 'goodluck', but in the end, John Wayne and Marlene Dietrich won out. So she (literally) kissed the money goodbye, and then Skip took her by the arm and escorted her down to the hall.

She was glued to the film then entire time. She found herself getting swept up in the fantasy: "_I wonder what I would look like with curls?_", "_what a pretty dress"_ and other assorted feminine thoughts, that if she had spoken allowed would have elicited some interesting looks and comments.

The only time she was distracted was because of Luz, bless him, who provided additional entertainment throughout the film with his commentary. The men, however, were less than amused (they were clearly serious film goers). She couldn't help but laugh every now again, which seemed to just goad Luz into being more loud and obnoxious.

"Look at me, I'm John Wayne. The costume department set me up with these navy whites, whaddya think?" He turned and winked at Sarah.

Toye and Lip turned around, looking like they were about to bop him. "Shut up," "I'm trying to watch this."

She couldn't hear what Luz replied, but it didn't seem to satisfy Lip. "Well I haven't so shut up."

All of a sudden, in a rush of excitement, Malarkey came storming in (attracting more annoyed looks from Toye and Lip) and planted himself next to them. "Hey guys, where you been I've been looking all over for you."

Skip beat her to the reply. "Well Don, I was at home in Tonawanda but Hitler started this whole thing so now I'm here." She noticed Malarkey was fidgeting, and a smile was broad across his mouth.

"How'd you go in the craps?" She asked him, suspicious of the glee radiating off him.

"Not so bad. Here's the 60 bucks I borrowed, Skip." He handed over cash to Skip, "and the 50 bucks I borrowed from you, Saz."

Skip looked puzzled. "You're paying us back?" He looked up to Sarah, and then down to the money, and then back to Malarkey."

"And..."

Sarah let out a low whistle as Malarkey waved a wad of cash around. "Jesus," Skip added.

"I was up 6 grand but ended up with 36 hundred." A raft of curses and shushes were thrown in the direction of Malarkey. As she cringed she saw movement out of the corner of her eye. Turning, she saw it was Dick, coming in to enjoy the film. He stopped for a moment, a grin forming on his face, before proceeding to sit behind Buck.

She turned away and looked at the film, a smile firmly planted on her face. In turning she saw that George Luz was staring at her knowingly. He raised his eyebrow and puckered up his lips to her. She leaned in to him (by this point the look on his face turned to surprise) and then gave him a small slap. He jolted back unexpectedly, crying out "shit" as he lost his balance on the chair.

Sarah laughed quietly and shrugged at him. He turned back around, and started reciting the film again. "Got a penny?" He got louder. "Got a penny?" And again. "Got a penny?"

She kicked the back of the chair, but at the same time the lights all turned on and the film off. Luz spun around, "what did you do?"

"Me, nothing!"

Sarah saw uniforms marching past her in the aisle. She looked at Dick, who's stoic face revealed nothing. He shook his head, confirming it. _What's this all about?_

"Quiet. I said be quiet! Elements of the 1st and the 6th SS Panzer Division have broken through in the Ardennes forest. Now they've overrun the 28th Infantry and elements of the 4th. All officers report to respective HQs, all passes are cancelled."

The room broke out into more noises at the cancelled passes (although she knew deep down it was more than that). She didn't listen to much else after that. Skip patted her on the shoulder as he got up. "You coming?"

"No, not yet." She smiled at him.

"Alright, be seeing you Lieutenant."

"You too, Sergeant."

The room quickly emptied, and she found herself sitting alone. Her feet felt as heavy as stone. It didn't make sense that they'd be going with Easy. Protecting the lines wasn't something that they would be spending their time on. _I doubt we'll be going with them. _She stood up, deep in thought, and met the searching eyes of Dick Winters.

She slowly walked to him. With Buck having walked past, the room was now empty. Time seemed to slow down as her heart tried to leap out of her chest. _Tell him the truth._ She stood close to him, not daring to touch him.

_What is the truth?_

She squeezed his hand. "I'm scared, Dick," she admitted. "I don't want to lose you."

"You won't."

"Maybe we should just..." she swallowed.

"No." _He seemed to read her mind._ "We shouldn't."

"I don't want to hurt you."

"Sarah, just do me a favour, and stop letting your head complicate everything."

That got her attention. He promptly kissed her, just softly, but it was long and full of promise, full of hope.

The words that they were both too scared to say, stayed silent, instead left to radiate through their bodies.

_I love you._

* * *

She's a pretty long chapter, but this seemed to be the best fit to end it.

Reviews are love xx


	13. All the Queen's Men

**A/N:** So my husband was unexpectedly able to come home for the last two weeks, hence taking longer to get this out. He is in the military and is posted a few hours away from home, so usually I only see him every few weeks on a weekend. I'm sure you can understand me wanting to spend some time with him

Before I go on, a big thank you to **Crazyforkasey** and **Agent007Tomato** for the lovely reviews, I really appreciate it. Just knowing that someone is reading and enjoying what you are doing provides great motivation, so thanks. Keep it coming!

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen: All the Queen's Men**

_**M**__**ourmelon le Grand, 17th December, 1944**_

Dick hadn't let on earlier that he knew about her conversation with Nix. He didn't need to. Her internal struggle was pretty clear. And once he had thought about it, really reflected on it, he knew there was no way in hell she would have given herself completely to him if she didn't want him.

No, the problem was that she kept trying to do what she thought was expected of her, what she thought she needed to do, to be a leader. What she didn't realise was that without even trying she had managed to capture the respect and hearts of not only her men, but his as well.

He remembered back to when he saw her outside the pub at Aldbourne with Nix. Face flushed, laughing, joking. Enjoying herself. It was in those moments that he found her truly mesmerising. But out here it was if the weight of the world was slowly crushing her.

And now the troopers were separating from Easy Company. He desperately wanted to protect her. But he wouldn't be able to.

"Captain Winters?"

He looked up. "Yes, Sir?"

"The Krauts aren't going to go away easy. Now you make sure your men are as well supplied as possible. We could be in this for the long haul."

"Yes, Sir." He stood to attention and saluted. Returning the salute, Colonel Sink walked away towards his aide (who himself stood to attention, but his nervousness clearly showing through the slight sway of his shoulders).

_This is big. _Dick walked away, slightly troubled by the words Sink had just spoken. As soon as he had pushed off, he felt the presence of others next to him.

"Sir."

Dick turned his head. "Lieutenant Peacock?"

"Sir, have you seen Colonel Strayer?"

Dick was confused. "Where is your Company Commander?"

"Who? Lieutenant Dike, I've been looking for him all day." _Typical._ Dick should've seen this coming. He'd heard the rumours, the nicknames.

"... how is it that the fourth Army's problem gets dumped on the Airborne?" Dick cocked his head, hearing the comment. _They're expecting us to get surrounded, that's why._

"Lieutenant Peacock? Lieutenant Compton?" Suddenly Dike came marching across the gravel, the tone of his voice indicating petty annoyance. "Captain Winters."

Dick raised an eyebrow. "Oh Lieutenant Dike, I've been looking for you."

"Sir, we have a problem. Colonel Strayer has not yet returned from some wedding that he's attending in London. Can you believe that? We going to the front, we're going to the front here and our CO isn't even in the same damn country!"

_Are you kidding me? _"You have a bigger problem Lieutenant Dike, you have men returning to action without proper cold weather clothing and not enough ammo."

"Sir?!"

_How is this surprising?_ Dick could feel himself getting frustrated. "I suggest you take a canvas of the entire base get what materials we have before we roll out." He paused. "Unless you've done that already?"

"No sir," Dike replied, accepting he had been caught out.

_Well, no point in making the men suffer for his sins._ "K-rations. As many as you can scrounge. I don't know if we'll be resupplied or not."

"Yes Sir."

"What about ammo?" Lieutenant Peacock asked.

Dick turned to him. "There is no ammo. Distribute amongst the men as best you can so at least everybody has something." _It's going to be a long road._

"Yes Sir."

"Alright, Lieutenant Compton, Lieutenant Peacock, inform Lieutenant Shames of the situation. Organise the platoons and get as best equipped as you can then report back to me understood?"

"Yes Sir." "Captain."

Dick shouldn't have been surprised that instead of doing the work himself, Dike instead chose to delegate. _Good leaders don't delegate, they do the work._ He was going to have to keep a close eye on Dike.

"Lieutenant. Captain." Dick looked up, and had to concentrate to not let a smile form on his face.

"Lieutenant Price, we are busy here." Dike answered.

Raising an eyebrow, she looked at Dike in disdain. "Busy is the state of your men, Lieutenant. You look positively toasty." She motioned to the flames. _That's my girl,_ Dick thought.

Dick caught Dike staring at him, clearly expecting him to reprimand Sarah. _Except she has a point. _"Perhaps you might find it more useful to check on the status of your men," Dick could see a look of satisfaction cross Dike's face, "Lieutenant Dike." Suddenly the tension rose in Dike's face, before he saluted, and stormed off in the opposite direction.

"Congratulations for pissing off my Company Commander." He grinned at Sarah.

"Oh, I'm pretty sure that one is all on you, Captain."

He smiled. A quietness fell on them, but he could feel her eyes intently watching him.

"We won't be far."

_Won't be?_

"We'll be primarily based in Bastogne, doing some recon and gathering intelligence. Perhaps a few sniper runs." He looked up to see her shrug. "Not exactly used to being surrounded, but otherwise same shit, different day, right?"

"Don't worry, there are plenty of around who are used to it."

She stepped in close beside him, and put her hands out over the flame. "We won't be far," she repeated. She then turned to her side, glanced around, and quickly gave his hand a squeeze. "I won't be far."

As she went to step off, he gripped her hand harder. Her eyes pierced through his, a brief look of concern crossing her face. "Stay safe." She nodded, and then he released her hand, watching her walk away; wishing her to turn back; but knowing she wouldn't.

_Stay safe._

* * *

_**Due East of Neffe, Belgium, December 18**__**th**__** 1944**_

It had only been a day, but she was already exhausted. As soon as they had made it into the town of Bastogne in the early hours of the previous day, it was clear that they were in this for the long haul. She had barely managed an hour of quality sleep.

Within the first few hours of being in Bastogne her fireteam were on the move to Neffe. Here, they rendezvoused with Lieutenant Colonel Cherry and his headquarters. Orders were simple: "we are aware of activity to the east. We need further intelligence as to what exactly is heading our way."

And so here they were, in the bitter cold, heading east looking for... well, the enemy.

She heard a rustle next to her. "We've found fresh tracks."

"How far?"

"Just about two clicks to the east."

"Any idea how many?"

"Unsure. Definitely armour, but the tracks are so boggy you can't gauge the amount on foot."

_Damn, we need to know the strength._ She sighed. "We're going to have to take a closer look. No way will Cherry be happy with that." She picked up her rifle, and slung it over her shoulder. "Mouse, lets RV with Roo and Cote. From there, we'll need to proceed further east to see if we can't get numbers."

They slowly moved through the trees, aware of their precarious situation. As far as they were aware, they were behind enemy lines. If they got caught, there wouldn't be much they could do to get free. Patience and silence were key.

Thankfully, it didn't take long for them to find Roo and Cote, who were crouched in amongst a small tree line. She felt a sense of relief in seeing Roo; in this circumstance, there was no one else she'd rather have by her side.

She knelt in beside him. "Sitrep?"

"There is definitely movement, but it's sporadic. The way they are manoeuvring; they're definitely planning something."

She furrowed her brow and nodded. "We're going to have to look further. If they're on the move, we can't let them catch us out. Time isn't on our side."

"Right you are."

"Alright, Mouse take point. Cote, bring it up the rear. All eyes boys."

Mouse set a solid pace. But they didn't have to go far. Barely one mile to the East, Mouse motioned for them to halt and go to ground. Sarah leopard crawled the four feet to him. He motioned directly in front of him. Sure enough, a squad of German soldiers had congregated alongside an even larger formation of tanks.

She noticed their insignia. "Fuck," she muttered under her breath. _Panzer Lehr. _"We've got to report back to Team Cherry HQ immediately."

She returned back to Roo and Cote, and relayed their observation. "Panzer Lehr; it looks like the bulk is coming through now. We need to get to Neffe before they do."

Mouse appeared at her side. He opened his mouth to speak, but another voice stopped him. Germans. And by the sound of it, they were alerted to their presence.

"Move!" Sarah hissed.

They started to slowly back away from their position, but Sarah could hear the characteristic sound of snow crunching under boots. And it wasn't theirs. She knew they were being followed. In their haste they were unable to properly cover their footprints. _It's only a matter of time._

Suddenly she grabbed Mouse's shoulder and they veered off to the left. "We need to disperse our prints," she huffed. After a few metres, they too split.

She could feel them getting closer. Fortuitously, she sighted a dense area of growth by a tree. She ran a track past it, just enough to keep their attention, but not enough to see her getting stuck without cover. Quickly she back tracked, rubbing the snow over her foot prints.

Sitting with her back hard against the tree trunk, she struggled to slow her breathing. Her breath was pounding in her head, her temple throbbing.

_Settle._

She stared ahead, but started to visualise home. The beach, the water. Then home. She was carrying a large plate of food outside, to a table filled with her family. Pāpā, māmā, Charles, and... Dick? Her eyes flicked open.

As soon as they did, she heard the movement. She started counting the number of enemy soldiers moving past her. _One, three, four, six, seven._ They moved quickly, sweeping the area.

_Seven?_

The hair stood up on the back of her neck. Her breath got stuck in her throat. Looking sideways, she saw the shoes of a kraut no less than a foot from her.

_Eight._

She tried to exhale silently, but the breath caught in her throat. Suddenly, she saw the black butt of a rifle heading for her head. She moved to the right, but it still glanced off her forehead. She saw stars.

She flung her leg out, around his boot, and pulled towards her. The German came crashing down towards her. She stuck her forearm out and caught him in the throat. She took advantage of his sudden breathlessness and flipped him on his back, increasing the pressure on his throat.

The advantage didn't last. His dizziness may have been setting in, but so was survival mode. His eyes widened. You didn't need to speak another language to see the anger burning in his eyes.

Suddenly, his fist hurled out and connected with her jaw.

The pain was immediate. But she kept her weight on him.

Another. This time in the temple.

Blackness was filling her vision. She could feel herself slipping. She could also feel him fumbling around on the ground next to her. Through the one eye that was still working, she saw the metal in his hand.

_Fuck_.

She moved off him, dodging the first thrust. She was on her back, and vulnerable. He advanced towards her. This time he had the upper hand.

Somehow, she managed to dodge the next stabs. But then she had nowhere to move. She held her left arm out, and the metal met her skin. Suddenly it was raining red, the warmth dropping onto her lips.

His eyes told a different story now. The story of a man, full of power, ready to make his final blow. But she knew better. She threw a punch right into his now exposed throat. As he lost his balance backwards, he let go of the blade, which dropped onto her stomach.

With her right hand she grasped around the handle, and pushed him backward. She followed his movement with force, and pushed her weight into him. Their faces were mere inches away. She felt his breath escape as the blade slid deeper.

His eyes became dark.

His body jerked.

Seconds passed, but to her it felt like a lifetime. Her face still hovered over his. She just sat there, breathing heavily, red droplets dripping onto his face.

She could feel herself getting heavy. She glanced to her left, and saw the snow beneath her arm soaked. _That would explain that._

She fell to her side, all too aware that she was exposed, but her energy spent. _Get up, Price._

Using her arm she pushed up, but the pain seared through her body. She collapsed deeper into the snow.

_Get up, Price._

She reached out, and pulled the dead soldier closer to her and deeper into the bush. Strangely, the body at her side was a comfort, the solid like a protective barrier.

Her breathing slowed.

She thought of home again. She still hadn't written. Fumbling around in her smock, she found her note pad. As she scribbled, she felt herself slowly slipping away.

She closed her eyes, and thought of her mother.

* * *

_**Neffe, December 18**__**th**__**, 1944**_

Roo and Cote arrived back just as Lieutenant Colonel Cherry was moving out to Bastogne. Roo, having seniority, relayed their intelligence. But he wasn't really paying attention. Mouse and Saz hadn't been at the RV point. Against all of his values, they had pushed on to Neffe.

Saz wasn't there either.

He suddenly became aware that Cherry was walking away to his truck. "Sir!"

"Make it quick, Sergeant." Cherry answered, continuing to walk.

"Sir, we need to go back for the rest of our squad."

"Negative, Sergeant, from what you've just told me I've got a formation of bloody tanks heading my way. I can't afford to give up the manpower so you can run a suicide mission."

"Sir, we can't just leave them there."

"Sergeant," Cherry stopped and turned to him, "I understand your predicament. But if I had let my men go back after their fellow soldiers on the countless occasions that we were separated, I'd not have any of them left." He continued walking to the truck. "I'll pass the news of your team on to your Captain."

Roo just stood there. His feet cemented to the ground. The anger burning in his soul. _You bastard._

"Roo!"

Hearing his name, he spun around.

"Sergeant Clarke!" He saw Mouse running towards him, a sense of relief coming over him. That was, until he realised that Mouse was running alone. He then ran up to meet him, and grabbed him hard by the shoulders.

"Where is Sarah?"

Mouse looked at him, and then to Cote. "She's not with you?" Roo shook his head in response. "Fuck."

They two of them just stood there, seemingly at a loss. He felt his heart drop into his stomach, the weight almost unbearable. _Sarah._ He knew that he couldn't just leave her.

Cote soon appeared at his shoulders. "Well," he broke the silence, "are we going after her or what?"

Roo released Mouse, and glanced at them both. "Does a bear shit in the forest?"

"What about Cherry?"

Roo opened his mouth to speak, but Mouse beat him to it. "Fuck him. I only have one CO and he'd never order me to leave a man behind."

He stared at Mouse and Cote intently. "Mates, we could get shot for this, and not just by the enemy. Do you know what you're volunteering for?"

They nodded.

"Let's move then."

* * *

_**Bastogne, December 19**__**th**__**, 1944**_

A runner had found Dick late in the night, with a summons for him to head to Headquarters as soon as possible. He can't say he was surprised; all intelligence had indicated they were likely to be surrounded soon, and he expected that this was about to be confirmed.

He arrived in Bastogne in the early hours of that morning, to be greeted by Colonel Sink. _He looks like hell_. Dark bags encircled his eyes, the once effervescent Colonel looking increasingly weary.

"Captain Winters, I see you've made it, come in."

Dick entered the makeshift office, and immediately noticed Captain Ryan also in the room. "Captain Ryan," he said, acknowledging the troop commander.

"Dick." Ryan nodded. "How are your men?"

He shrugged. "Cold. In good spirits though. Yours?" ..._Sarah?_

"Much the same." Ryan stared at him thoughtfully. "Half of them have received orders to gather intelligence on the enemy to the East." He nodded at Dick again, seemingly indicating that he knew Dick was curious as to what Sarah was doing.

"Thanks for the update, Captain."

Ryan smiled at him knowingly, and gave him a tilt of the head in response.

Just as Dick took a seat in front of Sink's desk, two officer's walked into the room. He instantly recognised the ranks (_Colonel and Lieutenant Colonel)_ but couldn't quite make out the insignia. It didn't take much to put two and two together though. The only other allied presence was the 10th Armoured Division.

What he could not guess, however, was how he fit into this equation.

Colonel Sink had already risen on the arrival of Cherry, and took no time in introducing them to him. "Captain Winters, Captain Ryan, this is Colonel Roberts and Lieutenant Colonel Cherry of 10th Armoured Division." He then motioned to the chairs in front of him. "Please, take a seat."

Dick had barely sat when Sink launched into the discussion. "Men, as you would be aware the 10th were holding Bastogne before needing our assistance to reinforce the line. After we arrived, elements of the 10th headed east to delay the oncoming German advancement."

Cherry turned slightly so that he was facing them all. "We had been receiving small snippets of intelligence that Kraut armour was moving west, but we did not have any details on enemy strength, or the number on foot. A fireteam was supplied by Captain Ryan here", he motioned, "who I immediately utilised for a reconnaissance mission to the east. It paid off, just as I was leaving they returned with intelligence that a large formation is heading our way, gentlemen."

"How long can you hold your line, Sir?" Dick asked.

"If I'm honest, Captain, I'm not entirely sure we can. The plan is to head them off at Neffe, but if we can't hold we're going to have to fall back to Bastogne."

"And you said a large formation. Any indication as to what?"

"... It's Panzer Lehr."

Captain Ryan whistled. "Are you sure?"

"Positive. Sergeant Clarke indicated they'd seen the insignia first hand."

"What did Lieutenant Price have to say about it?" Ryan inquired.

Cherry looked directly at Ryan. "She didn't return."

Dick's head snapped up and he immediately looked up at Cherry. _She didn't return?_ He felt like his guts had been wrenched out of his throat. He took a shallow breath in and looked to Ryan, who too seemed like he was in shock.

Ryan cleared his throat. "Sir, to clarify, she's been confirmed KIA? Or is it MIA?" _Please God, let there be a chance._

"MIA." _Then she's alive._

"So the men have gone back for her?"

"No, they've stayed in Neffe to provide additional support to my men." Dick could feel the blood in his veins getting hotter with every second.

"With all due respect, Sir, they are my men."

"And they are currently under my leadership until they return to Bastogne. I need them in Neffe." Dick struggled to keep quiet. _But I need her._

"We do not leave a man behind."

Cherry glared at Ryan. "They are under my command. They will stay in Neffe until ordered to do otherwise." _But she's alive. Dammit, Cherry, she's not dead!_

Ryan opened his mouth to speak, but clearly thought better of it. Dick could feel his face getting redder, his stoic demeanour becoming compromised. Dick caught Ryan's eye, only to see him shake his head.

Colonel Sink, seemingly unperturbed by the news, changed the direction of the discussion. "Captain Winters."

"Sir." Dick answered quietly.

"We're going to have to send Dog Company to Neffe. But we can't compromise our position, so you'll need to identify how to fill the remaining gaps. You must continue to hold that position."

He nodded. "Yes sir."

Dick barely noticed Cherry rise out of his chair. "If we are done, I need to return to Neffe immediately."

"Sir," Ryan spoke, "a word?" Cherry glowered in response, but still obliged by hanging back. "And Captain Winters, Doc Roe asked that I pass something onto you. Can you wait a few moments?"

_What's he up to?_

Dick headed out of the room. As soon as he felt he was out of sight, his pace quickened until he burst outside into the frigid air. He took a deep breath in.

_She can't be gone. _

_I'll find her myself._

_But I can't leave the men._

_But I can't leave her._

"Fuck it all!" Dick exclaimed, and flung his fist out.

"Whoa!" A voice muttered. Dick looked up angrily, but his stance softened when he saw it was Ryan.

"Captain." He said quietly. They stood in silence, staring at each other. It almost seemed like Ryan was sizing Dick up.

"I know there is something going on between you and Sarah."

Dick thought for a second. This wasn't the time for games. He sighed. "Yes, you could say that."

"Good." _Good?_ "It means you're not going to do anything stupid."

Well, that was unexpected.

"Those boys would never leave her, no matter what Cherry said. I can guarantee you that they've gone back for her already, and if they haven't, they're about to. I'm heading back to Neffe with Cherry."

"What can I do?"

"Like I said, nothing stupid. You stay here and do your job."

_But I can help._

"My job gives me resource. What do you need?"

"I need nothing."

Dick barely heard him. He was already considering how he could give him additional support to find Sarah. "I'll get Speirs to provide you with additional support on arrival in Neffe, maybe assemble..."

"...Dick! Listen to me, you know damn well the last thing she'd want is you to compromise your own position for her."

The anger bubbled over. "What is the damn point of these pips if I can't save her, Ryan?" He took a step forward, but Ryan grabbed his shoulder firmly.

"Get it together man."

He didn't say anything, but he didn't need to. Ryan briefly patted his shoulder, nodded, and then promptly headed off towards a waiting truck. Dick was torn.

_You knew this would be hard. _ _You knew this could happen._

He wanted to follow, but Ryan was right. He couldn't.

_Get it together? _It rolled off the tongue easy enough. But Dick could feel his insides twisting. The pain spread throughout his body.

_Please be alive. _

* * *

I found it hard to find a good place to finish off this chapter, so I hope this still satisfies. I hope you enjoy seeing Sarah back in a combat situation. Let me know what you like (or don't like!) xx


	14. The Call

Thanks to **Crazyforkasey** (you're making a habit out of this xx), **BatOutOfHell-Madness** (I try my best to update as soon as I think the chapter is ready!), and **beth rodrigues 77**(I'm so glad you find it interesting and enjoy Sarah as a character. I kind of like her too :D) for the wonderful reviews.

And also a big thank-you to all of the new readers for discovering my wee story and putting it on your story alerts (and there have been quite a few this week!) I hope it is worthy of your reading time.

And finally: have a great Easter everyone!

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen: The Call**

_**Due East of Neffe, Belgium, December 19**__**th**__** 1944**_

Her first sensation was of darkness. Prying open her eyes, she realised it was the depth of the night. _Where am I?_

She started to push herself up by her forearms, but her body responded with pain. It shot up her arm, through her collarbone, and into her head. She let out a small cry in surprise.

The pain triggered the memory. She looked to her side to see a very still, _very dead_, soldier. Her eyes traced his silhouette, and were caught by a glimmer. A blade, sticking right out of his chest.

_That's right._

She looked down at her arm. She couldn't see much. The blood had long coagulated but there was a lot of it there, dried into the material of her uniform.

She suddenly became aware of her predicament.

_I'm presumably behind enemy lines._

_I'm sitting next to a dead kraut._

_They'll be looking for him._

_I've got to move._

Moving as fast as she could, she searched the body. Finding nothing of value, she decided to take the only thing of use: the blade. Gritting her teeth, she grasped the handle and pulled. It slid out surprisingly easily.

She took a deep breath, and then went to stand. Immediately her head was sent into a spin, and she fell onto her knee. She grunted with pain, and then tried again. This time, she remained on her feet, although she could already feel the nausea starting to set in.

Willing herself on, she carefully took a step forward and sighted the footsteps in the snow from her dead kraut. She was thankful that the cover of darkness had concealed them: as soon as dawn came there would be no hiding the body. She tried to focus her eyes but it was no use, her vision was still blurry from the beating she'd manage to take. Her hearing seemed just as bad, but only because of the damn throbbing in her head.

But there was no way around it. She either waited for guns at dawn, or made a run for it now. Either way, the chances of survival were slim. But she was damned if she'd be a sitting duck. She owed more to herself, to her family, to not go down without a fight. So she took a tentative step to the west, and another, and then another. Soon enough her legs were running on automatic and with any luck they'd not take her into the path of waiting Germans.

_Luck? Since when did you count on her?_ Sarah knew she had to put more thought into her movements, but she was so disoriented. Soon enough she stumbled over a fallen branch, which sent her crashing down a small slope. She couldn't help but cry out in pain, but as soon as she did she heard the noise of soldiers nearby. _Well done, you've given your position away._

She lay on the ground, waiting for the inevitable shot. An eternity seemed to pass.

_Hera._

Her head twitched. She saw a shadow in the distance.

_Get up._

She blinked, trying to make sense of the image.

_Hera, my sister. Get up._

She let out a small gasp when the face appeared. Charles. It was Charles. A hand reached out to her. She stared at it, knowing it wasn't real, but she wished with all her soul that it was.

_Hera, they're coming. You must move._

She took the hand and pulled herself up. The voices were getting louder. But she felt lighter, more focused.

_Hera, do not give up. He needs you. Come._

She moved behind the shadow, darting in and out of the trees. The adrenalin had well and truly kicked in, as she followed Charles' every step in the snow. Her prints matched his perfectly. _I'm sure his feet were much bigger than mine. _The crunch in the snow was monotonous, in sync and rhythmic. Every movement perfectly matched.

The voices began to fade.

She started to slow.

Charles was no longer with her.

She stopped, confused. _Brother, come back. I need you._

He responded. _Do not give up. Keep running_.

She started to move again, but she knew she was slowing. Her legs were turning into jelly and each foot weighed as heavy as a bag of potatoes. But she kept pushing. No way was she going to let Charles down. Trudging through the snow, she suddenly became aware of blur of movement up ahead. Without the full use of her vision, she knew she would be useless in anything but hand-to-hand combat.

She flattened herself behind a tree, but resisted the urge to slide down it. If she sat down, she'd not be getting up. Instead she waited, trying to focus her hearing on the sound of crunching boots in the snow. The footsteps were oddly cautious. _Had he seen her? _She looked to her left, and saw the shadow passing her.

She launched herself at the figure, putting as much of her body weight behind the movement as possible. Together, they crashed on the ground and this time she screamed in pain. Her arm had landed right underneath him, the pain of the collision and the pain of the body weight too much for her to handle.

Moments passed before she realised the final blow had not come. Her ears ringing, her eyes filled with dots, she finally came to realise that this person was friend not foe: it was Roo.

"Sarah?!"

She grunted in response.

"Fuck, oh god, Sarah. Stay with me."

She could feel him fumbling around her arm, trying to get a better look at the wound.

"Damn, it's reopened." A boot landed right by her head. "Cote, here, tie this."

Sudden pressure. More pain. She jerked and her body sat up, and she grabbed Roo. "Stop stop stop!"

"Sarah, shh, I can't, we have to slow the bleeding." He held her neck. "Cote, hurry the fuck up already."

"Jesus Roo, I'm trying, I can barely see a damn thing."

Bile suddenly boiled in her belly, the heat of the acid burning through her stomach, her throat. It spewed out her mouth, the spittle coating the ground. Roo's hand rubbed the small of her back. She moaned and cursed in pain, "pōkokohua!" She felt the tugging at her arm, but oddly the pain was receding. She closed her eyes. _Just a second._

"Sarah, stay awake." She opened her eyes to see Roo inches away from her, grabbing her face with both hands. "You keep looking at me." He turned to Cote. "Where is Mouse?" _I can do this._

"Not far, he went ahead to see if anyone heard her." _Stay awake_.

"Well of course they fucking did. It's Sarah; she's as loud as a laughing jackass."

The tugging at her arm stopped momentarily..."Roo, have I ever told you that no one understands what you're saying?"

She smiled inwardly. Sarah raised her hand. "I do," she squeaked out. The sound of her voice sounded so foreign.

"That's my girl," she felt Roo's thumb stroke her cheek. "Cote," he snapped impatiently.

One last tug at her arm. "Okay, okay, done." Together they lifted Sarah to her feet, but the movement sent her back into a spin. The bile came up again, and she leaned over onto the snow.

A new shadow. It was Mouse. She tried to look up at him but couldn't lift her head. Instead, she kept unloading onto the snow. She could hear the mumble of them talking, but she could only catch a few words. "...noise of the tanks...", "close", "moving fast", "she can't handle it", "we've got no choice."

She felt so numb. _Charles, don't leave me._

_You don't need me._ He responded. _You have him._

Whatever it was they were talking about, they had come to some decision. She was lifted onto a back, and then they were on the move. The motion of the running surprisingly didn't bother her. It had a beat, like a drum, and it was calling to her to battle.

_Ser-rah. Ser-rah. Ser-rah._

* * *

_**North of Bastogne, December 21**__**st**__**, 1944**_

He woke up stiff and cold. His teeth even felt like they were frozen. His bones creaked. He felt far older than his 26 years. He clenched his hands and contracted his fingers in and out; trying to get some feeling into them.

He was feeling increasingly on edge as the days dragged on. Within hours of the meeting in Bastogne he received word that Dog Company was no longer needed. The Germans were in Neffe, Cherry already engaged in battle, already being pushed back. But no word of the Troopers. No word of Sarah.

When he had found out that Dog Company was to stay, he immediately knew it was because Sink thought it was a lost cause. That strategically, they needed to think big picture. It made sense. They needed to focus on what had the highest likelihood of victory. The men needed to stay here, reinforce the line, and wait for the oncoming onslaught.

It all made perfect sense.

But he still felt like he'd given up on her.

He sighed and dragged himself out of his foxhole. It was so cold. Dropping down, he started to do some push-ups, his only guaranteed way of getting some blood pumping. He pushed his breath out and he pushed into the ground, his body now in motion.

A head popped out of the nearby foxhole. "Christ, Dick, you're a bit chipper this morning."

He stopped after 20, his face now flushed, his breath at pace. He was thankful for the warmth.

"Hardly."

Lew let out a whistle. "Touché."

Dick grunted and dropped down for another set. The monotonous rhythm provided some comfort, the warmth spreading through his body. He stopped again, let out a breath, and sat down.

"I've still not heard anything," he blurted out.

"I figured."

He sighed and rubbed his head.

"I never thought I'd see the day where Dick Winters would be noticeably rattled." _Noticeably?_ He glanced at Lew. "Malarkey asked after you last night when we checked out the line. He said you seemed off."

"Right."

"Must've been some kiss, eh?"

As Dick looked sideways at Lew, his face flushed with the memory. _Right, a kiss._

Lew cocked his head. "Holy shit. Dick," he leaned in, "you _slept_ with her, didn't you?"

Dick felt his face blush further. "Shh."

"You dog!"

"Nix, shut up."

"Okay okay, it's just everything makes a little bit more sense now."

Dick stood up. "Lew, shut up. You know it's more than that."

He stalked off, taking his shaving gear with him. _Insensitive bastard._ He trudged through the snow to a quiet space. _He's right though, this not knowing is driving you crazy._ This internal battle he was having was clearly now starting to play out in the open. He had to get himself under control, and just focus.

He cracked the ice, relieved at the start of a morning ritual.

At least some things were constant in this damn war.

A crack.

He looked up and saw Doc Roe. He looked to his right and saw the fuzzy silhouette of a soldier. "Doc, Doc, Doc."

As he motioned with one hand, he picked up his rifle with the other. He turned and they slowly moved forward. He raised his rifle. "Kommen sie hier." The German stopped, and then hurriedly started pulling his pants up. "Kommen sie heir, schnell!" _He sure is taking his time._ "Schnell!"

They met the German, who had stumbled towards them. Hands held up in surrender, Dick checked for weapons. _None._ He unlooped his toggle rope from his belt and fastened the soldier's hands behind his back. "Doc, can you lead him?"

He turned and motioned forward to the soldier. Doc gave him a gentle nudge, and they started tracing Dick's steps back to the CP.

The appearance of the soldier had surprised him. He was so caught up in his thoughts that he could've missed a kraut walking right through the line. If only he knew what had happened to her. Suddenly he had a thought. "Doc?"

"Sir?"

"Do you know if Captain Ryan has returned from Neffe?"

"Sir, I've not heard anything."

He nodded. _Careful now._ "Can you please let me know if you find out if he and the troopers have returned to Bastogne."

He glanced sideways at Doc, who did not seem to have picked up on his ulterior motive. "Yes, Sir. I'll let you know if I hear anything."

Dick sighed inwardly, and felt slightly lighter. _At least I have that off my back. _

_For now._

* * *

_**Bastogne, December 22**__**nd**__** 1944**_

It hadn't been easy getting her back to Neffe, but they'd done it. Cote, however, had taken some shrapnel in his foot when they arrived in Neffe – from friendly fire – but they otherwise came through cleanly.

Sarah was a different story. The wound itself was deep, but it had missed the major arteries so by itself it wasn't serious. The issue was the sheer amount of time she'd been out there, and with the loss of blood and the beating she'd taken, she wasn't in a good way. In the light of day you could barely make out her features, her face was so swollen and discoloured.

Roo looked down to the crumbled piece of paper in his hand. _Her letter_. He had found it next to her in the snow. Immediately he knew what it was. She'd finally written home. _She must have thought she was going to die_. He felt his heart ache in his chest.

He was tempted to read it, but couldn't bring himself to do it. Whatever it contained were what she had thought were her final thoughts. It was deeply private, a direct line to that part of herself that she kept tucked away. He knew what it felt like to be betrayed, and he would not do that to her by reading it.

Hearing a creak of the floor boards, he turned his head to see Doc Roe approaching.

"Sir, how is she?"

He turned his head to look at Sarah. "She's fine. Still sleeping."

"I'm sorry I didn't come to see her sooner, I didn't know she was here."

"Yeah, I'm," he sighed, "I'm sorry about that. We've had the nurse here, and well, there didn't seem to be any point in making a fuss when there are others you all need to worry about."

"As long as you know that if anything happens you come right away and get one of us."

"Will do, Doc."

He watched as Doc Roe walked out of the room, and he swallowed. He knew the truth. He'd not said anything because he was jealous; jealous of the fact that when Sarah woke up she would want to see one man only, and it wasn't him. All he wanted was to be the first thing she saw when she woke up. _Like somehow that would change things_.

He stared at her face, his stomach churning at the sight. _She's still beautiful._ He rubbed his hands on his face, and then clasped her hand. _Wake up._ Suddenly her brow furrowed, and he felt her hand squeeze his.

_Wake up._

* * *

It was white. Bright. She could hear the waves crashing, their power churning into the earth. She looked down and saw her bare feet covered in the sand. Smiling, she squelched her feet into the grains.

A hand then enclosed onto hers. She looked up to see her brother, Charles. _Come, sister. _He pulled her along the beach, until she could begin to make out the shape of another in the distance. Charles stopped. _He needs you._

She took a step forward, her print left in the sand. She turned back to Charles. He smiled at her and motioned her to keep going. The waves had a beat to them now, a rhythmic swallowing of the sea.

She looked past Charles' shoulder at her mountain in the distance. The spirits of her ancestors, their bones, were in this land. She knelt down and brushed her hand over the sand. _Hera, you must go._

There was a soft beat in the air. _Ser-rah. Ser-rah. _

She turned on her heel and ran towards the figure. Everything began to throb. The drum beat got louder. The sky darker, clouds rolling in._ Ser-rah. Ser-rah._

The figure wasn't getting any closer. Her lungs felt like they were going to burst. The waves started to get loud, the water churning in anger. She kept pushing. Her heart beating. _Ser-rah, Ser-rah, Ser-rah, Ser-rah._

All of a sudden the figure disappeared. She stopped. The sky cracked and lit up; the sound reverberating in her bones. It became darker, and darker, until she was in complete blackness.

* * *

_**Bastogne, December 23**__**rd**__** 1944**_

She was conscious. That much was obvious. She cracked an eye open and saw a ceiling. No sun, no snow, no dark. She slowly sat up, and felt stiff. Looking around, she realised she was in a room. _Did the krauts get me? _

She was by herself; the door was open. Scanning the room, she noticed a familiar uniform. _Mine. _Her arm was freshly bandaged. _Why would krauts go to so much trouble?_

Suddenly, she realised there was shouting outside. At first it was muffled, she couldn't make out the language. But she concentrated. _Focus._ "Take cover!" "Fuck!"

She flung her feet over the side of the bed. _Artillery? _ She stood up, perhaps a bit too fast, but kept her balance and slowly made her way out the door. It didn't take her long to realise that she was, in fact, in the aid station, but in an unknown room. She turned a corner and headed towards some stairs. Arriving at the top, she gazed down, and came face to face with Roo.

What seemed like an eternity passed, but she eventually broke their mutual gaze with a smile. _Thank god you're okay._ She took a tentative step down the stairs, but started to lose her balance. Falling forward, she quickly found herself in his arms.

"What the hell are you thinking?" He scolded.

"I feel fine!" She answered, annoyed at his response. He put his arm around her shoulders, and started leading her back to the bed.

"You shouldn't be out of bed." He said, this time quietly. Once in the room he stopped her at the bed. "Get in." She looked at him and raised an eyebrow. _Seriously?_ "Sarah. Get. In."

"Oh god, yes Father." She rolled her eyes at him. She climbed back into the bed with a huff. "Honestly, I feel, well, surprisingly good."

"You've said that before."

"What?"

"This isn't the first time you've woken up. Let's see, this is the..." he looked up, counting in his head. "This is the fifth time. And each time you've insisted you were fine, tried to get out of bed, and each time collapsed."

"Well, surely the fact that I made it down to the stairs is a good sign that I actually do feel fine this time."

"Hmph," he grunted.

She sat quietly for a few seconds. "James?"

He looked down at her, startled by her use of his first name. "What happened?" She asked quietly.

He smiled gingerly, and sat down on the chair next to her. "What is the last thing you remember?"

She thought long and hard. "Charles." She looked at the confused look on his face, and shook her head. "And you, I remember you."

"Charles?"

It was his turn to raise his eyebrow at her.

"I," She sighed. "I dreamt of him. It's nothing."

He looked at her, clearly not convinced, but he had enough respect for her not to press her on it. "After we found you, we carried you back. The tank column was on the move. We didn't think we could necessarily avoid it, so, well, we used it for cover."

"Are you serious?"

He grinned at her. "Yeah. I can't lay claim to that though, it was all Mouse."

She snorted. "You can't tell me you just merrily dragged me along behind a column of Panzer Lehr."

"It actually is as simple as it sounds. When we could we broke off, headed east into Neffe. Managed to scare the locals though, Cote took some a piece of shrapnel in his foot."

"Is he okay?"

"Yeah, he's hobbling around like an old man, but refuses to let anyone touch him."

She stared at her hands. "...Thank you."

"Jesus, Saz, you don't have to thank us. You'd do the same thing. It's what we do. We're family." _Family._ "Oh, and here," he rummaged in his pocket, and withdrew a crumpled piece of paper. "I found this."

_My letter._ She took it and then looked up at him. "Did you...?"

"No, I didn't read it. I wouldn't betray you like that."

She smiled at him. _No you wouldn't. Not after..._ "I tell you what," she started. "I'll tell you about Charles, if you'll tell me about Emily."

He sat back, surprised at hearing the name. "How...?"

She shrugged. "Well you told me you were engaged. It only took a few mumbles in your sleep for me to put two and two together. I never asked because I knew you didn't want to talk about it."

"And now?"

"And now, well... I just..." She shrugged.

He stared at her with an intensity she'd not seen for a long time. "Okay. It's not much of a story though." He took a deep breath. "We were high school sweethearts. Our mother's were friends; father's would play golf together. I was head over heels. I thought it was the real deal. Anyway..." He coughed, clearly uncomfortable.

She leaned forward and put her hand on his knee. "I'm sorry, you don't have to..."

"No it's fine. About time I told you anyway. We were engaged, planning the wedding, flowers this, food that. One day I came home early. Caught her in bed with my best friend."

_Wasn't expecting that._ She sat there quietly, not sure what to say.

"So, here I am. Explains a few things, yeah?"

"Yeah it does." _Why you're such a womaniser. Such a smartass. Why you're so loyal. So protective. _"Thank you."

"What for?"

"I treated you so badly but you're still here."

"Come on, Saz, I started it. I was selfish."

She reached out and pulled him in. The embrace was warm, and just what she needed. She immediately felt better. She may have lost Charles, but she had Roo. _Family._

* * *

**North of Bastogne, December 24****th****, 1944**

"Doc, how much further?"

"Not far, Lieutenant."

She nodded. The cold air in her face was hard and frigid, turning her nose red. It was painful, but it represented freedom. She'd only been in that room for a couple of days but it drove her nuts. Yes, she looked horrendous. Yes, she had her arm in a sling. No, she was not dizzy. Or weak. Or in pain (well, not much). But she was confined to her room by Captain Ryan like some child.

So she escaped.

When she saw Doc she knew it was her opportunity. _If I got him onside, I'd be able to get past Sink._ At first she tried being nice. When being nice didn't work, she had to just tell him that she was going. He studied her for a while, but eventually he decided that he would assist her in her endeavour.

The next step was Sink. _Dear old Colonel Sink. _He was actually easier than Doc. Apparently her visiting Easy would help to spread some Christmas cheer. All it took was for Doc to give a nod when Sink asked if she was okay.

A simple note was all she left for Ryan. _Going to see Easy._ She smiled._ Roo is going to be so pissed. _She'd worry about that later.

So she now found herself bumbling along the short journey to the line. "Sir?"

"Yes Lieutenant?"

"Shouldn't you be enjoying a hot meal and a drink at Division this evening?"

He chuckled. "I'll be making a late entrance. I'm not the only one giving up warmth tonight though, Lieutenant." He nodded at her. "The men will be happy to see you; you're a damn fine leader."

"Thank you, Sir. I'm looking forward to surprising them." _It's not exactly out of generosity though. _All she knew is that she wanted to see Dick. _Does he even know I'm alive?_ She'd not stopped thinking of him. His face. His shoulders. His embrace.

The jeep started to slow. Sarah looked up to see that they were approaching a clearing, and she could see a tent about 200 yards to the left. _Battalion CP. _The anticipation was building in the pit of her stomach; butterflies spreading. She was struggling to not to wear a silly grin.

They shuddered to a stop outside Battalion CP. Colonel Sink turned to her. "Lieutenant, one request."

"Yes sir?"

"Please join me when I speak to the men."

"Alright sir."

"With that in mind, can you please find Captain Winters for me? I need to speak with Colonel Strayer."

"Yes sir."

She followed him into Battalion CP, and noticed Nix in the corner, legs up on a crate, asleep. She smiled and approached him quietly. "Captain Nixon?" She said loudly.

He jerked, struggling to maintain his balance. "Mmmph?" He grumbled.

"Oi, Nix!" She said, giving him a small kick.

His eyes snapped open. He blinked at her, clearly trying to focus. "Well aren't you a sight for sore eyes." He grinned. "Literally. You make my eyes sore. Jesus," he sat up, "you sure know how to take a beating."

She snorted. "Nice to see you too, Nix."

He stood up and stepped towards her. "Come here, kid."

She stepped forward for a welcomed embrace. He gave her a pat on the shoulder, and they separated. "Boy Dick is going to have a heart attack when he sees you."

She smiled. "Well actually, Colonel Sink wants me to find him. Any idea where he is?"

He raised an eyebrow at her. "How convenient."

"Shut up Nix."

He laughed. "You two are more alike than you think." She cocked her head at him, and he just shook his head. "He said he was going to check on the men. He could be anywhere really."

She shrugged. "That's fine; I wouldn't mind seeing the boys anyway."

A serious look crossed his face. "It's good to see you safe Sarah."

"Thanks Lew." She gave him another small hug, and then walked out of the CP.

She walked north for a few hundred yards to find her first foxhole. She could hear the voices before she even arrived at the edge of it. _Toye and Guarnere._ She leant over the side. "Any louder boys and the Hitler could hear you."

They both turned their heads to the side and upwards, so much in unison that it was quite comical. "Lieutenant Price! How the fuck are ya?" Guarnere cried.

"Just rosey, Bill." She stuck a hand out. "Gimme a hand, will ya?" Bill and Joe both stood up, and helped her step into the foxhole. She leaned her back into the snow, and slid down.

Both of them just stood there, staring at her. "Oh come on guys, it's not like you've not seen this before."

They looked at each other, and slowly slid down next to her. "Yeah but, you know..." Joe started.

"We ain't exactly seen a broad all black and blue."

_Right. _"I'm not exactly a broad though." She looked down at herself. _Makes sense._ She nodded. "At least I'm here, right?"

They both smiled. "Damn straight!"

"How's second platoon going?"

"Oh you know, we're doing all the work as per usual." Joe smirked.

She snorted. "Oh yeah, and I know if I go ask Randleman he'd tell me you were stringin' me along."

Joe put his arm around her. "You know we'd never lie to you."

She leaned forward. "Only because you know what I'd do to you if you did. If you think this looks bad, just imagine what the kraut looks like." She raised an eyebrow and smirked. A quick glance flicked between the two friends, before Bill gave her a pat on the shoulder. _Did I miss something?_ She took a deep breath. "Anyway boys, the reason I was out wandering the line here was because Sink asked me to find Winters. Have you seen him?"

"Yeah he checked on us about ten minutes ago. Heading up to Buck's foxhole, I think."

She nodded. "Thanks boys." They all stood, with the boys offering her a hand out of the hole. She shook her head. "I got it this time." Placing her foot on the opposite side of the hole, she quickly pushed up and stepped up and out of the hole. She turned and gave them a wink. "I'll be seeing you."

Trudging through the snow, she found some footprints that she assumed could only be Dick's. _Surely I can't be far_. Quickly she spotted Buck. "Buck." He didn't respond. "Hey, Buck."

He looked up. "Oh, hey Lieutenant. How you doing?"

"I'm good Buck. Yourself?"

"Oh you know," he said quietly, "I'm doing good; doing good." He nodded absent-mindedly. She could feel herself frowning. _Something isn't right here._

"Have you seen Captain Winters?"

"Yeah sure, he relieved Heffron from forward watch. Just up there, 100 yards."

She leaned over and patted Buck on the shoulder. "Take care, Buck." He didn't respond.

Turning, she looked towards the watch, and suddenly felt a wave of nerves wash over her. She took a deep breath, and started towards it. _Just breathe._ It almost seemed like every step she took, he got farther away. But really she knew, even if she didn't want to admit it, that she was tired.

She stopped at the edge and looked down. He was barely inches from her, but she didn't make a sound. Instead she just stared, watching her breath evaporate in the cold air. "Heffron, you're supposed to be taking a break." Dick said, without looking up.

"It's not Heffron." He looked up this time. A series of emotions ran through his face. "You want to help me down before the krauts get another go at me?"

Now a look of horror crossed his face, and in a split second she had been helped down into the foxhole. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, thankful for the break. When she opened them, he was staring at her. She looked at him closely. She was almost afraid to touch him, simply because she wasn't sure she would stop.

He soon fixed that. Out of the blue he leaned forward, and started kissing her all over furiously. The last kiss was placed directly on her lips, and it felt like all of her nervousness; all of the butterflies were flying out of her. She returned the passion, and then broke off by kissing his cheek.

His hands cupped her cheeks, and he continued to stare at her. _Say something. _He soon broke the silence. "Oh god, Sarah. What did they do to you?"

She looked at his pained face, and the burden of carrying it all – the tiredness, the pain, the worry – was finally too much to bear. She leaned forward into the hollow of his chest, and softly cried. He held her close, stroking her hair. After a minute, she settled, and started to listen to the rhythm of his heartbeat.

It was calling her name. _Ser-rah. Ser-rah. Ser-rah._

And at that very moment, she knew this is where she was supposed to be.

* * *

Thanks for reading team xx


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